Embracing stress is more important than reducing stress

This book is a must-read for those who want to understand their emotions better and harness them in order to succeed. Kelly McGonigal talks about research indicating that it is not stress but the combination of stress and the belief that stress is harmful. In a study in the US, researchers discovered that people who believed stress was harmful were more likely to die than those who did not. However, this only applied to people who experienced high levels of stress; those who didn’t believe stress was harmful had low risk of death. Another study at Yale University showed that people who have a positive outlook on old age live 8 years longer than those who do not. That is more than the extra four years you earn by exercising and not smoking!

Your attitude toward stress plays a major role in your life choices. If you view stress as harmful, you tend to avoid it at all costs. However, if you view stress as helpful, you are more likely to come up with strategies to cope with the source of stress and seek help from others when needed.

In fact, many of the negative outcomes we associate with stress may actually be the consequence of trying to avoid it. To be good at stress is not to avoid stress, but to play an active role in how stress transforms you.

The author recommends a three step process for practicing a new mindset whenever you feel stressed:

1) Acknowledge stress. Simply allow yourself to notice the stress, including how it affects your body.

2) Welcome the stress by recognizing that it is a response to something you care about. Can you connect to the positive motivation behind the stress? What is at stake here, and why does it matter to you?

3) To make use of the energy that the stress gives you, instead of wasting that energy trying to manager your stress. What can you do right now that reflects your goals and values??

The mindset shift that matters is the one that allows you to hold a more balanced view of stress – to feat it less, to trust yourself to handle it, and to use it as a resource for engaging with life.

The book is very well structured and easy to read. So, I will not give more spoiler about the book, but strongly encourage you to read this book and apply its lessons yourself.