Escaping Your Fear by Moving Through Your Fear | Dr. David Adams

Most of us can identify a certain fear that cripples us. Do you have a fear of public speaking (Glassophobia)? A fear of flying (Pteromerhanophobia)? A fear of being in a tight space (Claustrophobia)? Fear of germs (Mysophobia)? Fear of spiders (Arachnophobia)? Fear of heights (Acrophobia)? Or one of my favorites....a fear of fear (Phobophobia)?

 Overcoming fear does not usually happen automatically. It takes work. It is a skill that can be learned. There are certain things that you can do to help you in your fears. Here is the hard part. In order to get beyond our fear, we must face our fears! We must expose ourselves to the fear. The key is that you must move THROUGH your fear (and not around your fear) in order to escape fear. And this is hard work! Here are a few tips for you.

 1. Stop Avoiding your fear!!!! If we have a fear of something (such as spiders), we often try to avoid anything that resembles a spider. However, the avoidance maintains your fear/phobia. Instead, force yourself to embrace and face your fear. Look at pictures of spiders and gradually allow yourself to be closer to spiders. By the way, you are likely no more than 6 feet away from a spider? Are you nervous now? :) Or did I just create a fear for you?

 There is a behavioral technique called systematic desensitization which helps people to relax and systematically increase the stimulus which causes fear. For example, if you have a fear of airplanes, one is taught to relax by looking at toy airplane, then to relax by watching a plane fly in the sky, then by going to an airport, etc. Ideally, this should be done with a trained and experienced behavioral therapist.

 2. Gratitude- Try to change your fear to gratitude. Do you have a fear of public speaking? Perhaps, you can thank God for your opportunity to communicate to others. After all, there are people who are willing to listen to you, so be thankful for that.

 3. Journaling- Some people find it helpful to journal about their fears.

 4. Don’t do it alone! Talk to others about their fears and have others help keep you accountable. Ask someone to help you walk through them. It can be fun to celebrate with others when you make small steps and gains in walking through your fear.

4. Move from negativity to positivity. When you think about your fears, you are likely thinking in negative terms. Try to think about something positive in relationship to your fear. If you have a fear of public speaking, imagine yourself as being wildly successful at it!

5. Prayer and Surrender- When we have a fear, we often try to control things on our own. It can be a wonderful release to surrender yourself to the divine! Pray and ask God to help you through your fears. When you pray, you trust, and trust is incompatible with fear. Isaiah 41:13 says, “For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, ‘Do not fear, I will help you’”

6. Learn to live “in the moment” and embrace it. Rather than playing those silly “What if” games. The “what if” games only maintain our fears and anxieties. As you learn to “live in the moment”, you embrace life in the “here and now” rather than letting your mind wander to those things that tend to cripple us.

7. If you do decide to think about your fear in a negative way, exaggerate the worst case scenario. Think about the worst thing that can happen in your fear and then exaggerate it in a fun way. If you have a fear of public speaking, the worst thing that can happen is that you would walk out on stage and everyone would “boo” you. You freeze and then notice that you forgot your shoes. You walk off the stage to get your shoes and people start to through eggs at you. Really? Would that really happen? Laugh at it, and have fun with it.

It can be quite liberating to overcome your fears. I hope you will consider acting now! The longer you wait, the harder it will become. Take the first step to move Through your fear. You can do it!

I am interested in hearing how you have overcome a certain fear of yours? How did you manage. Please share with me on my blog at www.drdavidadams.com