Embracing Trust: The Core of Our Values

Relationships matter. Trust matters.

"It's not the blood you spill that gets you what you want, it's the blood you share. Your family. Your friendships. Your community. These are the most valuable things a man can have." - Andy Garcia in Steal Big Steal Little, or if you're a metalhead like me, the opening to "Before Dishonor" by Hatebreed.

Trust is a sacred vow. Trust is oxygen for relationships. It can be given freely yet is often hard to earn. Trust is a blanket of security, providing comfort and assurance. It also equates to powerful influence, capable of leading to progress and prosperity when maintained, but causing conflict and pain when broken.

Trust + Honesty + Communication = The foundation upon which progress can be built, families thrive, teams take giant leaps, and communities prosper. How do we build trust with others? What behaviors do we exhibit that enhance trust, and what behaviors destroy it? Living one's values is of utmost importance. Our core beliefs and hierarchy of importance steer most of our decisions. Is it your faith, your family, your friendships? Or is it money, power, status, or fame?

What we emanate from our being in our interactions and behaviors defines the legacy we will leave behind. Is it goodwill, stewardship, work ethic, or the gift of our most valuable asset, time?

A personal story: years ago, at one of the first firms I worked at, I had an idea that I believed would be beneficial from a business development and marketing perspective. I knew this because I had successfully implemented it in another geography and was seeking to replicate it elsewhere. After sharing this information with mid-level leadership, it was shut down. To my surprise and dismay, the idea was resurrected weeks later and presented in a call as management’s own idea. The amount of disrespect and breach of trust I felt was immeasurable. That was the beginning of the end for me at that firm.

Maybe you, the reader, have a similar story where trust was broken. How did it make you feel? How did it impact your professional life?

Think about the relationships where trust was built. How did that feel? How did you thrive? What benefits did you gain from those relationships? On a personal level, have you ever cheated on someone or been cheated on? These are real-life situations with real emotions.

In a skeptical society, we crave sincerity from others. Yet, society has taught us to focus on "What's in it for me?" This mentality creates barriers to establishing authentic relationships. For those of us in sales, this is especially true. Despite unfair typecasting, those who sell value above all else and put relationships before the dollar tend to thrive.

Trust is a fragile yet concrete part of our humanity. Much like the human body, trust is fragile in the sense that certain behaviors and actions can shatter it. However, in the storms that prevail through relationships, both personal and professional, trust keeps the house standing tall. It's what we do to preserve that trust and build it over days, weeks, and years that matters most.

It's a healthy exercise to evaluate whether we are living our values. Are my profession or personal relationships jeopardizing the values I hold dear? Think about the relationships that helped develop your character. Which ones were built on trust, and where was trust shattered, offering valuable life lessons in return? Whose trust have you betrayed, and what did you learn from it?

I once said that those with sincere, forthright, and value-based intentions will become the most successful in life. Tying back to your values, what does success mean to you?

Recently, I attended the viewing of a spouse of a dear friend. The line of people stretching out the door and down the block to pay respects defined legacy. It showed that someone, no longer with us, made an impact on each person there. It’s a legacy worth living. We must ask ourselves, what impact will we leave that ripples through not just this generation but multiple generations? - JL

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