Emotionally Empowered People Avoid These Phrases

Emotional Empowerment is the ability to identify, understand, and manage one's beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and responses. Since this quality assists you to balance communication with rational thought, it can greatly increase your ability to make good decisions and to build deep, quality relationships.

People frequently ask me: What does Emotional Empowerment look like in personal and professional life?

With many years assisting people to connect with their beliefs, thoughts, and feelings to clear out limiting beliefs I compiled a list of words and phrases that Emotionally Empowered people avoid.

See how many of these you can stay away from in your everyday conversations:

"I told you so."

This one is difficult to resist: You warned a person against a certain course of action. They ignored you, and now they're suffering the consequences.

What good will it do to remind them of that now? Reminding them is a form of judgment and criticism.

The next time you encounter someone who created their own misery, let them know you empathize that things didn't work out--and that you're willing to assist them. This will impact them greatly, and they'll be more willing to listen in the future.

"Who cares?"

You might have a lot on your plate. The last thing you need is to deal with someone else's whining about some insignificant problem.

Except, the issue is significant to them. If you show that what is important to them is important to you, you show them they are important to you. And by showing empathy when they need it most, you'll gain a friend or dedicated worker.

Remember, it's only a matter of time before you might need the same.

"Not my fault."

Isn't it ironic that when things go wrong, the default reaction of many isn't to address the issue? 

Rather, it's plausible and accepted deniability.

When everyone plays the blame game, nobody wins. So, when someone makes a mistake, don't concentrate on who's at fault. Instead, focus on what went wrong--and how to fix it now and for the future.

"Not my job."

Yes, you're busy. No, you might not be able to help everyone, all of the time.

Think of your management, colleague, or teacher. Likely, part of what compelled you to respect and appreciate them was their willingness to provide assistance when you needed it. Their readiness to get down in the trenches, right beside you.

Emotionally Empowered people assist others whenever and however they can.

"Because I said so."

A title or position may make someone 'the boss', but it doesn't make them a leader. 

Instead of hurling orders or asserting authority, the Emotionally Empowered person strives to inspire and influence others. You do that by leading with actions and personal example.

People will follow, not because they have to, but because they want to.

"I've got to bail."

Nowadays, people break commitments to anything and everything--from plans for the weekend to handshake deals.

There are plenty of reasons why people bail. But Emotionally Empowered people do their best to only make commitments they can follow through on. And because their word is their bond, they follow through--even when doing so isn't convenient. 

"Yes."

It's not that Emotionally Empowered people never say yes--it's more effective to be careful about saying, 'Yes'. They realize that there are only 24 hours in a day. Seven days in a week. Fifty-two weeks in a year.

They make tough choices because they know it's all about focus.

Every time you say 'yes' to something you don't really want, you're saying 'no' to the things you do want.

"Do it like this."

"I love to be micromanaged," said no one, ever. 

That's why Emotionally Empowered leaders give people the freedom they crave: the freedom to explore ideas and to find their way.

And rather than take over every job at the first sign of difficulty, they take advantage of opportunities as teaching moments, coaching and guiding others to success. By doing so, they help others to become the best versions of themselves. 

"Bad idea."

When Google embarked on a research project to discover what made effective teams successful. They found that the most important factor was "psychological safety."

Google management discovered:

"In a team with high psychological safety, teammates feel safe to take risks around their team members. They feel confident that no one on the team will embarrass or punish anyone else for admitting a mistake, asking a question, or offering a new idea."

In other words, great teams thrive on trust. Emotionally Empowered people work hard to build an inclusive environment where people feel safe.

Psychological Safety inspires great teamwork and great accomplishments.

Passive-aggressive comments.

Emotionally Empowered people avoid subtle digs at others or use passive-aggressive comments to express displeasure.

Instead, they speak their mind and keep it real--making sure to do so respectfully.  

And when they give in to a decision they don't completely agree with, they don't secretly undermine or sabotage that decision. Instead, they disagree and commit. In other words, they put their personal feelings aside, give enthusiastic support, and go all-in by doing their best to make the decision a success.

Emotionally Empowered people aren't perfect; they make mistakes like everyone else. But by avoiding phrases like these, they make more reasonable, balanced decisions.

And in doing so, they make their emotions work for them, instead of against them. Furthermore, they avoid triggering other people's negative emotions. These two benefits are worth more than can be adequately measured. Yet, when a survey is conducted there are many of these elements and similar ones that are cited as reasons for disliking their job or leaving. 

For additional phrases to avoid go here.

About Dr. Dorothy: 

A consultant, coach, and keynote speaker, Dr. Dorothy brings 30 plus years of global experience to leadership development, behavioral change, and human potential.

There are reasons why Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, Ph.D. is a successful influencer in the public and private sectors — many who encounter her are drawn to her dynamic personality, hard-working values, tenacity, and accomplishments. https://drdorothyspeaks.com