Embracing discomfort: Hallmark of Transformational Leadership

There was a young boy who chanced upon a butterfly cocoon and brought it home. He observed with anticipation as the butterfly inside struggled to break free from its confining shell. Inch by inch, the creature pushed against the shell, determined to emerge into the world. Yet, despite its efforts, the struggle persisted. Seeing its struggle, the young boy was overcome with compassion and intervened by cutting a small slit into the cocoon. But instead of a majestic butterfly taking flight, what lay beneath was a small, weak creature with crumpled wings. Despite the right intentions, his actions inadvertently impeded the natural process of growth. What he failed to see was that the butterfly needed to wrestle against the cocoon to build the strength necessary to spread its wings and take flight. It was through this struggle that the butterfly would complete its transformation and emerge stronger.?

This poignant tale serves as a powerful reminder of a universal truth: growth often requires struggle. Just as the butterfly must fight to break free from its cocoon, we must face challenges, and embrace discomfort in order to truly grow and thrive as individuals.?

As leaders we often come across various challenges and difficult situations which test our resilience, capability to overcome them and staying afloat amidst uncertainties of life. It is at this crucial juncture where discomfort operates as a catalyst for inner transformation. Within the crucible of discomfort leaders are forged, and true growth mindset flourishes. However, it is imperative for leaders to not only embrace discomfort themselves but also to empower their teams to do the same. By encouraging team members to step out of their comfort zones, take risks, and ownership of their work, leaders pave the way for inner transformation which acts as the driving force for outer transformation.??

It is indeed true that no transformation can happen without struggle and pain. Particularly within the non-profit sector, where complex socio-economic challenges abound, transformational leaders play a central role in enabling their people to overcome these challenges. They recognize that discomfort is not something to shy away from but rather a vital ingredient for social transformation.?

Transformational leaders are able to see the importance of directly facing discomfort as a necessity for tackling systemic issues. By embracing discomfort personally and fostering a culture of acceptance within their teams, transformational leaders cultivate an environment of transparency, accountability and growth. When you create a space like this, then collective action becomes a reality, because what we often see in the external environment is a direct culmination of internal transformation.

Transitioning from the for profit sector to non profit sector, was one of the most daunting experiences of my life. I found myself in an unexplored territory, facing problems I’ve never come across before. This feeling of not having control however channeled my inner chaos, which was important to gain clarity. It was a sign that we're on the brink of something transformative. Some of the indicators that I have learnt during my 12+ years journey which denote a position of discomfort are as follows:

1. Walking into Unfamiliar Territory: When you find yourself required to navigate through challenges or tasks that are entirely new to you
2. Feeling Vulnerable: Experiencing a sense of vulnerability or uncertainty about the outcome of your decisions or actions
3. Emotional Turmoil: Feeling a mixture of anxiety and apprehension about the future that lies ahead?
4. Pushing Personal Boundaries: Being pushed beyond your comfort zone, facing situations that test your capabilities, biases and beliefs.
5. Facing Resistance and Encountering Failures: Encountering resistance or opposition from others or within yourself as you strive to enact change. You might find yourself testing out new approaches only to encounter disappointment when they fail to yield results, leaving you feeling stuck. Despite your best shot, the situation remains unchanged, impacting your overall well being.?

We have discussed the indicators which signal towards a discomfort that we may be experiencing at a certain point in life. You're caught in a whirlwind of emotions—feeling confused, unhappy and lost. The nagging question echoes in your mind- “Why me? What did I do to be in this position?”?

So really, how do you then approach such a situation??

It's common to slip into a state of complacency, seeking external explanations for our struggles. While it's true that multiple factors may contribute to our discomfort, we often overlook looking inwards. Taking a moment to pause, breathe, and reflect inwardly is essential. One has to sit with the discomfort, let themselves feel the pain, soak it in and let it pass. The only way through discomfort is by letting it in and embracing it, there is no shortcut to struggle. It is inevitable, necessary and the only way forward.???

