Every Adventure Requires a First Step

Every adventure requires a first step.

I've been really inspired recently listening to the Glennon Doyle podcast ' We can do hard things'.

I love this mantra in life because we really can when we choose to do so. Glennon talks a lot about recovery. For me, that will forever be the hardest thing I've ever done,there have been many hard things in the intervening couple of decades of sobriety but, they've all been done sober and that is hugely helpful in my life. I have the focus to deal with hard things with a clear head.

When I was drinking my world was really small and I spent far too much of my time being scared; scared of other people's judgement, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of commitment. Fear of everything really. It's why I’m so committed to working freeing ourselves from fear.

When I was six months sober, I made the decision to do the second scariest thing I could think of. I had always wanted to travel the world, but fear had stopped me. So, I made a deal with myself that if I could stay sober for a year, I would go off back- packing around South America.

I flew to Peru in January 2002, and I was so terrified that I couldn't engage in a conversation on the plane. I realised pretty quickly that I would need to push myself way beyond my comfort zone or it would be a sad and lonely adventure.

The confidence this trip gave me shaped my life in ways that I could never have dreamed of. I now? have the freedom of knowing that I can go anywhere and do anything I choose to put my mind to. I've got amazing memories and friends in far flung places.

You know we all have voices in our heads.? If I'm having a wee fearful moment, I kindly say to myself "Lee, you can do this thing, YOU went to Peru". It's just a momentary lapse.? The more we push ourselves outside of our comfort zone, the bigger the comfort zone becomes.

Solo travel is scary and daunting and magical. I think it's one of the best gifts we can ever give to ourselves, especially as women. We learn to be independent in ways that we don't at 'home'. Humility, patience, joy and the ability to navigate the world and to communicate without a shared language are some of the best life skills.

Last year after Covid I decided to take myself off to Ecuador for a solo menopausal adventure.

When I arrived, it was at the start of the 'parra' which translates to; ‘massive civil unrest and the introduction of martial law in many of the major towns and cities’.

My trip didn't go anywhere close to plan, and I accidentally ended up in the Galapagos. That is literally the best accident I've had so far in my life.

My top ten tips for lone travel are:-

1. Do your research, buy a decent guide book and plan what you will do. I generally choose two things that are my 'must do lists' and everything else is a bonus. I like to leave things a bit loose so that if I find out about an exciting thing I didn't know about, I can fit it in.
2. Do a free walking tour when you arrive, most big cities have these and it's a great way to see the main sites and find your bearings.
3. Don't be afraid of hostels. They are a brilliant way to meet other people and they generally have way more information and insight than hotels. I get a private room and avoid hostels with bars.
4. Go on tours. It’s great to do 'independent' travel but local tour guides have the best knowledge and information and again, it’s a great way to get to meet people. Playground rules apply, - I take sweeties on tours as, it's a great way to start a conversation with people.
5. Learn at least a few words of the local language.
6. Learn a bit about local customs and culture.
7. Travel light. Life, is way too short for humphing around enormous bags of crap. I've never been anywhere that I can't buy toiletries or wash my clothes. I travel with a small rucksack around the size of a school bag.
8. Be kind to yourself, I have a really terrible sense of direction, so I need to ask for help a lot! I always carry enough cash that if I need to I can get a taxi.?
9. Use local buses and trains., It’s part of the adventure and a great way to see the world. In Peru there are a lot of chickens on buses. In Bulgaria the long-distance buses stop at petrol stations so that people can get off and have a smoke break- on the forecourt.
10. Trust your instinct.This this is a life rule but especially for travel. If something feels dodgy, walk away.?

Another suggestion would be never to to never ever bring back 'hats' from Gambia (or anything else) but that is a story for a different day.

Finally, just do it. Every adventure in life requires a first step.

I can't take you across the world to explore Peru, but I can take you across a fire if you want a bit of help with first steps.