Emotions in the Workplace ??????

Do emotions belong in the workplace?

Well that would depend on which emotions we’re talking about. For all intents and purposes, are we talking about primary or secondary emotions? Negative and positive emotions? Good or bad emotions? What about happiness, is it quantifiable or merely subjective? Is there even an agreeable spectrum in which we can put emotions?

For instance, some people may see anger as a destructive emotion, while others may believe it is a motivating response. Some people believe that a carefree employee will be less productive than someone who is driven by their own perfectionism.

What’s the proper response if an employee or employer can’t control their emotions? More to the point, are any of these emotions justifiable in the workplace? Maybe this gives cadence to a bigger question—where do emotions belong in the grand scheme of an organization?

There are a lot of questions about emotions in the workplace, and because of the myriad of different perspectives people have, employees and employers’ reactions may run the gamut from letting things roll off their back to being utterly paralyzed with fear. Where do we start in forming good work relationships that go beyond the superficial? How does an organization create space to nurture the whole person?

If we were to look at the history of working relationships, it appears as if leaders, in general, have been trained to look at employees as a financial obligation or a replaceable commodity. Leaders may have been told, not to invest too much in their relationship with employees in case they had to lay them off or fire them. Those leaders tend to keep their emotions tight to their chest, muscle through downturns and layoffs, and do everything in their power to make sure it doesn’t become emotional. To them, fostering a deeper emotional bond more than an employer/employee connection may be considered extraneous. Consequently, this type of thinking is what might have led to the over-arching canned response we hear all the time,?it’s business, not personal. As a result, it’s likely that it?was?personal to the employee who lost their job and who is now expected to just pack up and leave without incident.

Not to say that?all?employers would only establish a superficial connection with employees, it comes down to the individual leaders and their desire to create deeper more meaningful relationships.

While some leaders may think they must motivate with fear and intimidation, other leaders may believe they ought to guide their employees with compassion and empathy. Although both evoke responses, it is the emotional reaction of the employees that can determine the depth and maturity of their relationships with their leaders and other people within that organization. It isn’t the employer’s responsibility to control the reaction of the employees, just as the employees can’t dictate how an employer should react. On the other hand, both could gain insight and empathy with one another when practicing active listening, demonstrating compassion, and working toward a more meaningful and respectful relationship.

Establishing an emotional maturity within an organization isn’t something that just happens. When leadership takes the initiative to establish deeper connections with their employees it has the possibility to create an environment for empathy, respect, and trust to grow. Emotional maturity has the capability to flourish when a mutual respect and understanding occurs between people who work together.

Lead by example isn’t just for the physical aspects of a role in the organization, it also applies to the emotional aspect of the role everyone plays within that organization, too.

Which leads us to this …

There are two completely opposite ends to the emotional spectrum in the workplace. At one end you have people who are highly emotional. They tend to wear their emotions on their sleeve 100% of the time, whether they are at work or home, and by golly they make it their job that everyone sees and reacts to their emotional state. On the other end of the spectrum, you have people who tend to bottle up their emotions most of the time and only let them out when they are far away from work or in the safety of their home. The real kicker—there doesn’t have to be a this-or-that mentality around emotions, the pendulum doesn’t have to swing one way or the other. But, in order to move toward emotional maturity within an organization it’s best to establish a balance between the two extremes.

When the majority of people within an organization feel safe to express their feelings, without being reprimanded, shut-down, judged, or shamed, the organization has the potential to advance toward an emotional maturity between its people. This may pave the way for each person to establish their own level of vulnerability within each relationship they choose to foster.

When people “tune into” the emotions of others, and become active participants in their relationships, it can lead to higher productivity, feelings of mutual validation, and a shared respect for where each person resides on their career path. When we let go of the impenetrable armor we put on before work and learn to embrace the idea that emotions are as natural to humans as breathing or walking, the potential for creating long-lasting meaningful relationships can grow by leaps and bounds. In fact, when relationships grow and produce authentic interactions, it gives us permission to be who we are and others permission to be who they are.

When we share our emotions in a constructive way, it gives us permission to be and stay open, it allows us to become vulnerable with people who have earned the right, and we learn to accept that we are all emotional beings navigating the world the best way we know how.