Embracing Emotions and Human Relationships

Most of the time, my brother Thines Sreedaran recommends movies to me—he knows my tastes inside and out. When I say "brother," I mean cousin. In a Tamil family, cousins feel as close as siblings, and we address each one with the appropriate family title rather than their name. Though I’m an only child with cousins, I’ve never truly felt alone. This strong sense of collectivism runs deep in our relationships, with everyone considered a brother, sister, or in-law—it’s intrinsic to our Tamil culture.

Recently, Thines Sreedaran suggested I watch Meiyazhagan, a beautifully woven film capturing a journey of memories, family bonds, and rediscovery. As I watched, my tear glands were hard at work, and I realized I’d been longing for a movie that could evoke such deep emotions. It was a perfect, heartwarming Sunday watch—thank you!

With Deepavali approaching, I find myself reflecting on family, tradition, and the things I miss most. Although it’s not my first time away for the festival, it’s tough to miss the rituals, laughter, and gatherings that define this season. I woke up with a strange question in my head: "What time of year am I going to feel sad?" That's this time around—homesick! Last week, a friend suggested I avoid social media to sidestep the inevitable homesickness, but in a way, I welcome it—embracing emotions is what makes us human, after all. Like in Inside Out, where sadness eventually finds its place alongside joy, I believe all emotions deserve acknowledgment. For some reason, I love this feeling of embracing all emotions—sadness, anger, happiness, even longing—because they make us human. While AI may have emotions one day, for now, let’s stay present. As Inside Out movie, even sadness has its place, highlighting that all emotions deserve to be acknowledged, and that's how Riley found her way back home. That brings me to a book to recommend!

As a student pursuing my Master's in Energy and Earth Resources, balancing two demanding classes—AI Technology and Innovation, which includes reading assignments and podcasts to listen to, and TVL Practicum—a startup consulting project, and a thesis on workflow implementation, life is full. But I still carve out time for books that speak to my heart. (Don’t ask me how I find the time—simply, I make it!) A recent read I’d recommend is Wisdom from the Ramayana on Life and Relationships by Chaitanya Charan, which offered invaluable insights into spirituality, relationships, and personal growth. Here are some insights from the book that resonated with me:

1. Speak with, not about, others: Conflict often needs direct communication between those involved, without involving mediators. If you have a problem with me, let’s talk it out—simple and effective.
2. Practical spirituality: Hinduism is often seen as fatalistic, but it’s deeply pragmatic, teaching us to control our duties while leaving outcomes to destiny. The author shares a powerful analogy: "For farmers, plowing is duty; the rain is destiny." We control what we can and let go of what we can’t. Hinduism is a dharmic religion, and I believe in dharma over karma—that’s just me.
3. Emotion and intelligence: Balancing emotional intelligence with rationality helps us rise in love, rather than fall. Higher emotions are cultivated through devotion and rational intelligence. To me, love should help us rise, not fall.
4. Selfless love: Love, in its purest form, is God, fulfillment, hidden, and the ultimate truth. This message from Chaitanya's book and the movie Meiyazhagan captures the essence of what love can be—a divine, fulfilling, and timeless truth.
5. See each other through: Another quote from the book: “We are not here to see through each other, but to see each other through.” It’s about care and love—one human race, with love as our ultimate religion. My favorite song, Imagine by John Lennon, embodies this perfectly.
6. Living daily: Inspired by a sticker I saw on a recent trip on my friend's car, “Relax, someday we’re going to die,” I’m reminded we live daily and die once. It’s easier said than done, but it’s a reminder to live fully each day. As Chaitanya also mentions, we are all going to die someday, so be present.
7. Kindness is key: Ellen DeGeneres says, “Be kind.” Our deepest need is to love and be loved, and kindness is at the core. A little kindness goes a long way.
8. Avoiding judgment: We tend to judge quickly, often based on limited information. Sometimes, we don’t know everything—it’s okay to admit that and give others a second chance. Forgiveness shows we have a big heart.
9. Acknowledge, Apologize, Amend: These are the three steps to reconciliation. Taking action, however small, matters. Don’t wait—if you miss home, say it; if you’re sorry, say it. Actions speak louder than words.
10. Spiritual fulfillment: Beyond the body, our deepest needs are spiritual, and emotions play an essential role. Being Hindu, I hold this close to my heart. Spirituality is fundamental; while our bodies are perishable, love and connection are not.

In light of these reflections, I wish everyone a Happy Deepavali! Even miles away from family, we can be the light we seek in others. This year, Deepavali coincides with Halloween, making it an extra festive season in the U.S.—perhaps an ideal time to dress up and embrace these dual traditions. Missing home is part of the journey, but I look forward to soon returning to Malaysia for another cousin's brother’s wedding, reliving Meiyazhagan moments.

Until then, I’ll carry the lessons from these past weeks, embracing every emotion, appreciating each connection, and sharing in the spirit of the festival. Let’s all cherish our bonds, be kind, and celebrate our cultures, wherever we may be.