Ending Loneliness: One Pocket At A Time
There are pockets of loneliness all around us.
Cities, filled with transplants, temporary residents, disconnected.
Workplaces, thousands sitting next to each other grinding away, earphones in, no conversations or meaningful friendships.
Elderly communities, friends lost over time, slowly fading away, uncertain of relevance in a rapidly changing world.
High schools, so many others, yet feeling not enough, unheard, in a relentless cycle of comparison.
Loneliness manifests in so many forms. Feeling left out. Not feeling understood. Not being able to communicate to be understood by others. Lacking intimacy. Feeling isolated. Not having people to talk to. Having people to talk to, but not about the things that actually matter. Missing a community. Missing having a purpose. Feeling lonely, when around others. Feeling lonely, when by yourself.
Loneliness hurts people in so many ways. It causes greater risk of early death (45%), a massive increase in risk of functional decline (60%); it’s linked to addiction, depression.
What do cognitive decline, suicides, and violent extremism all have in common? Loneliness is a leading cause of all 3.
Loneliness is an epidemic. 1 in 2 Americans report feeling alone or left out. 1 in 4 are rarely or never understood. 2 in 5 say their relationships are not meaningful and they’re isolated from others. 1 in 5 say they rarely or never feel close to people. (Source: 2019 Cigna Study on Loneliness)
Loneliness is complicated. It takes many forms, it finds many ways to hurt. It’s systemic, with no easy solution. It’s not going to be easy to end, because there are lots of causes. A systemic problem takes a holistic solution. The creation of new habits, collective practices, across communities and generations to cement behavioral change on a societal level.
With such a giant challenge, where do we start? I think we start at the beginning. Eliminating pockets of loneliness, one at a time. A grassroots movement. I've been seeing of late beautiful examples of online communities and experimental live gatherings that are strengthening the broken fabric of our society. There's a movement emerging. I think in experimenting with pockets of loneliness, we’ll find the answer to how to end loneliness for all — while ending loneliness for real people, real time.
Reach out if this if you've been experimenting with ending loneliness in your own communities - I'd love to aggregate best practices so we can share out widely to all.
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More stats / reading:
- Holt-Lunstad’s research shows that being disconnected poses comparable danger to smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and is more predictive of early death than the effects of air pollution or physical inactivity. https://journals.plos.org/plosmedicine/article?id=10.1371/journal.pmed.1000316
- "Vivek Murthy, the former US surgeon general, has declared loneliness an “epidemic,” noting that it was dangerous both in its own right and because of its links to deep societal problems such as addiction and violence: “It’s prevalent, it’s common, and the studies Julianne [Holt-Lunstad] and others have done have shown a robust association with illnesses that we actually care about, including heart disease, dementia, depression and anxiety, and very importantly, longevity.” https://qz.com/1591563/the-danish-have-designed-a-simple-way-to-cope-with-loneliness/
- “The opposite of addiction is not sobriety,” she says. “The opposite of addiction is genuine, meaningful interactions and authentic connections and experiences with ourselves, each other, and the world around us.” https://qz.com/1693268/a-new-kind-of-rehab-uses-human-connection-to-treat-addiction/
Artist: Musical, Martial, Mystical at jMauriceTorres
4 年?????????????
Freelance design thinking strategist, facilitator and aspiring entrepreneur with a background in product management and theatre
5 年Diana Rau?This piece resonates so much with me on a personal level and the work I'm currently doing in bringing e180's vision of community-building through mini knowledge-sharing events. Thank you for sharing. Hope to see you!???
Brick by brick
5 年Sounds like a topic for our next discussion!
Veteran, Business Owner, All around OK guy.
5 年Maintaining a group of friends that have an understanding of your events and experiences. They don't need to be like minded, but it's important that, when speaking of an experience, they can understand how that experience could effect you in a negative or positive way. Part of why its hard for veterans to make their way back into the civilian world is that experiences often are not shared and not understood. We often set out into a world where few have shared our experiences, and it becomes harder to relate to one another, often leading to loneliness. I keep close friendships with those I served with, and close friendships with those I didn't serve with. For the latter, I am very open about my days in the military. I speak of the good and the bad so they may one day understand and look to relate it to experiences in their own life. This builds stronger friendships.