Every City Needs A North Market
Though existing in various forms since 1876, Columbus's North Market is but a spring chicken when compared to these smiling charmers above. Either their math's a trifle spotty, or, perhaps, they really have been willing and available a smidgen longer. All kidding aside, however, any way you slice it, the North Market's longevity truly is a remarkable accomplishment, even though the basic concept is so simple you'd have thought every American city of note would have copied it by now. And yet amazingly enough few of them have anything even remotely like it.
In the name of full disclosure, my latest visit does occur the same weekend as the Arnold Fitness Classic, meaning that business is especially robust. Somehow this fact escapes us until we arrive on scene, and wonder where this ungodly foot traffic is originating, blocks before our even reaching the market. But sales have been trending upward in general at the North Market, it's safe to say, and at present there doesn't appear to be a true dud vendor in the bunch. At any rate, none of the takeaways from this trip were altered by these welcome yet insane crowds. With fellow sleuths Erin, Daniel, and Stephanie accompanying me this time around, we park and descend upon the market to piece together an up-to-date report card.
For the uninitiated, the map above is a handy decoder key. Inside a sprawling brick warehouse-sized building, individual business owners operate their stalls under a few loose North Market bylaws. Most are standalone local operations, while some, like Katzinger's and Stauf's, are satellite outposts branching off from main locations elsewhere in town, and then there's the occasional national brand now and then, like Jeni's Splendid Ice Cream (although, true, they did originate here in Columbus anyway). Every Saturday from spring through fall brings with it a farmers' market, too, under a pavilion at the parking lot's edge.
Like many conventional supermarkets, produce is the first category you see if arriving via the main (east) entrance. Little Eater Produce & Provisions is apparently the operation currently filling this niche, although two prominent, full color signs read Vegetable Butcher and I initially assume this is the name of the business. This unclear bit of branding, while by appearances maybe minor, I think neatly summarizes some problems this vendor faces – while I’m sure they are “locally committed” and that their wares are “meticulously selected,” as their bylines state, the displays here are a shade shy of breathtaking. You want your produce visuals to pop, and in my opinion previous tenants The Greener Grocer accomplished this to a greater degree. So there is some room for improvement here, particularly as they're competing with a farmer's market one (very busy) day of the week. Here are some visuals comparing the two, starting with now:
And then here's how the space looked before, under the previous tenants:
But of course, the nature of the beast here at North Market means that businesses come and go. We don’t much mourn the fate of former vendors, and in fact might not want it any other way – the thrill of discovering something new is part of what draws people here. I don’t intend to dedicate much space rhapsodizing about occupants of yore, interesting though these trivia tidbits might be. For example, right now I’m picturing market history buffs choking on their lobster gumbo to learn that Bob The Fish Guy used to keep his cash in the basement freezer every night. Fascinating, fascinating stuff, to be sure. Then again, this could explain why Bob The Fish Guy is no longer around.
Fortunately another operation seized that mantle and ran with it, the slightly modified stall by the name of The Fish Guys who’ve slung seafood in the same space ever since. If I’m not mistaken they even inherited the same case signs that Bob Reany and company once used. One of his employees, the soup wizard Bobby, doesn’t appear to be plying his wares here any longer, but otherwise everything is business as usual. The Fish Guys occupy the largest acreage inside this market, and with good reason, as their reputation as the finest seafood mongers in town remains unchallenged.
I must admit we didn’t pick up anything from these intrepid ocean captains this time around. However, hopefully by piecing together the photographs below, as well as our first hand reviews, a potential shopper might glean what’s happening inside these vaunted corridors. Greeting us directly inside the southeast entrance is this satellite location for the famous local Katzinger’s deli. Erin and I in fact require no additional prompts , and immediately hop in this line, while the other two members of our party continue exploring. If in need of a little convincing yourself, you might want to check out the giant pickle barrels immediately to the right of their counter – these are free, so take as many as you wish. Speaking from experience I would say if you try nothing else here, do not skip the garlic variety, as it has to be the best pickle known to mankind.
