Emotions to expect and manage, as you start selling

When you usually want to jumpstart a project, sales is not the first battle you wish to take. You know it’s coming, but you defer it to the latest period in the future. To a period where you would ideally have something great to offer.

But then you realize that it’s a fear that will never go away, and that you need to tackle on this aspect of your project to really kick things off. Worry no more. In this article, I share with you the emotions to expect (and to manage), at 5 stages of the usual sales process.

Thick but human.

It was an intense long-hour call, in the afternoon.

I was hyped about my prospect' project and he was hyped too.

Everything seemed to go perfectly well. I was managing myself perfectly well, until, at the end of the call, the person told me they needed more time before finalizing their decision.

Although I'm thick in character, I'm also human, taking No's for my services is still harsh.

I told my coach to help me review my call with me, and as we went through it, I realize I made several mistakes in the ways I was managing my emotions during the call.

Now, this might not be the main reason why this prospect didn't land, but it played for a big portion.

The benefits of mastering sales skills

The benefits of having sales skills as a person provide multiple benefits, but the most important one is freedom and independence.

I said it numerous times. If you want more freedom and independence in your life, you need to master your sales skills.?

It will help you advance faster in your career (but ahem! let’s not pretend this is the only reason). In your side-business or project as well. Why? Because being good at selling opens up your creative mind and allows you to identify sources of value and riches everywhere.

I love to go in monasteries for self-retreats, and I have always been fascinated by the millions of ways even remote-religious communities create products and services to sell, from their interactions with nature.

The motto is simple: If you imagine it, it can sell.?

Now, it is not that easy. Usually all sorts of emotions arise, even for the most experienced ones. This is the reason why you have been pushing the launch of your project properly - scared to have to manage the sales' part of it. I did that too, so don’t worry. Spent approximately 3 years turning around Jirri, before I started going for clients. And even when I did, I was so bad at managing my emotions from this somehow demanding activity.

In the life insurance industry for example - one of the most brutal one for salespeople - just show how difficult selling can be when we do not manage emotions well. According to Investopedia , "more than 90% of new life insurance agents quit the business within the first year. The rate increases to greater than 95% when extended to five years. Rejection is a huge part of the job, and you must embrace it if you are to be successful. Many leads hang up the phone or shut the door in your face before you can even begin your pitch. If rejection gets under your skin or wears you down, life insurance sales may not be the right career for you."

So, seriously, if you are new in the game, what are some expectations you should expect and be prepared to manage ? Let's get right into it by looking at different parts of the sales process.

Emotions to expect and to manage at different parts of your sales process.

Sales typically involve a number of components, including but not limited to:

1. Prospecting: This involves identifying and reaching out to potential clients or leads. The emotions most clients share at this stage are tied in anticipation. Anticipatory emotions include fear, anxiety, hope and trust. So, a good mix of positive and negative emotions. You are not afraid to approach people (I mean, you shouldn’t if you’re 30 or over, right?). You feel highly motivated and you expect both Yes’es and Nos. So you’re more in anticipation, but at the same time, you still have a tiny small pinch of fear of rejection here, but it's nothing. I actually go in much details in a free brochure on how to get prepared for this stage effectively. Get it here.
2. Qualifying: This step of the sales process involves framing your leads to ensure that they would have the willingness and ability to purchase your services. This one also is an anticipatory phase, but more on the positive spectrum of the emotions, when you are already clear about your target market. Share with me your framing questions by DM, and I'll tell you what you should ask to get at the bottom of your real prospects quickly. However, a negative emotion that may come from here is the fear of rejection coming from our scarcity-mindset frenemy showing up, especially for the ones who do not have a clear target market and need the cash ASAP. The minute someone seems interested, you ignore this step because you want the money. This will raise your anxiety about a potential No and it will make you try and force the sale, by trying to convince the prospect. I’ve been there, done that, and I can tell you that you do NOT want to take this route.
3. Presenting: The third stage of a sales process is you presenting your offer. Once you have qualified a prospect, you then present your offer. This is where emotions tied to lack of self-confidence come in. Whether because your service is new, or whether because you have not have enough clients, lack of confidence can show up easily in your voice and appearance at this stage. Emotions such as shame or even guilt appear. Why? Because, when you want to say to someone: I want to help, but you will have to pay me for that, your ego and past experience get in the way. Especially in our community where we have been used to be nice and do everything for free. Controlling these emotions require practice, and that’s why I’ll always recommend working with a coach to help you put in place a right pitch and prepare for this presentation well. I invite you to book a session with me here now to see how my program can support you.
4. Overcoming objections: During the presentation, the customer may raise objections or concerns about your service. At this stage usually, many of us would have left the room after hearing the first objection. The negative emotions of shame, guilt, fear that showed up at the last stages, quickly triple up here. This results in you getting into defensive mode. Now, instead of helping the prospect understand how their objections are not helping them solve their problems, you now find yourself defending your opinions, or just scared and leave the room.?They still have the problem when they raise their objections, it’s your job to keep pressing through those objections to understand the real reasons behind. Now this is state of the art, and practicing with your coach is essential. We have an entire section on overcoming objections in my program. Put "objections" in the comment below to get more details.
5. Closing: Once the customer is ready to make a purchase, you close the sale by finalizing the details of the transaction and completing the necessary paperwork. You guessed it, the main emotion usually coming here is happiness, joy. But before even anything is signed in the universe that shows that you are in business, you already celebrate. I invite you to contain your joy please. This is the critical moment where you really need to keep pushing to get the first transaction, especially when you are new in business (a contract isn't enough). Showing your joy at this stage might actually turn off your prospect and get them out of the deal. If they feel like you are happy to just have made a sale, it might signal that you’re in this just for the money.?

These components may vary depending on the type of service you sell and the sales channels you use (virtual, social media, in person, etc.). But they provide a general framework for understanding the sales process and the emotions that WILL arise.

This might scares you off, but it shouldn’t. If you’re passionate and driven about your project, then, you should learn how to better manage your emotions as they appear. Mostly though, you should learn how to get prepared, because, the more prepared you are at each stage, the less amount of emotions will just appear out of nowhere. I'll go more into this in another article (so make sure you subscribe to my newsletter, to not miss anything.)

Book a session with me here , if you’d like to know more about my current program for African professionals with killer projects, and how I can be of support.