Emotional Intelligence

• Introduction

1. Nowadays, Companies hire and promote based on emotional intelligence?rather than particular skills or IQ.
2. So, if you want to create success in your career,?emotional intelligence is one of the top skills?that you need to develop.
3. This is a summary of LinkedIn Course {Developing your emotional intelligence} for Gemma Leigh Roberts which provides the four key factors of emotional intelligence.

• Understanding Emotional Intelligence

1. General intelligence consists of 3 elements: IQ, Personality, and emotional intelligence, which interact together to help us solve problems and make decisions.
2. Unlike Personality and IQ which are fairly fixed, your emotional intelligence can be enhanced and grown.
3. IQ measures a person's reasoning ability?and how they use information and logic to answer questions, But EQ (Emotional Quotient, another term for Emotional Intelligence) measures: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness,?and relationship development.
4. Much of how we perceive?and interact with the world around us?can be derived from our emotions.?And if we're not consciously managing this process,?our emotions are taking the lead causing psychological and physiological responses.?At times, this may work in our favor, but it may not.?And it may be beneficial to control this process.
5. ?This then leads to a behavioral reaction,?which is how we then interact with others?based on how we processed the situation.

• First Key Factor: Being Self Aware

1. We often associate behavior as being a response?to an event or something happening to us.?But actually:?An event takes place, you experience thoughts, feelings?and emotions related to this event,?and then you behave in a specific way?to reflect your thoughts and emotions.
2. Recognizing your emotions is the first step?in building your emotional intelligence, and to do this, it's useful to consider past challenging scenarios?that you've experienced and analyze the parts you played?in the scenario and the outcomes.
3. Recognizing your emotions is also about knowing your flow, It's the practice of taking part?in an activity that requires focus and you feel so absorbed in it. The good thing about working in a state of flow?is often it won't feel like work at all,?and you'll be taking part in activities?that are interesting for you.?
4. Finding your flow and working with flow?will help you build your emotional intelligence?and reframe how you think about and react to challenges,?getting the most out of the situation.?So, think about your personal or working life.?What activities creates a sense of flow for you??And could you add more of this to your working life?

• Second Key Factor: Manage Yourself

1. Reacting quickly in the heat of the moment is the norm?for most of us at one time or another.?BUT it's all about learning your A, B, C, D, E.?It's a tool that helps you to take control?and deal with potentially difficult situations confidently?and effectively whilst building really strong relationships. It's about replacing beliefs and feelings about the event?with something that will be more useful?and will help you achieve a better result.

?You can break the chain?between thinking and feeling and reacting by:

1. Take a step back when you feel?like you might be reacting emotionally?and you could be more objective.?
2. Give yourself some breathing space. Take 60 seconds to remove yourself?from the situation and take deep breaths.
3. Give yourself time to recover, don't make any decisions?and don't keep mulling over the scenario in your head.
4. Challenge your thoughts.?Is there a way you can think about the situation?that can create a better outcome for you?
5. Choose how you will respond.?You may decide that your original thoughts?for the best course of action.?Or you may decide on another approach,?either way you have now?assessed the best option for you?and you can react accordingly.
6. It can be hard to shift your perspective?when you feel passionately about something.?But this gives you an advantage?because it broadens your horizons?and it will help you to understand?how best to deal with the scenario?so, you have to make it a habit?and build the process into how you view events?before you make decisions about how to behave.
7. Seek different points of view, try to see these contrasting ideas as a bonus.
8. Ask more questions.?Listen to what others have to say.?As well as broadening your perspective,?you will also build a relationship with the other person,?which is an additional positive outcome.
9. Spend time with new people.?It's really easy to get in the routine?of speaking to the same people or the same kind of people.?But building relationships?with those outside of your normal peer group?will give you a completely different insight?into other perspectives.
10. Read more in general and more broadly.?To enhance your perspective,?you have to be always learning and expanding your horizons.

• Third Key Factor: Social Awareness

1. ?It's about being aware of what's going on around you?and understanding other people's feelings.
2. ?The first place to start is with your senses,?and in particular, using your senses?to learn more about the world and people around you.?What do you see, feel, hear??At this stage, you're gathering information,?learning to pay attention?to the details of your surroundings,?whether that be noticing?facial expressions and body language,?or hearing specific tones in people's voices.?Then?you could start to piece that information together?to get an idea of what people are thinking?and the dynamics between people.
3. ?It can take a bit of practice?to step outside of ourselves and our own thoughts?and immerse ourselves in our surroundings.?How do you use your senses in social situations??Are you good at picking up on social cues?and what's going on around you??Take some time to assess your social awareness and think about how you can increase this.
4. Empathy is the ability?to sense other people's emotions, you can empathize through asking the other person questions?to find out more about what they're experiencing?and how they feel about the situation, if you don't have the opportunity to ask questions,?you can also take a step back and imagine the possibilities?of how someone may think and feel.
5. You don't want to necessarily assume?you know exactly what a situation is like for someone else,?as that can actually be counterproductive.?This might alienate the other person?if your assumptions are incorrect.
6. ?Another tip when displaying your empathy?is not to agree with everything the other person says,?constantly finding examples?when you've faced the exact same challenges or situations.?It can actually be irritating for the other person?if we always have an example?that brings the conversation back to us.?The key here is balance.?Ask questions to find out more.?Offer support and understanding?without assuming you have the answers?or knowledge the other person requires.
7. ?Communication is a two-way street,?which involves providing information for others?and gathering information from others. How we communicate with our voice and our bodies?says a lot more about the actual message?we want to get across?rather than the exact words we use.
8. The key to effective communication is listening.?Yes, you will have a point of view,?a message that you want to get across,?but if you want to build effective and strong relationships,?you also need to really listen to messages?from the other person.?And that includes words, tone, and body language.
9. If you're unsure of how well you communicate,?the best ways to gain an insight?is to gather feedback from others.?Ask for opinions from colleagues or friends?on how well you listen?and how effectively you get your message across.

• Fourth Key Factor: Managing Relationships

1. ?You have your own unique strengths?when it comes to managing relationships.?You have your own style?and way of communicating that's individual to you.?Learning to capitalize on this?will help you to play to your strengths?in order to foster collaborative?and effective relationships.
2. ?The only way to truly understand?how others perceive you is to get their insights
3. Being emotionally flexible however,?means being able to listen to feedback?and appreciate the points of view?without being overly self-critical or defensive.
4. Gathering another perspective is always useful?even if you don't totally agree.?The feedback you receive?isn't a fact, it's an opinion,?and the more opinions you can gather,?the more of a rounded perspective you'll get?of how you come across.
5. ?The next step in a continuous development process?is to refine some of your approach.?Over time as you make small adjustments?these small steps will compound to create big results.
6. You can always repeat?the continuous development process?and get better at building relationships?and communicating effectively.??
7. It's essential you don't focus?on the exact message, but more on the intention. If people understand your intentions,?even if the execution isn't quite right,?they're much more likely to listen and engage with you.
8. Focusing on intent provides you with a number of advantages.?It can boost your confidence.?As you'll understand, it doesn't matter exactly?how you deliver a message, people will connect?with the intent behind it.?It will give you the ability to be flexible?in your approach, relieving some of the pressure?associated with crafting that perfect message delivery.?You'll also come across as natural and authentic,?which is a huge bonus when connecting with people.