Everyone wants to be popular, right?

Leaders face tough decisions daily. Sometimes those choices won't win them popularity contests but are necessary for the organization's long-term success.

History is filled with examples of leaders who made tough, unpopular decisions that ultimately proved to be the right call. Take Steve Jobs, for instance. When he returned to Apple in 1997, the company was struggling, and Jobs made the controversial decision to streamline Apple's product line, cutting over 70% of existing products. This decision was not well-received initially, but it refocused the company and paved the way for innovations like the iMac, iPod, and iPhone, transforming Apple into the powerhouse it is today.

Reed Hastings made the controversial decision to shift Netflix from a DVD rental service to a streaming platform. While the move may seem obvious in hindsight, it was a huge risk at the time and involved significant investments in streaming technology and content creation. This shift faced backlash, particularly when Netflix increased subscription prices to fund its new strategy. Despite the initial backlash, this pivot transformed Netflix into a leader in the entertainment industry and set the standard for streaming services.

Similarly, leaders today must balance the desire to be liked with the need to prioritize what is best for their organizations, even when it means taking the less popular path. Continue reading the following excerpt from the bestselling book, FANNY RULES: A Mother’s Leadership Lessons that Never Grow Old, as I share a personal anecdote my mother taught me about the importance of making decisions based on priority rather than popularity.

EVERYONE WANTS TO BE POPULAR, RIGHT?

But the popular choice is not necessarily the one with the highest level of priority, and popular decisions do not always lead to the greatest reward. Choosing popularity over priority may be the easiest because it generally involves the path of least resistance. However, the responsibility of the leader is to make good choices, not easy ones.

Popularity can come in different forms other than just about being liked. Sometimes we make popular choices because others have made it an acceptable option. For example, fashionable clothing and material possessions deemed to be in high demand, almost de facto to a form of being popular as they, too, reflect the most common choice.

When you grow up in a family with modest means, you count every penny, nickel, and dime you earn, and if you’re lucky, you get to count some of the coins twice for good measure. Being budget-conscious, Fanny taught us to shop with a frugal mindset. Mom was a master at making two nickels into a quarter, and she always looked for the best deals.

One afternoon, Mom and my niece went shopping for school clothes. It was more than a thirty-minute drive from our little town to a grocery or department store, so there was plenty of time for girl talk on the way into the city. Naturally, the conversation turned to fashion—the colors, the look, and the feel. As they drove toward the city, country music played on the radio, the hillbilly air conditioning at full force—windows open—and the car swerving to miss potholes. It was almost as fun as riding a roller coaster when Fanny was behind the wheel.

My niece, the daughter of my sister who is nine years my senior, had her heart set on one particular school outfit. She had cut out pictures from the Sears and Roebuck catalog and taped them to a piece of paper so they would be top of mind. When the car stopped in the city, my niece quickly realized where they were. Her eyes got as big as the saucers on Aunt Millie’s favorite tea set. Holding back the tears, she got out of the car and carefully closed the door. Mom and my niece stood in front of the local thrift shop, not the fancy department store.

Disappointed.

Upset.

Heartbroken.

Mom put an arm around her and gave her a tender kiss on the head and offered a sweet smile of reassurance to say, “We’ve got this.” With her purse on one arm and the hand of her granddaughter on the other, they entered the store. Mom reached into her pocket and took out a carefully folded piece of paper. It was my niece’s fashion collage. In a shocked voice, still being respectful, my niece asked, “Why did you bring that piece of paper? We’re not going to find those clothes here.”

“That’s right,” Fanny replied, and with a wink, she added, “We’re going to find something better.” Now whether or not my niece believed it, Fanny did, and when Fanny believed it, the rest of us got religion, too.

It took several hours of carefully mixing and matching, trying on, and putting back. Finally, Mom scored and found several pieces of clothing that would do just fine. She knew how to fix them up, dust them off, and make them look like new. My niece didn’t get what she had her heart set on—she got the ones that were the best buy for the money they had. In this mentoring lesson, Fanny taught her that you could be just as successful shopping with a priority mindset as when you buy with popularity.

This little trip and its outcome were the norms for our family, not the exceptions. Mom had this knack for taking the most out-of-date, downtrodden item and giving it new life. When it was time for her to shop for my brother and me, Mom often took us to this low-budget department store called Hills. We thought it was a big deal mostly because we got to ride the penny pony out front if we had been good inside.

Each year, I proudly wore fashionable Hills clothing on my first day of school. Mom said they came from the best designer rack in the store. It wasn’t until I got to high school that I realized “CLEARANCE” wasn’t a brand name.

When prioritizing, it’s essential to avoid decisions that simply please other people. Leaders must be able to separate refusal from rejection, realizing you cannot please everyone all the time. Consider the Return on Time (ROT) and Return on Investment (ROI) as part of the economic decision-making factors. Sometimes decisions involve resource allocation and setting minimums of time and resources to maximize effort and effectiveness for winning results.

Prioritizing actions that produce desired results—those that are meaningful and intentional—means the leader will contemplate all angles leading to the goal. These leaders will consider being open-minded and listening to the voice of their most trusted council. Finally, leaders who understand prioritization integrate both self and others’ feelings and know that the final choice is always within the leader’s purview. The every best decision may very well be the choice of priority and popularity. It’s rare when the stars align in this fashion, but it can happen.

Fanny had a unique way of summing up popularity: “Someone who makes choices to be liked doesn’t require much information.” She was right. Choosing not to take the road most traveled, the fashion that is trending, or not acquiescing to the need to be liked takes knowledge, a discerning spirit, and a fair amount of guts to make the right call.

Leaders are not in their positions to make the easy choices. They are there to make the right ones. While it's tempting to take the popular route, the true measure of leadership lies in prioritizing what’s best for the organization, even when it's not well-received in the moment. Fanny’s lesson reminds us that the courage to choose priorities over popularity can lead to outcomes far greater than what we initially envision. So, the next time you're faced with a difficult decision, remember that true leadership is about looking beyond the momentary allure of being liked and focusing on the long-term impact of your choices. The road less traveled is often the path that leads to lasting success.

For more insights on leading with courage and prioritizing effectively, stay tuned for Ben-Jamin Toy and my upcoming co-authored book, The Cohesive Leader. It’s a guide for those who aspire to be the kind of leader who makes effective choices, not just the easy ones.

Leadership often feels like a race against time, but sometimes, the best way forward is to slow down. Mindful leadership is about mastering our attitude and actions to create a more balanced and productive environment.

In the recent Leading On Purpose newsletter, learn how simple practices like pausing before reacting and embracing mindfulness can prevent burnout and foster a cohesive team. Click here to discover how small changes can lead to big transformations in both personal performance and organizational culture.

Dr. Troy

Recognized as Talent Retention Expert of the Year by International Association of Top Professionals, Top Business Leader by Valiant CEO Magazine, a Brainz Magazine 500 Global Award recipient, featured on The Today Show, ABC, the Global BV-TV Network, Beyond the Business Radio Show, and CEO World, Dr. Troy Hall is an award-winning talent retention consultant, international?speaker, and author of the bestselling titles; Cohesion Culture: Proven Principles to Retain Your Top Talent, and Fanny Rules: A Mother’s Leadership Lessons That Never Grow Old. As the founder of Cohesion Culture?, Dr. Troy has dedicated his career to establishing a cycle of culture wellness in the corporate and professional sphere.?His consulting and executive coaching engagements are built on the strategic framework of Cohesion Culture?, making the concepts of belonging, value, and shared commitment easy for organizations to adopt and implement.