The Empathy Pill for Salespeople

This is a quality that needs tomes of writing and hours of coaching and training. Somehow Empathy gets closely linked with Sympathy. The difference cannot be emphasized enough. Empathy is the process of suspending one's feelings and assumptions and getting into (almost) the body of the other person and experiencing his / her feelings and emotions as s/he does.

Clearly a very hard thing to accomplish. Nature automatically puts empathy into mothers for example. Many homemakers and caregivers are naturally empathetic. Along with mothers they are able to sense and anticipate the needs of the people around them and in their care, and plan for actions in run time. In KG-speak this occurs because Nature has put a dollop of Padi Hai into them and when you operate from a base of Padi Hai, then empathy is one of the natural outcomes.

In work life, empathy occurs in the small things and transactions. For example, do you anticipate how the person you have sent an email to, will be reading it?

• Attention span - with family? In a car? At the airport? In a review?
• Form factor - on the phone or tablet or laptop?
• Will the mail be opened at all? Is your subject line compelling and informative? Many a times with a CXO the entire content of the mail can be put in the subject line itself. No need to open the mail.
• Do you use short sentences and bullet points to convey what you wish and ask for action? Does s/he have to scroll up and down to read your full mail?
• Have you put in an unnecessary attachment when the message could have been a part of the mail body itself? Worse....have you zipped the attachment?
• Have you put the Conference Bridge PIN number in the Subject line? Or is it buried somewhere in the mail body?

There are so many more thoughtful ways of email communication that shows to the receiver that you care. Empathy arising out of PADI HAI.

In Enterprise Sales we always exhort the rainmakers to develop an ecosystem to support them in their efforts to sell. An ecosystem could consist of several constituents like OEM partners, Analysts, Third Party Advisors, Consultants, Trade Bodies / Associations, Industry publications. Media, Academia, Government and a few more. As a trusted advisor to one's clients, it is imperative that one develops more than a passing familiar relationship with executives at these firms. Such meetings that are intended to build longer term relationships do not yield immediate results. And with firms on the QoQ treadmill it is very easy to be swept away in the BBC wave. BBC = Booking, Billing & Collection.

Everyone at the top just wants to know your BBC and that becomes the primary, and in fact, the sole discussion during accountability meetings. What did you add to the pipeline? What deals did you close and hence the new invoices we can raise? And how much money has come into the bank? Frankly this is the essence of the business and there is no walking away from it. But to be consumed totally by it, will result in making "Jack a dull boy". If the expectation is that the salesperson has to become a trusted advisor to prospects and clients then it is mandatory for him / her to have deep relationships into this ecosystem to be able to make headway.

And to be able to build these relationships, one of the key qualities needed is EMPATHY. Empathy enables listening, empathy fans your curiosity to know more about the other person and ask open ended questions about him / her; empathy will lead you to anticipate what s/he may want and facilitate it. It will automatically make you a friend of the person and maybe a trusted advisor. And once a relationship starts to build, your network of the ecosystem starts to feed on each other and into you and enables you to add value to your client. You will automatically have a deeper understanding of the client's industry, the client's own firm and the person you are dealing with at the firm.

The INDIVIDUAL - FIRM - INDUSTRY axis strengthens your ability to be perceptive and discerning and you are then able to create a cogent and workable plan to connect with and advise your prospect / client. TRUSTED ADVISOR.

Not an easy task and given BBC pressures you need to earmark the time to do it. Having EMPATHY helps big time.

Finally, empathy (arising out of PADI HAI) also has its downsides. WHY ME all the time will plague you. Others may live off you, using your empathy. I am not saying you should allow yourself to be used. Be firm and know when to back off a bit. But having said this, being empathetic also gives you a sense of being on top. It is an opiate at many times and may be worth suffering a few of the leachers!!

Go ahead and be empathetic anyway!!

What is your personal experience with empathy in a selling role? Can you share examples of what worked and what did not? How do you think we can train sales people to be more empathetic?________________________________________________________________________

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