Embracing Vulnerability!
??Carl Shawn Watkins ??
Aspiring Attorney - Attorney Brand Advisor. ?? I help attorneys & legal professionals build their brands with vulnerability and authenticity. Author-In-Progress. "Ask Mr. Vulnerability ?
A new study suggests that we judge ourselves more harshly than others do when we put ourselves out there.
We all know the experience of vulnerability, even if we don’t call it by that name. It’s that feeling you get when you’re about to tell someone “I love you,” try out a new skill or ask for forgiveness. When the risk of getting rejected, laughed at or criticized is real. In my many years of working and leading people, I have explored some of the reasons why we shy away from vulnerability. While we often celebrate it as a strength in other people, she discovered, we tend to see it as a weakness in ourselves.
“We love seeing raw truth and openness in other people, but we are afraid to let them see it in us,” she writes. “Vulnerability is courage in you and inadequacy in me.”
Why is vulnerability more admirable when someone else is doing it? Vulnerability makes us human and relatable. Whether it is fear of rejection, fear of failure, or fear of speaking up in a meeting, admitting a mistake, apologizing for a wrong, or admitting a lack of knowledge - there is always going to be a risk. However, without risk, there is no reward. The outcomes we envision rarely play out the way we imagine. Steve Jobs shared this powerful perspective, “Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life.
Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.”?His perspective resonates with me because after the death of a close friend I adopted the mantra, “short of death, what is the worst thing that could happen if…” I often ask my clients this question when they are tap dancing to the music of their own fears.
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“Give yourself permission to be more of yourself, rather than less.”?
Allow the world to experience you. If you have fears, walk with them and move forward anyway. Many of us hold unrealistic standards for ourselves (and others). If you use those standards as your measure, you will never be prepared enough, ready enough, good enough. Go for it anyway. When you succeed, you will be glad that you did. If you fail, be kind to yourself, learn from the experience, and keep it moving. There is a reward in all of it.
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https://carlshawnwatkinsconsulting.as.me/coachingsession
Health Scientist//Public health officer
3 年Judging is just bad, not to talk of harshly. Well said ??
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3 年God bless you. Patient with Cancer.
Customer Success Manager | Leads with Empathy | Proactive Advocate | Be Your Own Unicorn ??
3 年??Carl Shawn Watkins ?? Absolutely, as a former Special Education Teacher I often would tell kiddos, you are the biggest road block to your own success. I should also take that advice myself! ??
Enthusiasm Ignitor??Self-Doubt Eraser?? Confidence,Cognitive Behavior & Life Purpose, Coach & Consultant?? International Keynote Speaker ?? Writer?? With Emphasis in Women's Empowerment, Leadership & Spa??
3 年??Carl Shawn Watkins ?? this is a fantastic article! We definitely are harder on ourselves than other people. I have been there. Second guessing what I was doing or what I said. Once you let all of that go, you feel a sense of freedom. A weight has been lifted off your shoulders.
English Teacher??Upschool Global Ambassador ??Taekwondo Instructor.
3 年Love this! Definitely, we need to be more compassionate with ourselves. At times, our own judgments about what we do are unfair and cruel. Thanks for sharing this captivating topic! ??Carl Shawn Watkins ?? Beautifully written! ??????