EVERYTHING’S GOING TO BE DIFFERENT NOW (and Why It Usually Isn’t)
Bay Rachelle LeBlanc Quiney, MBA, PCC
Executive Coach for Exceptionally Driven and Ambitious Professionals Who'd Like to Actually Enjoy Their Lives.
Have you ever had one of those lightbulb, aha moments? The ones that change everything? You can have them personally, or you can experience them on a broader scale (ahem, pandemic, political strife, et cetera).
That one moment seems to change everything, clarifying priorities and lighting the way forward like a beacon.
Now that everything is going to be different, what’s going to change? I am, by no means, making light of the incredibly long-awaited and hard-won victory in the recent political news. Trust me; I’m dancing with joy and relief, along with all those for whom the outcome of the election is like the breaking of dawn after a long, dark, ridiculous and ominous night.
But just as the incoming president-elect knows, the win is only the beginning. Everything up until now was just practice.
Now, the real work begins.
Have you ever found yourself thinking that if only X would change, then everything would be or could be different? That X is the reason you’re not able to live your life the way you want to be living?
Certainly, sometimes that’s true, to an extent. For sure there can be external factors that create seemingly or actually impassible obstacles.
Here’s what I know: when something big happens, it can be easy to think about how different everything is going to be from here on out. When you’ve been waiting and hoping for something to happen, you don’t even realize how long you’ve been holding your breath, waiting for the circumstances to change, and pinning the hopes you have for your future on that one single outcome.
We don’t realize how much we are at the effect of the circumstances and the world around us, or the full mental, emotional, spiritual and physical burden we carry at the best of times, let alone during times of duress, stress and adversity.
By “at the effect of”, I mean the way we sometimes feel like the powers that be are outside of us, as opposed to a sense of having internal power that we can wield over our life and circumstances. We’re talking about your locus of control: if it’s external, then life seems to happen to you, and if it’s internal, then you happen to life. An external locus of control means you’re in the passenger seat; an internal locus of control means you have the wheel (and the gas, and the brake).
It’s easy to think “at cause” is good and “at effect” is bad, when really, the reality is that both happen all the time and are neither good nor bad, though for sure they can be empowering or disempowering.
For example, no matter how much I empower my thinking, I can’t change the weather. I’m at the effect of the weather, because if it’s raining, and I go outside, I’m going to get wet. All I can do is change how I relate to the weather, so that if it’s raining, I understand that I’m choosing to go outside and do my thing, and relating to getting wet as if it isn’t the end of the world.
One locus of control isn’t better than the other, but it makes a difference as to how I experience my life, and whether I feel empowered to make change happen, or whether I sit around waiting for change to happen to me.
What I also know is that often, everything isn’t different just because one thing changed. Not right away, and not without a lot of intention, attention, and good old elbow grease (being at cause for what happens next).
It is right and good to celebrate a win, and for longer than seems reasonable, in my opinion. Life is short and we should probably celebrate as much as we can before we depart this lifetime.
And, if we want to see the change for which we’ve been yearning, it’s going to take something we haven’t been doing or being until now.
This is the same whether we’re talking about social justice, global unity, climate change, or the experience of life you want to be living, and the results you want to create.
It is easy to become complacent, because that is what we are used to being. That’s #science. According to Newton’s first law of physics, an object will not change its motion unless an external force acts upon it. So, objects in motion stay in motion and objects at rest stay at rest, and they don’t just magically change when the news report you’re watching changes.
That external force? That’s you, by the way. You are the force, Padawan. You can use it, or you can lose it, as the saying goes.
Now is the time to gather up the momentum of change, and use it to fuel your path forward.
Take rest when you need it, breathe deeply (we all need waaaay more of that). And, start to think about the change you want: in the world, and in your life.
Let’s let this glorious victory for democracy and humanity actually ignite DIFFERENT and BETTER, one life at a time, beginning with yours.
Let’s begin the revolution where the way it goes is no longer the way it goes. Where waiting for change isn’t the status quo, but creating it becomes the path forward.
For the world, and for your world.
THIS is what The Life Intentional is all about.
I know I can help people who I know could be living a life closer to the one they want. I know it because this is what I do with my clients: kick-ass people who are no longer content to remain in one experience of life when they know they want another. I know how to support people to take action on the things that are important to them, but keep getting back-burnered, in the triage of life’s priorities. I know tried-and-true ways of moving you forward into being at cause and in action for the life you want to live.
I also know that now may not be the time for you to hire a coach, one-on-one. Maybe you won’t ever feel called to hire a coach, but that doesn’t mean you can’t level up in your life, with a little support to guide you on the way, and avoid the common sand traps along the way.
What if you could make 2021 go differently than 2020, and not be at the effect of waiting for things to be different? Heads up: we’re still going to be in a pandemic, and part of a world that needs a lot of big change. If you do nothing differently, nothing will go differently.
You can help me create a movement of people who are no longer committed to letting life slide on by while hoping and dreaming of a life that is different. That’s what I love about the work I do: when I support people to create lives in which they are creating possibility, that means my world gets to have more possibility.
This is the revolution that is needed to move this world forward: ending apathy, one person at a time.
So, why do you keep putting off that you wish you were experiencing? Tell me.
What is the parallel life to the one you’re living? The one you want and can see from where you are, but the roads don’t intersect? Tell me.
How long are you willing to live the version of life you are getting, while you dream of a version of life you want, but remains just out of your reach?
I hope you’re not willing for one more day.
Join me in The Life Intentional, and let’s create the revolution, beginning with you.
> > > https://wonderlandandcompany.com/the-life-intentional/