Empathy is like a muscle
Getrude Matshe
Founder DiversityConnector & HerStory Circle, FinTech & EduTech; DEI Consultant, Philanthropy Consultant, Podcaster. TEDx Speaking Coach. 3x TED speaker. Seeking Executive & Non-Executive Board Director opportunities.
Are humans the kings of the animal kingdom?
I believe we are. I believe every human being is born with an empathetic sense; it is hard-wired in our DNA; to care for each other and to look out for each other’s wellbeing. That is the condition of bring Human, in Africa we call it Ubuntu. That is why in very underdeveloped nations; you will find someone who has not got enough food to eat, sharing it with others in their community so that they both have a chance to survive. What I have observed in developed nations is that there is so much abundance; people do not have the shared experiences we have in underdeveloped nations. There are people in this world who have NEVER gone to bed without eating a meal or having water to drink. That is why they cannot put themselves into the shoes of a starving man, woman, or child. They just DO NOT know what it means to be hungry, and it is not their fault; just the circumstances of their place of birth. When I teach empathy in the corporate world as a diversity equity inclusion consultant; I have to find examples that people in western countries can relate to.
It shocked me to see people crying when a dog or cat died in the western countries and the value people put on their pets was almost like the love you experience if you have a child. I had to LEARN about the things people valued; a very different experience for me, an African woman born in a village with no electricity and running water; eating one meal a day if we were lucky. So empathy is like a muscle: it gets stronger. The more you use it and the more you use it, the stronger it gets. And we can teach it at any stage in a human being’s life because it is in our DNA to look out for each other. That is how we have survived and thrived in an animal kingdom where we are the slowest creatures on the planet; we cannot outrun the predators in the animal kingdom like cheaters, lions and leopards. We have survived because of our intellect and senses, like empathy that drive us to live together in villages, towns and cities; to care and look out for each other because there is strength in numbers.
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?Empathy, compassion, collaboration and connection are the super powers every human being possesses. We can learn empathy; we simply just need to remember.
#diversityandinclusion #empathy #Ubuntu
Spécialiste en stratégie marketing et commerciale | + 13 ans d'expérience | Formateur & Coach | J'applique mes compétences pour developper vos activités ou votre carrière professionnelle
3 年''So empathy is like a muscle: it gets stronger. The more you use it and the more you use it, the stronger it gets'' Correct. We need it to better appreciate others and learn how to keep going with them. Thanks for the article Getrude Matshe.
Artist, Writer, Architect
3 年Yes, empathy is inborn, we are born out of love and love is at the core of what relates. This inborn trait is often unlearned through non-compassionate education, may this familial or social. Empathy definitely, when practiced and reflected or meditated on grows. One could say like a muscle, one could also speak of a practice of the heart. We do not only think with our brain, sensitivity and thinking and acting with the heart is a very powerful thing, towards ourselves, others, for the community, culture, country and loved one. At the heart of Ubuntu: I am not without you, Buddha speaks of the connectedness of all, interbeing and Christianity speaks of 'N?chstenliebe', loving the one next to you. Empathy is at the heart of all religions, also Jewish and Moslem and Hindu. This 'I exist because of you' is a immanent setting in relation tp one another. It lies at the heart of humanism and humanity. A huge difference between African and European experiences of togetherness and Empathy Felwine Sarr analyzes very well in his Book 'Afrotopia', he compares for example Western Capitalism, Protestant Work Ethic and more to the Relational Economics of African Traditions. What emerges in the latter is a socialization of economics as opposed to the coldness and isolation of individuals in Western or European Capitalism. A very interesting and important read. Sarr's book adds greatly to this conversation. Closer to home, I feel Empathy can be taught and brought to kindergardens, schoolsand Universties, into companies and all facets of life. Its practice is so important. The more we practice it, the more emphatic we become. Totally agree. Looking forward to continuing the conversation. Thank you for your article! Brancusi: The Kiss
Communication, Sales & Conflict Resolution Trainer
3 年Hey @Gertrude Matshe thanks for tagging me in this. It's an interesting discussion. In your article you say empathy is "hard-wired in our DNA" and "we are born with it." I agree and to me, that makes it a character trait. Nonetheless, like any trait, we can develop it as we grow. What bothers me in the corporate world is insincere empathy... the kind that is deployed without caring for a person because a result needs to be obtained. As in, "I'm going to display empathy to the team so they warm to me and do what I say." When this type of functional empathy is displayed it fails because people can spot insincerity. A couple of the preceding comments indicate empathy can be taught. I agree. Many things can be taught. However teaching empathy is unlikely to guarantee it comes from a place of genuine concern for others. After all, teaching never guarantees learning.