What are your passions outside work ?

As some of you may know (and see had to endure on Facebook) I had to drop out of a conference booking recently and take part by video. The first time I've dropped out like that. But there was a good reason - the chance for "petrol heads" to converge on Rome for a fine weekend of Castrol oil and spanners! And of fine dining and new friends. For fellow petrol heads or anyone thinking of getting an old car, here's the story of driving to Rome in back in our 1937 charabanc.....

Smiling all the way to Rome and back 

How’s your spontaneity quotient? One Saturday morning we saw a piece about the Rome rally in a club magazine and immediately said yes all on a Saturday morning just 5 weeks before the event. Only later in the day did we think about getting Little Ethel to Rome! We’ve done some continental runs before, to Normandy and the Loire, but then Rome is a lot further and there are some alps in the way !

Little Ethel is a 25/30 touring saloon which coach builders Hooper built for the Geneva Motor Show in 1937. She’s marked up in kilometres and litres as well as imperial measures, denoting the intent to be used on the continent. 

Preparation or panic !

So what to prepare ! Well first Ethel went in for a thorough check over. She was tuned and set up so she purred and even pulled up the hills. Positively frisky! Grease in the steering box, took out some of the slack in the steering, such that on the first day I could relax and grin all the way to Reims. I already had a a few spares and used bits, and ordered an extra inner tube to carry, more oil, an up to date map book. A ￡7 stick-on-your-windscreen device for the phone proved great value in being able to see the sat nav and take photos. And a small battery back up was essential as the iPhone lasts only hours when running the satnav. I didn’t want to connect any latter day devices to the electrics but perhaps someone can advise on the merits?

So the boot was looking rather full before we started to think about luggage such as black tie and long dresses for the lovely events laid on. Siobhan restricted herself to 7 pairs of shoes to choose from, but there was a car full. No hitchhikers then! 

Second the route! How far? Somehow 1844km sounds no better than 1145 miles. 20 hours driving in a modern car….that might take a while in Little Ethel even though she’s happy at motorway speeds. 100km/hour is an ideal speed given she has a modern overdrive which previous owner Brian Fidler had fitted. It means wind noise and resistance and engine revs are just bearable. It avoids trading too many places with lorries which run at that same speed.

But would the driver survive as easily ? I planned on a couple of weeks there and back but Siobhan, my wife, was going to have to fly in and out for the fun and games in Rome, as were our French friends, @josephkort and MarieT, coming from Paris. Various work appointments could be moved and two speaking events were kept by webinar and pre-recoded video. Laptop and phone means work could continue to a reasonable degree. 

Via Francigena

My first instinct was to look at the shortest route. I imagined Alfred the Great, and many pilgrims since then, worked out the shortest route to walk from Canterbury to Rome. The Via Francigena is in fact well marked and tracked online. Indeed as I write this there is even a TV programme running on the BBC about it. Combining this with advice from various friends who live in France, Switzerland or Italy, I aimed to take the French N roads down to Lausanne and then aim for the “easiest” pass, down the Sion Valley to Simplon, then down Lake Maggiore. And then follow the Via Francigena, although the Mille Miglia route caught may eye too! 

As they say, the best plan doesn’t survive contact with the enemy. The enemy quickly revealed itself as I headed out of the tunnel on March 29th, a carefully chosen date, having paid the equivalent of one year’s membership of the EU for a photo and an international driving licence. The sat nav on my phone ! It kept battling to get me onto motorways, cunningly resetting itself to faster routes when I wasn’t looking !  

So I followed the satnav autoroute towards my first stop in Reims, getting off to drive through Laon and take the N roads into Reims, and which I then followed down through France and into Lausanne.

Day 2 from Reims to Lausanne was an absolute joy. The N roads were empty, sweeping or straight, easily coping with 100km/hr, not too many roundabouts or villages. The route through Chalons, St Dizier, Chaumont, Langrès, Gray, Besan?on and Pontarlier was fabulous and worth the drive in its own right. I stopped for a typical country lunch at a roadside photo opportunity at Chateau Champlitte.

