“Everyone’s Losing Their Minds!” . . . or is it also something else?

A friend of mine I haven’t seen in a while invited me to a presentation about a new health product.? I was glad to be in a room full of other people, and just high enough to see the tops of trees for miles around through big picture windows.

Afterward, we decided to grab a bite at a local restaurant.? As we were seated, I heard a woman’s animated voice say, “everyone’s losing their minds! – people don’t care if they bump into each other or even push them over while walking down the street . . .” and the list went on and on.? And then she took a deep breath, as though winded from running, as her emotions started to settle down.? The other three at the table began adding to the list of how people were losing their minds; one set off the other and then back again and the draining emotional energy bounded around like a ping-pong ball.

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When they signed the tab and started to go, I heard one say with notable sarcasm and a long deep sigh, “O.K.!? Well, that’s a good note to end on!”?

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I hear this conversation everywhere: walking along the path at a local nature preserve, in line at the grocery store, people talking in cars waiting at the gas stations – everywhere!

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But at our table, my friend and I were having a different kind of conversation about the topic.? Although the pandemic and other global issues were throwing us into a world of chaos, there was also a different kind of awakening taking place; an intuitive and illuminated awareness of who we are as human beings, first.?

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Inside the tragic situation, a seed of sorts was planted.?

As a result of the sudden contrast that surfaced quickly and could be readily experienced; one between a life lived under the stresses and burnout of work requirements that had built up over centuries of course, but especially the past 25 years, paradoxically, some people also started to actually feel better on some level; more open to themselves; a deeply human level.?

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Whether the house was full of children or people spending more time together or even surviving the most difficult kinds of isolation but with time to discover themselves in new ways – while uniquely historic problems swirled around the world, ironically people also found something like a sense of more ease in terms of how they spent their time; honing in on the most important relationships in their lives and attending to those they loved with intense and deeply felt care.?

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Work can be great in so many ways and can provide a lot of meaningfulness and satisfaction with life when we get to do things we care about while being treated well in the process.? The Hawthorne Studies proved this almost 100 years ago but some have forgotten those lessons learned.? Over these last couple of decades many have found meaningfulness has faded and turned into something like being a somewhat useless but required automaton.?

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Some executives have realized that employees can be driven by fear and threats but many have tried to put in programs to ‘increase meaningfulness’ in one way or another.??

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However, meaningfulness is a feeling.? Feelings can be episodically intensified or quieted by things like corporate training programs or something like that but at its core –feeling like one is doing meaningful work can’t be ‘forced’ into being.?

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So, for most of us, we have to find other sustainable ways to reignite our direct connection to our hearts which then starts to create the conditions under which a more hopeful and steady mind can take hold.??

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In the 4th?century, a female poet Su Hui, wrote an unmatched pictorial poem in which for the first time, spoke about something she called “heartmind”; one thing - not two opposing or different things.??

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To clear away the debris that’s piled up recently under which our heartmind lives and can thrive even in these most difficult times, we need to find a different relationship to chaos and its effect upon us.? But how?? How do we do that in the middle of what feels like an F5 tornado every time we turn around.

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Well – let’s step back for minute.? One thing to keep in mind is that we are all born of chaos.? ?In some ways, we can say we are ‘children of chaos’.?

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The universe itself is created out of seemingly endless chaos; gases and rocks and combinations of these things crashing into each other, spinning out planets and suns into infinite space and time, over and over and over again.? Eventually stars collapse and collide with other dying stars for some of the most spectacular universal fireworks ever!?

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“Newborns” like more planets are always forming; creating sparks that swirl in endless regeneration.??So, if we think about it, without chaos, we wouldn't be here!

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So it’s self-evident that people and chaos go together amazingly well.? Even so, at this point in time it’s challenging to consider - let alone care about our shared interconnectedness with such things.

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But as many of us have talked about over the years, there are amazing treasures to be found by doing so – without any more to-do lists or effortful work.

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In fact, we can start by first imagining it’s possible to dance with chaos, instead of fighting with it at least some of the time.? This seemingly simple idea is actually quite tricky to pull off but it can be done.? Using easy, small steps we can find a kind of rhythm and resonance with our own version of swirling sparks.

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In other words, we can find ways to partner with chaos that help us focus attention on something like tiny dots of light like the reflection of stars on the ocean’s surface on a moonless night; small spots that carry a bit more lightness of being, are slightly brighter than their surroundings; opening doors and windows into ways to navigate our world without using as much effort and rigidity as we do when we turn to fight something off.?

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One example was in the restaurant tonight:? Within a few feet of me were people fighting with chaos understandably so.? But at our table we were finding ways to dance with it instead – finding those brighter lights and new places to actively live better - even if for that brief hour or so in the restaurant!.?

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Our server overheard our conversation and asked if she could join in.? We said of course.? She related a story I've heard dozens of times in one way or another - especially by young people.? ?It was around her desire to focus more on her health and overall well-being; finding a way through life that could be helpful to people.? So she found it inspiring to hear us talking about another way through.? She asked to be notified about the launch of DancingWithChaos.org built to be one way to restore social wellness in new ways and re-energize what’s already there! – our heartmind – with proven methods – together.