Entrepreneurial Challenge: Leading with Empathy

We are facing critical and unprecedented times in business. Leaders are in a default position to manage the anxieties and mental health of their workforce. Yes, referring the workforce members to counselling or perhaps hiring an HR or counselling company to assist is wise, but they are not a replacement for the relationship leaders have with their workforce members. Workforce members want to know that leadership understands and is on their side; then they will commit, recommit and trust their leaders.

The key is to continuously increase our own awareness of those things we least want to know about ourselves. In order to lead with empathy, leaders must first understand their own values and behaviours. After all, if they don't understand themselves, how can they understand others?

We need to make the environment truly safe and transparent. Employees must be able to bring concerns forward without the fear of retribution. Leaders ARE the example. If you want someone to work hard, show HOW to work hard. If you want your employees to be open and honest, YOU must reflect this behaviour and build the culture, policies and procedures to support this.

It's tough to lead effectively if you don't:

1. Have a clear understanding of yourself.
2. Have a roadmap to understand others.

Rules for Practicing Empathy

1. You must first examine yourself. If you do not truly want to understand others, if ou are insincere, empathy will not work;
2. Communication is more than words. You must be sensitive to times when expressed thoughts and feelings are not congruent. You must read the nonverbal signals as well as the verbal ones;
3. Do not react too quickly to inaccurate statements of fact; listen carefully for the feelings beneath the statement before rushing in to correct facts;
4. You must allow the person to tell the emotional truth, which may include negative feelings about you. You must be ready to openly explore such negative feedback;
5. Use reflective listening.

Johari Window - A Tool?

The Johari window (Luft and Ingham, 1955), is based on 4 quadrants. The sizes of the quadrants change over time as the relationship develops as shown in the visual header. It's important to remember that the perimeter doesn't change in size and when a quadrant grows or shrinks, it impacts the size of other quadrants.

Quadrant A (Upper Left): represents the values, motives and behaviours that are known to oneself and to others.

Quadrant B (Upper Right): represents the values, motives and behaviours that are seen by others but are not recognized by you.

Quadrant C (Lower Left): represents the values, motives and behaviours that you know but DO NOT reveal to others.

Quadrant D (Lower Right): represents the values, motives and behaviours which neither you nor others are yet aware. They exist but no one has yet observed them r their impact on the relationship.

In a new relationship, Quadrant A is small. With growing trust, we feel less need to hide the things we value, feel and know so as A grows, Quadrant C begins to shrink proportionally. It takes longer for Quadrant B to shrink in size because it requires a dedicated openness to honest feedback. If you challenge someone on their blind spots, they typically feel defensive and use a variety of behaviours to close off feedback. Quadrant 4 tends to change the slowest of all yet is typically the large and very influential to our behaviours.

This leads us to WHY ... Why is it important, as a leader, to understand the Johari model - how does it apply to you as a leader?

The Johari window helps us learn and understand empathy through awareness: Personal and Others. We know if we challenge a person based on quadrants B, C and D it generally results in defensiveness, rejection and mistrust. To counter this, a leader must model behaviours of sensitivity, openness and learning.