Another aspect related to this is knowing when to disengage. We do not possess the remote control to external factors, but we can control what is intrinsic to us. When you focus inwards you get clarity on how you can disengage from a situation that has remained unchanged despite persistent trying. There is pain and learning in letting go of situations. Through discomfort, we learn how to alleviate pain for ourselves and others. This knowledge is especially vital for leaders, enabling them to anticipate and address challenges. In this journey, it's crucial to prevent emotions from clouding judgment. Instead of seeing ourselves as passive recipients of adversity, we must embrace our resilience, emerging stronger from every trial, like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

Navigating the complex landscape of leading a non-profit organization presents various challenges. The sector, dedicated to tackling significant social issues cuts across gender, class, caste, religion, ethnicity, and operates against the tide of revenue generation. Securing sustainable funding to address these multifaceted challenges remains a perpetual struggle. In the absence of attractive compensation packages, the sector relies solely on individuals driven by a deep-seated commitment to social change, making talent retention a task due to non-competitive salaries.

Moreover, fostering long-lasting relationships with donors and external stakeholders becomes rather difficult when organizational vision misaligns. Balancing scalability without compromising quality is yet another feat. In the face of such complexities, founders must continually adapt, research, and innovate to develop strategies that prioritize the welfare of both the organization and its beneficiaries. As founders, it becomes imperative that you have a solid foundation of research and strategy to navigate these challenges. We share here a framework that helps us to navigate these challenging situations.

At Lotus Petal Foundation, we recognize that discomfort manifests in various forms, each presenting an opportunity for growth and learning. Given our focus on serving children from marginalized backgrounds, it is essential that our changemakers exhibit sensitivity, empathy, and a profound understanding of the multifaceted challenges these children face. When our changemakers encounter challenging situations we encourage them to look inward, introspect, and make sense of what needs a shift/change within themselves to navigate the external challenges. Keeping the “child at the center”, we ask ourselves what should be done differently to help our children in the best way possible. When done with honesty, this method usually paves the way for transformative change in the individual and resolves the external challenge in the best way possible.?

In certain cases, we've observed a decline in the attendance of our beneficiaries because they are forced to do household chores, contribute to family income through odd jobs, and girl students face discrimination due to their gender. These scenarios are challenging, compelling us to intervene by counseling parents and sensitizing them about the importance of their children's education, all while navigating resistance and push back from their end. Our persistence yields positive results, empowering parents to support their children's academic journeys. Patience is key as we navigate these challenges, understanding that lasting impact may take years to materialize. Yet, we remain committed to our vision of a future where our beneficiaries thrive with improved access to education and sustainable livelihoods.

As our organization expands, we confront another significant challenge: securing funding. This demands extensive dedication to serving our current donors, while also actively seeking out new partners who share our vision. Yet, it also necessitates tough decisions about when to walk away from partnerships that no longer align with our mission's broader objectives. Negotiating these delicate balances is crucial, especially when differences arise between our donors’ proposals and our scope of work. While some projects fuel our growth and advancement, others fail to find common ground, leading to inevitable partings.?

Organizational growth necessitates recognizing the importance of delegation as a founder. While giving up control may feel uncomfortable, it's crucial for smooth operations and empowering your team to evolve. It fosters a sense of ownership, value, and trust among employees, encouraging them to push boundaries and contribute to the organization's success. Embracing vulnerability as a leader is pivotal in navigating this transition, as it opens avenues for personal and professional growth.

In these 13 years of my journey as a non profit founder, I have navigated various challenges that have tested my beliefs and values but also showed me the path leading to growth. A very vulnerable moment in my journey, had to be with asking for help. As someone who has never relied on any individual for any kind of support be it monetary or moral, and has always been comfortable steering the wheel doing operations work, it was difficult to take the reins and be at the forefront of fundraising. But with time, I had to settle into it because that was required from me as a founder and I had to support and show up for my people. Accepting my vulnerability, and sitting with it helped gain clarity that it is okay to ask for help. It only strengthens your position as a leader and opens one to learning and continuously improving as an individual.

Some key takeaways from my experience of embracing discomfort as a non profit leader are as below:?

1. Discomforting situations are full of chaos. And as much as it is chaotic, this chaos is the pathway to clarity. Every discomforting situation builds your muscle and helps you grow.?
2. To foster growth, one must embrace challenges and difficult circumstances. This mindset acknowledges that change occurs from within.
3. As a leader, it's essential to guide your team through challenging situations, this promotes? transparency and trust. It also empowers team members to actively engage in problem-solving, enhancing their sense of belonging.
4. Dealing with disappointments is tough, but it also calls for self reflection. Only through self reflection can you get to the root issue of your problems, and find the strength to move forward.?
5. During challenging times, you will have to provide requisite support to your team and people so that they take it in stride and work with you towards a solution.?

As professionals working in the development sector, what are some of the discomforting situations you have encountered and how did you overcome those challenges??