Secure parking is a priority

Finding hotels with secure parking was always a priority. TripAdvisor was helpful but not always accurate unless you could get into the comments to see what kind of “secure” it was. In Reims I’d booked ahead. A simple Mercure hotel with underground car park which was perfect. But when road tripping, sometimes you want to turn right instead of left. Sometimes you want to carry on or stay in a place you’ve discovered. So I aimed to book mid afternoon for each night. Not ideal if you have children or dogs but easy on a lone run. And of course you get great last minute deals out of season.

Lausanne was one such hotel with an amazing view over Lake Geneva and a secure underground parking, where nothing was too much trouble. The grand surroundings of the Hotel de la Prix were reflected in the level of care with Ethel as she was put to bed but with a potential glitch. Driving into Lausanne, the ignition light had come on. A few taps here and there had not resolved it, so I relaxed over some fabulous pasta and slept on it. The next day, the problem was still there, so when all else fails, read the manual. The 25/30 manual is a joy in its detail, and the troubleshooting page solved the problem within 2 minutes. The fuses were all intact but the shunt in the fusebox needed a gentle tap and the problem was cleared and didn’t come back.

So we proceeded…. with a concierge walking ahead of the car, out the in route and stopping the traffic. Wish I’d had a flag for him for the photo !

There are things an 82 year old lady shouldn't be asked to do...

So day 3 brought the Alps. I followed the flat Sion Valley, some 100km or so east, to the Simplon pass rather than take the St Bernard as per the Via Francigena. Determined to drive all the way, I bypassed the signs to the train under the alps and started on the pass. Well there are things an 82 year old lady shouldn’t be asked to do and this was one of them. I don’t like overrevving and despite swallowing all the motorway hills easily, after a few kilmotres I was already using 3rd gear and chugging along. So I stopped and rested her [photo]. With only a mild feeling of panic I returned down the hill, thankful the brakes were in good form, watching the water temperature recover. 

The train from Brig to Iselle on the Italian border was like a toy version of a Eurotunnel freight wagon, just wide enough for a car, and just wide narrow enough for a tiny tunnel, 20kms long in the dark. But a lot more efficient drive on, drive off experience.

So we made it to Italy with time to spare and, with the Mille Miglia in mind, I veered off course to see Brescia. Another lovely last minute booking put me inside a religious conference centre, Centro Paulo VI, in the centre of town [photo], complete with secure gated car park. Wherever I stopped I went for a run to recce the town and stretch the legs. Brescia was heaving with people enjoying their Sunday evening ambulations and proved to be a joy on the food front too. 

The Mille Miglia

But back to my cell to plan for the reversed Mille Miglia route to Rome through Sienna. I plotted minor towns into the satnav but gave up the route after lunch in Cremona, famous for Stradivarius and his instruments. The constant “intelligence” of the satnav rerouting me and the pot holes. Kent has wheel breaking potholes, but SS roads in Italy takes the prize. I couldn't bear to hear the old lady's knees creaking at every bounce and got back on the autostrade, turning south to La Spezia determined to see a bit of Tuscany regardless.

I found another very good hotel deal online at Colle di Val d’Elsa at the Hotel Palazzo San Lorenzo which I knew of old. After a fight with the satnav around Livorno and Pisa I eventually got onto some smoother back roads up through the Tuscan hills to Volterra where the Satnav told me I was at the hotel. Wrong! But I didn’t mind as I was so enjoying throwing Ethel around, she was flying like a teenager. I had never realised she could go that bit quicker on the tighter bends, always fearing understeer. And she had so much smooth torque, she was picking up speed uphill. The other drivers, waving and peeping as they went by, were surprised to see me keep up with them.

