Empathy for Gen Z: A Response to the Recent New York Times Article on Youth in the Workplace

Millennials — now is the time for us to be the leaders and bosses that we wished we'd had when we were 24. We play a critical role in the generational tug of war that has dominated corporate culture for decades. I say, "Let go of the rope! Stop pulling. Drop it!” That’s the freedom and the opportunity of this moment.?

Power dynamics and hierarchy are par for the course in corporate America, but only if we say so. As millennials rise in the ranks to become directors, senior directors, and beyond, the invitation is to lead with the empathy and wisdom that we wish had existed 10-15 years ago when we were paying our dues.?

Last week the New York Times published a piece titled, “The 37-Year-Olds Are Afraid of the 23-Year-Olds Who Work for Them.” As a 34 year old startup founder, I’ll admit that the title rings true. I was raised on 12 hour work days and grinding through work no matter the cost. For the large part, this strategy has paid off. But I have to admit, it was a brutal journey. As Gen Z calls for better work/life balance and embraces unabashed emotional expression at work, I have mixed feelings. My heart says “yes!” but my head screams “No. Effing. Way.”?

The first 5-7 years of my career were rough, to say the least. Jobs were scarce. The economy was stunted, and in NYC you essentially needed an Ivy League degree to snag an unpaid internship at a mediocre firm. I lived in a 400 square foot apartment with two friends — sharing a bunk bed in an 8x10 room while paying off $40,000 in student loans and trying to “tone down” my queerness to fit in better at work. I was plagued by frequent panic attacks and constant anxiety. I swore at the time that I’d never perpetuate that same struggle if/when I ever had the chance to call the shots. But here we are in 2021, and making the shift is harder than I’d imagined it would be. I want to break the cycle, but I’m not certain exactly how.??

What’s so hard about making the shift?

If you’re at all familiar with dysfunctional family dynamics (that’s all of us!), it’s easy to see how bad habits, patterns, and ways of operating get passed down from one generation to the next. Now imagine that corporate America is merely an extension of the very dynamics that many of us seek to break in our own personal lives. The difference is that when it comes to family, we tend to hire therapists, coaches, and healers of all types to help illuminate the path to freedom. This is not the case at work.?

Though we see the dysfunction, we tolerate and embrace it. We even perpetuate it because — after all — it’s what got us to where we are today. Ending the cycle takes a level of leadership and trust that is not for the faint of heart. It’s a deeply personal journey of letting go and choosing to believe in the people around you, rather than controlling them. For those of us raised on “work ethic,” and “sucking it up,” it can be hard to let go.?

My promise — not only to Gen Z, but to Millennials, Gen X and Boomers — is to let go and listen. In return, I’ll request the same from you. We shall see who answers the call.

Chris Donohoe is the co-founder of Uncommonly, a coaching and management consulting studio that improves how people work and experience change. For more, follow Uncommonly on LinkedIn >>