End Chapter - Death

It is a privilege to grow old; I mean life could have ended so much earlier. When I, as a six year old, was driving with my mother in a small VW to M?klinta and a car overtook us, as my mother made a turn, sending us crashing into the ditch; or the T-bone crash in Borl?nge when a car went right in to my hip and I was only sawed by the beam inbetween the front and back door and I was brought to Falun Hospital, temporarily paralyzed from the hip down.

The time when we, your mother and I, were close to be slaughtered as Easter lambs in Australia after hitching a lift with a devil worshipper. Or the three close death calls within 10 days in the car when I drove through a stop sign at 90 km/ h by mistake in Sm?land on my way to Stockholm before catching a flight to China. Just to be close to burn down a hotel in Shanghai and then only to luckily escape on a flight to Korea just to be hit by a log on the motorway south of Seoul going at 140 km/h. I guess there is something correct in the Swedish saying “All bad things come in three”

Or the time I was in South Africa and forgot to confirm my flight back to Europe - if I had not been able to talk my way into a seat (one employee gave up her seat), I would have been on the next flight that was hit by lightning over the coastline of Morocco and had to make an emergency landing in Nice Life is fragile. Many events in my life could have changed my path or even ended my life much earlier.

I guess the trick is not to die and especially not while you are waiting for the good life. A friend to the family, a baker that worked day and night always said that he and his wife will start to live their life when they get their pension, just to experience her death a few days after he got his pension and he suffered a seazure to be paralyzed a few moths thereafter. Try to live your life fully and enjoy all the small tings you see and experience. Suddenly life changes and the opportunities you had are gone, maybe replaced by others.

When my father died, even though I did not spend much time with him for his last twenty years, I suddenly felt ... alone. My thoughts went almost simultaneously to you my children and I felt very sad and happy at the same time. Life all comes down to a few moments…this was one of them.

Say my name and I shall live

-Tut-ankh-amon-

When I die I hope it could be said that I gave it my best shot … and that I am forgiven for being such a stubborn-proud-primadonna-pain-in-the-ass that I am. But my guess is that Simon will proudly take over that flag!

That man is a success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who leaves the world better than he found it whether by a perfect poem or a rescued soul; who never lacked appreciation of earth's beauty or failed to express it; who looked for the best in others and gave the best he had.

 -Robert Louis Stevenson-

Maybe you will remember me fixing truffle and eggs with my fantastic bacon on a Sunday morning for you and your friends, surprising you late in the evening with a gourmet dessert when you were playing computer games or white river rafting together in the jungle of Costa Rica or when I by mistake throw away the bag with the ski boots and brought the garbage bag to the airport as we where going skiing or maybe when I took that fall in the children’s slope in St Anton and went through the plank next to the lift or the proud moment when you first out-skied me and I was surprised to find out that you had already passed me as I was looking up the hill for you. See me sliding in the door with a big glass of red wine in one hand and a big cigar in the other, laughing and enjoying life. A man with some insight and knowing the difference between Chronos and Kairos time.

So guys: Live, as you will wish to have lived. This is not the end. It’s not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.

Doctor: I have some good news and some bad news

Patient: What’s the good news?

Doctor: The test you took showed that you have twenty-four hours to live.

Patient: That’s the good news??? … What is the bad news?

Doctor: I forgot to tell you yesterday

But I ... I intend to live forever …or die trying

And so castles made of sand slip into the sea, eventually…

-Jimi Hendrix -