EPIC Tales vs Fairy Tales-Experience Based Learning

Epic adjective Also ep-I-cal [ep-i-kuhl].

1. Noting or pertaining to a long poetic composition, usually centered upon a hero, in which a series of great achievements or events is narrated in elevated style: Homer's Iliad is an epic poem.
2. Resembling or suggesting such poetry: an epic novel on the founding of the country.
3. Heroic; majestic; impressively great: the epic events of the war.

Adverb Slang. very; extremely: That's an epic life!

Noun plural noun: fairy tales

1. A children's story about magical and imaginary beings and lands.
2. Something resembling a fairy tale in being magical, idealized, or extremely happy.
3. Modifier noun: fairy-tale - a fabricated story, especially one intended to deceive.
4. Slang. Top down business planning: Great plan!

A Confusing Start

My EPIC tale began as a series of fairy tales. Without business school training, infatuated with the emerging startup world, coming out of college in 1980 (still the worst recession and job market), desiring to make a lot of money, and believing I could do that, have a life, a wife, and a family, I set out upon my merry way. I encountered early startups that didn’t make payroll, spent 200+ nights of the year on the road to move up the ranks, became COO of a Fortune 200 company where I didn’t care for the core business to get rich, worked for a VC that made me understand that was not entrepreneurship, and finally went home to take stock of my life. These experiences all left something to be desired.

All the Beds Were Not Right

None of these beds were just right and I had gone past the allotted 3 beds. I took some time, much longer than ever before, to become a full-time member of my own family. I realized all the little things that I missed on a day-to-day basis. I began unpacking my experiences to see how I could be a dad/husband, make a living, maintain real friendships, and have time for myself. This was not for the meek as many around me advised that this was the fairy tale. I knew my EPIC tale was yet to come. Balance isn’t a destination; it’s a feeling. The only way to find your way is to know how it feels when it's right.

The Best Laid Plans

All of our lives are comprised of a series of epic tales, created by a constant array of random and planned experiences. How many of them truly create the courage to do better each and every time? We filter out and over/underemphasize our experiences and the lessons thereof until we have faced the same or a similar scenario again. Most frustratingly, we fail to muster up the courage and summon the tools required to change and repeat the same mistake over again. As members of teams at work, we must understand our own and the group’s collective wisdom as the space we mutually inhabit.

Shorten the Learning Curve

Your epic journey is an equation that requires your inputs and acknowledgment of your (E)xperiences, (P)erspectives, (i2)nights/innovation, and (C)ourage required to shape your story and the desired outcomes. All our lives are the sum total of all our unique experiences, good, bad, and indifferent. The best way to learn, and hopefully achieve some degree of wisdom, is by remembering all of them, not the selective perception we are guilty of at times.

Experience Matters

How many of us are repeat offenders experiencing life with the same pain, no gain, same place, same story, same outcome? Whether we forgot, chose to forget, or chose to ignore the lessons learned, we marched forward without the wisdom of having been there before. We tend to remember highs and lows, yet life most often occurs in between. Capturing the wisdom of your life requires discipline, reflection, and review. If you want a different outcome, create a new path, and if you want a new path, remember the old one.

Feelings Count

Do we ask ourselves how experiences made us feel? Trying to remember our own feelings long after they occur is an impossible task. Capturing our feelings allows us perspective of our experiences and begins to create a base for improvement. Most all of us have learned not to repeatedly bang our head on the open kitchen cabinet because it hurts. How often do we fail to learn from our experience and perspective in life and at work? Plotting a new path, without the examination of our perspectives and feelings, is a wasted life lesson.

Lessons Learned, Innovation Required

It begins with the distillation and documentation of our insights. What did that experience and perspective teach us about ourselves, others, the situation, the community? If we are honest with ourselves, we can apply how certain experiences feel, along with what we have learned, to begin to change how we react in the future. If success in life is partially dependent on repetition, then forgetting the lessons learned through repetition is like playing a game without reading the instructions. If we had the chance to do it over, how would we innovate for a better outcome?

Courage is King

That little voice in your head is telling you it’s time for a change. “I think I can, I think I can” required a track and an engine to succeed. The desire to do better is not enough; this requires honesty and courage. This requires a plan, an accountability partner and discipline. Controlling the narrative on the EPIC story of our lives creates outcomes only limited by our imaginations.