Is Everything Okay?

"What if I don't come tomorrow?", asked Abhi, a dear colleague of mine. "Where are you going?", I asked. My question was an instinctive reaction to his, as I just began to turn my chair to look at him as he responded. Something was different that day, or maybe it was for a few days, and I hadn't noticed what I'd noticed that day. "Is everything okay?" I asked Abhi, and he instantly cracked a joke, and we burst into laughter. 

Days passed, and one day, as we were sipping our morning coffee together, the question came again. "What if I didn't turn up to work tomorrow?". I couldn't afford to ignore it this time around. "What's the matter Abhi? Is everything okay?" Before he could try to deflect my question, I said, "Let's go down for a walk". He agreed, and we took the stairs down. I could hear his heart pounding, he had a smile, but I knew he wasn't prepared for this conversation. 

As he lit his cigarette, he started smiling and soon laughing out a loud, saying, "You got scared? I was just joking!" He knew that I knew that he wasn't joking. But this was another attempt to avoid this conversation. "This isn't the first time you told me this, Abhi, and I know you are hiding something from me." He didn't expect me to counter his laughter this time around. 

"I don't know what to do, Gopal. I feel like.....," he said as tear's starting rolling down his cheeks. We will get through anything in this world, okay? whatever the situation be, you have my word, but tell me what happened?", I kept asking, as I knew it was important for him to 'Open Up'. This was a time when seeking help wasn't widely accepted. Not sure if it is even today. We often ignore our feelings and thoughts. Emotions are complex and it is important that we sought help, especially when we are going through tough times like what Abhi was going through.

Abhi had a very humble background; all he cared for was his family being happy. Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected a Big-hearted guy like him to sound like he wants to give up on life. 

"I owe almost 2.5 million/ 25 lakhs to banks, and I don't have the money", he said. 

His sister got married a couple of years ago, and he helped his family cover the expenses. I never thought that he would have that much debt on his name. He couldn't afford that much. 'Tell me more', I said.

"Gopal, I took 1.5 million/15 lakhs from the bank to start a new venture along with Vikram" (he was his childhood friend, running a small restaurant). "He wants to exit the business now and want to pay his share of debts, my debt's have grown significantly over last 18 months as i defaulted a few times"; he said as I could see, his hand started shivering and moving towards picking up another cigarette. 

"And you don't have your share of money to pay, correct?" I asked and stopped him from picking up his next cancer stick.

"Yes, and now the banks have sent me a legal notice to pay up", he said.

"When did this happen? How long is this going on for?", I asked. 

"It's been going on for 6 months, and now they have started calling me daily Gopal". Now I knew why I couldn't get him on calls, or messengers whenever I tried to reach him.

"We'll sort this out, don't worry", I said

"No, Gopal, I don't think it's that easy", Abhi said. I've been put on a Performance Improvement Plan; I just haven't been able to focus on anything at work. Moreover, my sister called me the other day and said that my mom hasn't been keeping well and needs to undergo her next round of chemotherapy. How am I going to solve all this? My only mistake was that I trusted Vikram! 

Abhi needed help, a big one. One that ensured that he got his life back on track! 

"We definitely need professional help to sort some of these, but One at a time", I said

Did you talk to your boss about this?, I asked. No, why, what will I say? What will he even do?, was his response. He clearly didn't even want to go that path. He had no courage to explain these to his boss. 

It would be best if you kept your boss informed, he needs to know the reasons behind some of your latest performance issues. Not that anything would change, but you may just be able to put your point across. We all have challenges in life, don't' we?, I asked. To while he smiled and said, 'Really?'. I could empathize with what he was going through wasn't easy for anyone. 

Once you speak to your boss, You must work hard enough to get yourself out of this PIP; this job is critical to pay off your debt and help cover medical expenses for your mom. isn't it? I asked. 'Oh yes, you are right, Gopal! All I want is for my parents to be happy, he said.  

"Alok is a very good friend of mine. Why don't you talk to him? He helps' manage my finances. I am meeting him on Saturday, do you want to come along? Let's get some solutions to get you out of your financial issue, may be also help us speak to lawyer who could resolve the legal notice issue", I said.

"Do you think it would work? He asked. I am sure we will find a way out, I said. I couldn't have said anything else at that time. All I needed then was to shift his focus to the world of 'possibilities'.

"Sure, let's do that, he said. I could see the confidence in his voice coming back again!" Probably he saw the ray of hope to come out of this.

He called me the other day, inquiring if everything was okay with me during the COVID-19 times, we had a good time talking about a few things, remembering times we spent together. 

After the initial challenges, Abhi also went through therapy. He quit his job and took over the restaurant. He worked hard enough to pay off the debts. Got married his childhood sweetheart, and they both have a cute little beautiful daughter. His mother lost the battle to cancer, but he is happy that he could spend good time with her, especially during her last few days. Since then, He never quit, never lost hope!

His business got impacted during the first few days of Lock-down, but he kept his kitchen open to serve the needy and the poor. He probably felt supported then, and that's why he wants to help more people who are struggling now! 

How are you? Is everything okay? Never thought these questions had this much power!