As for the sandwiches, I think it's a great idea that these are numbered, and that these numbers last through the ages. At both here and the primary spot on South 3rd Street, these are brought in and out of the rotation, or dropped completely over time. Erin orders #78, Seth’s Bella MushReuben, which is pictured below. I have #70, Kahrl’s Killer Club, one of their top 5 most popular offerings. And while my club is this heaping monstrosity of tastiness – even in the quote unquote “Normal” size that I order – the MushReuben is a slightly more compact flavor bomb, jammed with portabellas, Swiss, cole slaw and Russian dressing on rye.
(Above: Seth’s Bella MushReuben at Katzinger’s Deli, with glorious pickle sidecar)
A hunk of gouda at Black Radish Cremery rounds out our meal. One recommendation for Black Radish would be to place some passive demos for a few of their flavors. This worked like a charm for CaJohn’s hot sauce operation next door, where we wound up purchasing one of their bottles:
As for Daniel and Stephanie, they both go for a full Polish lunch from Hubert’s Kitchen. A tireless worker and genuinely nice guy, Hubert is one of the all-time great stories found within these vaunted aisles. An employee of many years’ standing for North Market Poultry, he eventually branched out and opened his own thriving enterprise. Daniel and Stephanie agree that the sauerkraut stew is the standout dish this time around, while also recommending the pierogi and kielbasa.
After grabbing a table up on the second floor and devouring our grub, we return to the ground level and begin phase two. This you might roughly term the dessert and random packaged good acquisition stage. If a person is so inclined, The Barrel And Bottle offers cold single beers in their cooler, many of them local, available for sipping whilst strolling these glorious grounds. This writer recommends Columbus Brewing Co.’s Bodhi Double IPA for just such endeavors. He also tried Ohio Common Ale’s Six.One For Good on this particular voyage and considers it average yet unexceptional.
Destination Donuts is an intriguing concept in that they only offer a couple flavors at a time, whatever happens to be emerging from the fryers at that moment. Erin opts for a plain old glazed variety that are piping hot and fresh, though as you can see below the buckeyes are also looking pretty durn tasty and I consider her crazy for not picking any up. For good measure, we also grab the last pistachio dacquoise over at Pistachia Vera.
As you can gather, even amid these extreme crowds owing to the nearby fitness extravaganza, this is a mostly positive visit. You have no real competition outside yourselves here, so the only question is how long you can continue raising the bar and elevating your game even higher. However, there are a couple of challenges the market might wish to address. One would concern attempting to purchase packaged items from restaurants with long lines for freshly prepared foods. We were thinking about picking up some Asian trinkets from Nida’s Sushi, but thought better of it and put the items down rather than endure this considerable wait. Granted, this visit is a rather extreme example, but it’s a problem worth considering. I’m not sure what the answer is, as space might not permit a second register for packaged goods alone. One all purpose register could work, to ring up these items for all vendors, though again this might prove a bookkeeping nightmare and difficult to police from a shoplifting standpoint.
Also, while only of concern to those on the inside, a consistent employee discount would work wonders. I can speak from experience that employee discounts here range from consistent at some stalls, dismissed with a scoff at others, dependent upon who happens to be working that day at others still, to those where the owners are pursing their lips and questioning whether you’re even employed here despite wearing a current uniform and being on the payroll for months. End result being that many an employee decides on a daily basis to grab some maybe average pizza for that bankable $1 off they receive, rather than branching out and trying something new, or confronting stalls where owners are potentially hostile to this discount topic. And on the flipside, a consistent discount policy would help other owners track missing profits due to employee making up prices on the spot.
The bathroom situation, while theoretically up to code, seems a little inadequate for an enterprise of this size and might need to be tackled at some point soon. Parking is also somewhat of an ongoing issue. Perhaps we could dynamite Nationwide Arena and put the space to better use as a garage. On that note, I leave you with a photo dump of some other nifty images I couldn't think to include anywhere else during this state-of-the-union update:
