Emotional needs not being met.

Love feels so much better when I give it than when I receive it.

Before you sharpen your pitchforks, I know how melodious it feels to be adored and cajoled by someone else.

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Find the courage to have an affair with someone who's already married.

Affairs often emerge from a shared sense of loneliness and a gradual deepening of a bond, rather than a bold or premeditated decision to cross a boundary.

So with that being said, I don’t feel it takes courage to have an affair.

It begins innocently, as a friendship.

He was lonely, and so was I—I was living in the spare bedroom of my house at the time while we got our house sold for our separation.

A married woman and I started chatting casually about gardening which was a carry-on from a previous conversation at our sporting club, things we both enjoyed.

Those conversations just continued and before long we were keeping each other company for most of the day with our messages.

Both of us were in a vulnerable place in our lives, we were there for each other for support and as confidants, and eventually, our emotions got the best of us.

It wasn’t something either of us sought or planned, but it just kept growing as we connected on a deeper level. Within about 6 months it became physical, and suddenly, we were in a full-blown affair.

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Thank you?….It wasn’t about bravery; it was about vulnerability. We opened up to each other in ways we hadn’t with anyone else. It wasn’t calculated, and it wasn’t about taking risks—it was about filling an emotional void and finding solace in each other.

We didn’t mean to but we fell in love. If courage was involved, it was the courage required to be open and vulnerable with another human being going through a similar experience in life, not courage in the way this question appears to be worded.

I am very surprised about why no man has written about the emotional needs of a man which often the wives fail to fulfill, or the lack of general compatibility and understanding between them.

Cheating has several reasons behind it, sex, though one of the major reasons, isn't the only reason.

A man wants respect, support, appreciation, and trust from his wife. When he was fed up with being accused and insulted without any fault, he decided to cheat on her for real.

Sex with their wives is a form of emotional intimacy too for men:

Okay, let's keep the biological aspect of sex aside. Many women don't realize that by making love with their wives, men feel an emotional bonding too.

That bonding is much more than just a sexual bond, much more special and bring him closer to his female counterpart.

Lack of appreciation and support from wives: A lot of men complain that their wives never appreciate whatever they do for them, always takes out faults, nags, tries to change their core identity.

Such behavior sends a strong signal to a person that he/she feels unwanted by their partner.

?Do you want to add a word or two?

A man (and a woman) in a marriage wants to be appreciated every once in a while and supported throughout by their spouse to feel wanted and at home. When not given at home, people tend to look for it elsewhere.

Communication problems: Women are great at communication. We can talk and listen about a problem and solution for hours.

More than the actual problem or solution, we like talking and listening about them. On the other hand, men don't want to talk about their problems a lot and wants to work on solutions by themselves.

Such differences bring a communication gap between a couple which affects their marriage more than people realize.

Not enough laughter: Still not sure why laughter is so underrated in a relationship and marriage. If two people who are supposedly in love cannot make each other laugh, that's plainly sad. A humorous wife/husband is so attractive. No one wants to return home every day to a spouse who has a gold medal in sulking.

?Your comments ……

There can be similarly a hundred more reasons that can make an Indian man cheat on his wife.

Sex, I again say, can be the top reason, but not the only reason for cheating in every case.

Same way, Indian women also cheat on their husbands, and again, sex can be the most common reason, but not the only reason at all.

For a marriage to be largely happy and monogamous, both the man and woman must realize what their spouse is like, and what they themselves are, and should work on a plan harmoniously where both their needs can be met as much as it's possible.

Oh and yes, cheating also happens when the husband and wife stop working like partners for life.

Apart from sexual needs, men have emotional needs too, just like women. Let's focus on them as much.

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