Embracing Recognition: The Power of Accepting Compliments as a Woman of Influence

Introduction:

Being recognized as a "Woman of Influence" can feel both empowering and humbling. I have spent decades working as a professional speaker, executive coach, and transformational expert, helping others unlock their full potential. Recently, I was honored to be seen as a Woman of Influence within a communication and leadership organization—a recognition that made me reflect on how women respond to compliments and, sometimes, backhanded praise. This article is a call to embrace recognition, even when it feels uncomfortable or surprising.

The Importance of Recognition:

Over the years, I have had the privilege of empowering over 30,000 business leaders, guiding them to tap into their inner strength and amplify their influence. Through this journey, I have witnessed firsthand how powerful recognition can be—not just from others, but from oneself. External recognition can validate our efforts, boost our confidence, and affirm that we are seen and valued. However, self-recognition is equally important. It's the internal acknowledgment of our own capabilities and the understanding that we have earned the right to take up space in our spheres of influence.

Being recognized as a Woman of Influence isn’t just about the title or the praise; it’s about owning the impact I’ve had on others. It’s also about understanding that influence comes with responsibility. For many women, there’s an ingrained hesitation to embrace their achievements, often due to societal expectations to remain modest or “humble.” But when we shy away from recognition, we are not only downplaying our own contributions but also depriving others of the inspiration we offer.

From my experience, recognition opens doors—not only to opportunities but also to conversations about what it means to lead and influence as a woman. It allows us to challenge stereotypes and shift perspectives. It’s not about seeking validation from others but understanding that acknowledging our own influence empowers us to step more fully into our potential.

I’ve seen how recognition, when embraced, can create a ripple effect. When women confidently own their accomplishments, they encourage others to do the same. When they stand up and 'blow their own trumpet' it's about recognizing and owning their influence. This shift in perspective—from avoiding the spotlight to owning our influence—helps break down the barriers that hold so many women back from stepping into leadership roles or speaking up in important conversations.

Ultimately, embracing recognition is about acknowledging that our voices matter and that our influence is not something to shy away from, but something to claim with pride. The more we accept recognition, the more we inspire others to recognize their own power.

Navigating Compliments:

Compliments can come in many forms, and not all of them are straightforward. Sometimes, praise is delivered with an underlying critique or a backhanded comment. As someone who has served on the Toastmasters International Board of Directors and co-authored books like World Class Speaking in Action and Women On Success, I’ve received my share of well-meaning, but complex compliments. For example, someone might say, "You're so successful for a woman in your field!" or even imply that my influence, though recognized, is somehow "too strong."

These kinds of remarks can be frustrating, but they don’t take away from the genuine recognition behind them. Learning to accept compliments with grace and not diminish the praise has been a lesson in self-worth. Yet, a new challenge arises when we’re rejected or criticized for being perceived as too influential. How do we deal with the discomfort others may feel about our power or success?

The key lies in understanding that their discomfort is not a reflection of our value. It’s about standing firm in our achievements and continuing to embrace our influence unapologetically.

Empowering Others Through Acceptance:

By accepting recognition and praise, I not only empower myself but also set an example for others. When women see me confidently owning my influence, they are encouraged to do the same. Every time we graciously accept a compliment—whether pure or mixed—we send a message that it’s okay to be proud of our accomplishments, creating a ripple effect of empowerment.

Here are three strategies to navigate compliments and inspire others:

1. Reframe the Compliment: Focus on the positive part of the praise, even if it’s mixed, and respond confidently. For instance, turn “You're successful for a woman” into “You're a successful woman” and respond with a simple, “Thank you.”

2. Model Healthy Acceptance: Accept compliments without deflecting or diminishing your achievements. Turn your response from "It wasn't perfect" into "Thank you, I worked hard on that achievement". This sets a strong example for others to embrace their own success with confidence.

3. Use it as a Teaching Moment: If appropriate, gently reframe the narrative, such as saying, “Thank you! I believe many women in this field are just as capable,” to shift the conversation toward inclusivity and recognition of all.

By following these strategies, we empower others to celebrate their successes and influence without fear or hesitation.

Encouraging Women to Claim Their Influence:

Over the years, I’ve seen so many women struggle to fully own their influence. One of the biggest challenges is simply accepting the power they already have. My advice? Start by practicing how you receive compliments, even the ones that might sting a little. When someone acknowledges your work, just say "thank you"—no explanations, no downplaying. By doing this, you’re not only affirming your own worth but also showing others that it’s okay to take pride in their accomplishments.

Your influence matters. And when you claim it, you give others the courage to do the same.

Conclusion:

Being recognized as a Woman of Influence has made me reflect on how we, as women, often struggle to accept recognition—especially when it comes wrapped in a backhanded compliment or when our influence is perceived as "too strong." But every woman has influence in her own sphere, whether it’s in a boardroom, a community, or a family. By embracing compliments, even the complex ones, we allow ourselves to step fully into our power without letting others’ discomfort diminish our worth.

I encourage every woman reading this to own her influence, even when it feels intimidating to others. Let every form of recognition, no matter how it’s delivered, serve as a reminder of your potential to inspire, lead, and transform.

I am Teresa Dukes - A Woman of Influence