Grinning, tooting and chatting are the great joys of a road trip in an old car

Grinning, tooting and chatting are the great joys of these road trips in an old lady. Cars slowing down to get pictures, people approaching at every stop for a chat. Kids sitting in to have their picture taken. Endless photographs and selfies from every angle. You can come to take your car forgranted, but people remind you how lucky you are, how special it is to be the temporary custodian of these senior citizens. How special the Rolls-Royce Spirit of Ecstasy, or Spirit of Ethel as my youngest daughter Beth pronounced it, giving our first proper car Big Ethel her name. It makes people smile with generous praise. “Bellisima” was a constant call.

There are too many conversations to document, but for example, ironically, there was wild cheering from the Gilets Jaunes as I tooted their demonstration outside Besan?on. Or at a stop by Langrès, chatting with Salim and his son who was mad about cars, closely followed by a Gendarme who’d seen us out of his window and come to take photos. Every traffic light is a chorus of smiles and questions. Giving a lift into Rome to two Irish strangers Siobhan had met on the plane - she hadn’t warned them about the car! One of my favourite games is to look serious if someone touches the paintwork and demand they clean it - easily done because I mean it! I hand them the cloth whilst winking at their friends or relatives who wet themselves laughing whilst catching the moment on their phones, until the victim realises ! 

And so, a rest day was required in Colle Val d’Elsa to recover from a traumatic arrival in which the satnav tried to get me to drive off the battlements at the end a narrow, one way, dead end street ! And the car park turned out not to exist so Little Ethel was parked on the street. This was somewhat tempered when I saw a sign showing the street was the Via Francigena and I was back on track by complete accident!! 

Arrivo in Roma

And then to Rome, giving up on the SS potholes after Siena, we made easy autostrada progress to the Majestic Hotel on the Via Veneto - wow what a place. Bruno the doorman helped me park up and it was evident they were expecting old cars and were ready with Royce levels of attention to detail.

I’ll leave out the detail of the next few days in Rome, staying at the rightly named Hotel Majestic but I will highlight a couple of things. We felt like we were living in a film set. It was spectacular. We were virgin rally goers and somewhat nervous about what it entailed. But from the outset we felt welcomed into a very international group. Suffice to say we are now honorary members of the Italian section of the club! We loved the mixture of languages, alternative perceptions, humour and conversations and we hope to stay in touch with many new friends. And we must thank them for their gentle treatment of the one Brit ( my wife is Irish ) at a sensitive time ! 

Arrivederci Roma

Too soon it was time to return. Up the coast route to Genoa and a first stop north of there at Alessandria. Day 2 via Simplon and lunch in Montreux, onward to Besan?on and surely the worst Ibis hotel ever. My trip advisor write up was “ The best thing I can say is the carpets aren’t a sticky as they look! “. The stay was rescued by a secure car park under the station and a night of European football with the locals in the bar next door (and City getting beaten by Spurs!). And with 400 miles remaining the question was to take 3 days or 4. Ethel was happy but I needed an easier run so I stopped in Epernay at a delightful B&B. Right next door to Chateau Pierry where Monsieur Gobilliard makes delightful champagnes. We’d been and bought wine there before, 22 years ago and 11 years ago. The final day involved an amazing cross country drive to the old Reims-Gueux circuit for a photo shoot and more chats with petrol-heads there on the same pilgrimage. Then the flog up the autoroute into the queue at the tunnel. Less said the better about the UK border guard blaming the French who had waved everyone straight through.

After the final hour home, the mileometer showed Little Ethel and I had completed 2840 miles in all. And apart from the ignition light and having to break in to rescue my car key on arrival in Rome ( thanks for the help Giuseppe !), all trouble free and greatly enjoyable. These pre war cars were made to be continental travellers after all. 

Plan for your spontaneity!

So I’d recommend spontaneity in your decision making when you see an old jalopy in the garage window or read about a car club rally. Here's to good preparation and a better satnav than mine - ideally your Mr or Mrs with a map!