Everything is inaccessible but no able-bodied cares

(A twisted homage to Louis CK)

You know, it's a wild world we live in. Here I am, the Ambassador of Awesomeness, yet navigating daily life sometimes feels like I'm in a low-budget sci-fi movie where the set designers forgot about wheelchairs.

Take buildings, for instance. They're like these mysterious ancient temples with secret passages. "Oh, the accessible entrance? It's just around the corner, past the dumpster, through the alley, and under the mystical hidden bridge." I mean, come on, I'm just trying to get a coffee, not embark on a quest for the Holy Grail.

And then there's public transportation. Buses and trains treat me like I'm playing a game of chance. "Will the ramp work today, or is it a day off?" It's like rolling the dice in a game of Dungeons & Dragons. "You've encountered a broken ramp. Roll a D20 to see if you'll make it to your meeting on time."

And let's talk about those 'accessible' bathrooms. They're like a puzzle room challenge. "Congratulations, you've entered the bathroom! Now, solve the riddle of the misplaced grab bars and the mysteriously vanishing turning space to win the prize of basic human dignity!"

But the real kicker? The digital world. Here I am, a tech guy, and half the websites treat accessibility like it's an optional DLC. "Oh, you want to use a screen reader? That's going to be an extra level unlock." I'm half expecting to find a website that says, "Press 'Alt+F4' for accessibility options."

And the reactions from the able-bodied crowd? Priceless. "What do you mean you can't get up the stairs? Have you tried just, you know, walking?" Oh, right, let me just activate my hidden Transformer mode. Silly me for not thinking of that!

But hey, at least I've got my trusty wheelchair, right? It's like my personal all-terrain vehicle. Except when it's not. "Oh, you wanted to go over that tiny bump? Sorry, this model only handles perfectly flat, frictionless surfaces."

And then there's the classic, "You're such an inspiration!" for doing, well, pretty much anything. "Wow, you cook your own meals? Amazing!" Yes, because stirring pasta is right up there with climbing Everest.

But you know what? Despite all this, I keep rolling along, turning every obstacle into a chance for innovation. I've even teamed up with my buddy and we're tackling these challenges head-on, one 3D-printed wheelchair accessory at a time. We're like the dynamic duo of accessibility, if Batman and Robin had to deal with broken elevators and websites that think 'accessibility' is a font choice.

So here we are, in the 21st century, where everything is amazing but when it comes to accessibility, it's like we're still sending telegrams. "STOP. Can't enter building. STOP. Send help. STOP."

But don't worry, we've got this. We're not just sitting around waiting for the world to catch up. We're out here, making waves, flying drones with muscle impulses, and showing the world that accessibility isn't just a nice-to-have – it's a must-have. And we're doing it with style, a bit of humor, and a whole lot of determination. Because if there's one thing I've learned, it's that a good laugh and a bit of creativity can turn even the most inaccessible staircase into a ramp to the future.