Embracing Solitude: Finding Balance in an Extroverted World

Dear Colleagues and Empaths,

In today's fast-paced, extroverted world, are you allowing yourself enough time alone?

Growing Up with an Extroverted Parent

Reflecting on my childhood, I grew up with a highly extroverted mother. She loved socialising, had numerous friends, and thrived in her work environment surrounded by colleagues. Coming from a large, extroverted family, she naturally assumed her daughter would follow in her footsteps.

Understanding Extroversion and Introversion

However, I was different. Let’s take a moment to clarify the differences between extroverts and introverts. Extroverts recharge by being around others, while introverts need solitude to regain energy.

As a child, I cherished solitary walks with our family dog. We spent hours in the fields behind our house and on the lake, where I would row to small islands, enjoying adventures in my own company.

A Memorable Experience

One winter in a Christmas cabin in the snowy woods of France, I got lost with my dog Rakker for hours. I'm not proud of this, but I went for a walk and got lost. We crossed fields and empty woodlands, searching for our way back with my best friend by my side, who, by the way, was completely useless in finding our way back home. Despite the initial fear, this experience highlighted my need for solitary reflection.

I remember discovering a big empty field full of daisies one day. Millions of them. It took my breath away, and I just sat there for an hour.

Feeling Misunderstood

Growing up as an introverted daughter to an extroverted mother presented challenges. I often felt misunderstood. My mother couldn't grasp why I wasn’t more outgoing. She compared my solitary activities to her own social youth, making me feel insecure and isolated.

Coping with Bullying

Bullying at school further pushed me into my shell. I started pretending to be more extroverted, forcing myself to attend social events. Despite these efforts, I often felt out of place and awkward, reinforcing my sense of alienation.

Embracing My True Self

In my early 30s, I discovered the concept of being an empath and read about how empaths function in the workplace. This revelation was life-changing, helping me to finally understand and embrace my true nature. I learned that withdrawing from the world was my way of coping with overwhelming sensory input.

Tips for Finding Balance

If you ever feel pressured to conform to extroverted norms, here are some tips to help you find balance:

1. Self-Reflection and Growth: Spending time alone lets you reflect on your goals and values, leading to better self-understanding and informed decisions.
2. Mental Health: Solitude helps reduce stress, improve focus, and boost creativity. Regular alone time can prevent burnout, helping you recharge.
3. Balance: Balancing social time with alone time is crucial. Extroverts also need downtime to rest, while introverts benefit from social interactions to maintain a well-rounded life.
4. Intentional Solitude: Make your alone time enjoyable. Engage in activities you love, such as reading, meditating, walking, or pursuing hobbies. This enriches your solitude and prevents loneliness.
5. Boundaries: Set boundaries in our extroverted world. It's okay to decline social invitations if you need time for yourself. Communicate your need for solitude to ensure others respect your space.
6. Technology Detox: Disconnecting from technology is vital. Regular breaks from screens and social media allow you to fully experience the benefits of alone time.

Conclusion

In conclusion, no matter where you fall on the introversion-extroversion spectrum, it's crucial to prioritise sufficient alone time for a balanced and healthy life. Find what works best for you and make it a priority amidst the demands of our socially-oriented world. Embrace solitude as a powerful tool for personal and professional growth.