EMPTY GLORY IS COSTING ME TOO DEAR

I have inadvertently got myself into a situation where I am going to be spending time in company when I would rather be alone. Of itself this is not unusual and, for the most part, I am happy to have been dragged out - once I get there. But I have never been one to look forward to any party with anything approaching joy in my heart. I am, sadly, anti-social and - unlike most other CEOs of my acquaintance – I have a positive loathing of networking. I like my friends in penny numbers and would prefer my well-wishers to send a postcard.

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And that is how I have found myself in this present muddle.

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I was sitting quietly drawing some watercolour cards so I can keep in touch with my inner circle [they are my outer circle too if truth be told as I’ve not my brother’s breezy ability to collect chums at every turn]. Now, drawing tends to attract people like honey gathers bears. So, soon although I am, while not exactly talentless, certainly not greatly accomplished either - someone came and commented on what I was doing. Without thinking I gave them a completed picture. One thing led to another and, before I knew it, I was being asked to reproduce a view for someone else. Let’s be clear: I am not an artist. So, I should have said no. Instead, I was flattered so I gave it a try. It wasn’t too bad and now they have invited me out for dinner. They are being kind and generous. I feel – in the much-loathed and nerve-jangling run up to any outing – that I have been sentenced to an evening in a cage with the very marauding bears I mentioned.

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So, I watched the Jubilee celebrations last weekend with a mixture of fascination and amazement. I simply cannot imagine how you can live out a life, wreathed in smiles and good humour, with the whole world watching on. I can well see how acting opposite a CGI image of Paddington – and God bless Michael Bond for his more friendly creature from Darkest Peru - would have been the easier gig.

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And what an example of service and sacrifice The Queen’s reign has been.

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Most of us try our best. We are diligent and take time and care at work. We nurture friendships and families. But none of us has had to do it every day for life. Her Majesty’s commitment is unique. And it is not just because she was not-quite-born to the role. She could have done it badly – we have had plenty of monarchs who have. She could have been aloof. But she’s not done that either. Instead, she has done her best – as she promised to do. And now others are helping her carry on with as much as she is able.

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I think we ought all to be helping each other out. And, like the eponymous bear, I think the world would be a much better place if we were all a little kinder. I know I have said this before but I do not think the world goes round more sweetly on its axis when we are driven by fear and loathing. I don’t even think it makes the bullies feel better. Misery – as they say – likes its own company.

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Respect is a flower that needs to be cultivated – but not necessarily a gift expected in return. I think too often experts impose their expertise on others. I see it all the time: instead of listening to the other person – be they a friend, a colleague or a client – we tell them what to do without listening to what they want or taking time to understand where they are trying to go. We often expect them to do, unquestioningly, what we want. And far too often we don’t bother to explain any of it at all.

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In short, we expect respect. But we have not shown respect.

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And sometimes this means we get what we deserve. It may be the dressing down our high-handed actions warranted. Or we way lose a friend or business deal without ever understanding why. So, instead, let us walk in the footsteps of Elizabeth II and concentrate on others, the journey we are on and the responsibilities we have. And let the respect we crave come naturally from the lives we live.