Events, alcohol and me – 5 ways to kick a habit (and other general musings)

It is nothing amazing, but 40 days ago I stopped drinking alcohol.

People do this every day, nothing new here. Except that for pretty much my entire adult life,?I haven’t gone more than a week without the booze being a part of it.

Do I have a problem with alcohol? No. I didn’t think so. But with some thinking about it, I realised that I couldn’t think of a time I haven’t used the crutch of alcohol when I’ve been stressed, or socialised and even networked?without?a glass of wine.?

2021, was a horrible year for me. As it was for many. Having lost my dad at the beginning of the year and my mum being diagnosed with cancer at the halfway mark gave cause to some pretty turbulent times. The same year saw me have quite a nasty bout of covid, pivoting and working harder throughout the pandemic as well as launching a new business and moving house a few times (yes, a few) Add to this weight gain (thank you cortisol), mood swings, anxiety and fatigue, perimenopause seemed to have kicked in too.?2022 has been picking up and driving the business forward but I forgot that me and my body are important parts of the machinery of success for our new business,?conferenceemcees.com

If you are reading this and know me, you know I don’t like to be beaten, and this time was no different. I got to halfway through the year and realised that there was one person who needed to make some changes. Taking back control meant just that. Would changing how I fuel my body make a difference? Could I go out and experience life in a very booze filled world without the crutch??

I created “Dry Junjulery” (copyright???) as the time was right to make these changes. It was a close friend’s 40th, big industry events and of course British summer, where we spend a short amount of time outside drinking rosé before the rain starts again (about the first day of the school holidays) so if this experiment was to work, I wanted to create the right conditions to be challenged by it and see the outcome. Sorry to all you lovers of Dry January. That’s too easy when it’s cold, dark after lunchtime and you’ve partied all December, not challenging enough for me ;)

Here are my take aways, read them, disagree with this and bin them or use them. I don’t mind. But I think I would have enjoyed reading this before I started.?

1.?Do it with someone else.

If you are in a relationship, do this together. Or agree with a pal to partner up and support each other. My partner jumped onto the wagon and with only one minor blip, we navigated this journey together and without killing each other.?My friend came to stay early on and whilst we were not banning anyone else boozing, she joined us on the wagon and that was really supportive.?

2.?Discover alcohol alternatives.??

One excuse for not giving up the booze was that I don’t drink sugary or fizzy drinks and water is boring on a night out. But I discovered that was a 1982 attitude. Whilst the non-alcoholic/dealcoholized wine is fairly average, the beers and ciders are both low calorie and taste like beer and cider. (Stop the press!) Our recommendation is?Peroni ,?Brew Dog ?and?Waitrose cider .?

But if wine is your thing (it is ours), however the biggest surprise was gin. Tanquerey ?(a large one obvs) and tonic hits the dopamine button very nicely. And as this is what our bodies want, why not have a second!?

3.?Accepting others drink alcohol and won’t be a self-aware as you!??

As there are more qualified and experienced non-drinkers out there, this one should come as no surprise to many. But this was something I think needs to go into the tips list. There is a tolerance level for me being around people drinking. I’ve accepted that people (including me!) change under the influence, some for the good, most for the bad and there is a time and point when I needed to exit. But most importantly, don’t feel guilty about this! So far, I haven’t had any friends or colleagues stop speaking to me because of that.?

4.?You will feel the benefits.

I haven’t got an I feel amazing story, as during this time I’ve been tested and have a vitamin b12 deficiency, but without any doubt the quality of sleep has improved considerably. I have increased my exercise (because I don’t have hangovers!) and changed food habits, to eat cleaner (because I don’t have hangovers!)?

The other longer term health bits will come but having downloaded the?reframe app ?and acknowledged some of the pretty nasty stuff booze does to us, I’m happy that my internal organs and brain are thanking me.?Even if our local pizza place isn’t!

5.?Doing new stuff is fun.

Activities that don’t involve going to the pub. Who knew! From walking in the meadows daily, to personal training, to finding our local National Trust to open water swimming in the Ashdown Forest, we’ve tried so many different things over the past month. I know that at least one of these would get cancelled due to hangovers, lethargy, anxiety etc. but enjoying the summer and the area we live in, in a different way has been a huge shift, and long may that continue!

So final learnings from me.?

1.????Wine does not taste good without alcohol.?

As above, beer and gin alternatives are spot on but wine and fizz just don’t work without the alcohol. Save your money and take it from me that unless you are partial to grape juice, try the others first.

2.?????It is still difficult to be a non-drinker in the events Industry.

There is a small change occurring, and I’m delighted to be observing this but we have a long way to go in the events world to address this situation.

At a recent event, when asked why I didn’t want an alcoholic drink, I had to say no I wasn’t pregnant, no I didn’t have an illness, I simply didn’t want to drink alcohol.?

The need to make an excuse and for people to be shocked you aren’t boozing isn’t cool and is definitely not inclusive. An individual also left me “hanging” when I politely declined a glass of (most likely cheap and nasty) wine, they went off to “find me a drink” and didn’t come back!?

There is a lack of non-alcoholic drinks at events still. It is still something we seem to be sheepishly asking for rather than having them proudly displayed. The infamous drinks tray at large events is still filled with wine, prosecco and either water/juice if we are lucky.??

For you brilliant venues out there who are serving a broader range of drinks other than the water/orange juice and one sweet and sugary mocktail, please can you build a non-alcoholic bar so we don’t have to queue with number 3 people (above)??????and maybe it would make non-drinkers feel a little more included at the event?

I finish off by saying I drafted this shortly before my first glass of something gorgeously fizzy and English, which I thoroughly enjoyed so I am definitely not waxing on like an evangelist!?

However, I have re wired my relationship with what is, in all honesty, a toxin, and whilst I won’t be giving up my glass of?Squerryes ?on a Friday after work, nor the glass of something red with my Sunday roast,??I am certain now that enjoying life in moderation is definitely the route to a healthier, happier, more productive me.