Embrace the Suck and Hard Conversations with Family

Embrace the Suck and Hard Conversations with Family

Read time 4 minutes - September 26, 2024 | Read on my website

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Welcome to 1-2-3 Inner Game, your weekly hit of actionable strategies to achieve a high-performing, healthy, and thriving life.

Today's Highlights

  • Confronting family
  • 1-2-3 Inner-Game
  • Embrace the suck
  • Doing meaningful work
  • Negative feedback
  • Some of the things I've read and listened to this week


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Hello Hello!

You know that feeling when there’s something you need to say to a family member, but you just keep dodging it?

You play out all the worst-case scenarios in your head—what if it blows up?

What if they take it the wrong way?

So, instead of dealing with it, you push it off… for weeks, months, sometimes years.

Well, I had one of those.

But here’s the thing: the weight of NOT having that conversation?

It just builds.

Every time you avoid it, it doesn’t go away—it gets heavier.

So, I finally faced up to it.

Sat down, looked them in the eye, and said all the things that needed to be said.

Was it easy? No. Was it messy? A little.

But, damn, the relief afterward—it’s like exhaling a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.

And here’s the kicker: it wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d built it up to be.

In fact, it felt pretty damn good.

Liberating, even.

Like ripping off a Band-Aid and wondering why the hell you didn’t do it sooner. It turns out, the story in my head was WAY worse than reality.

Now I’m sitting here thinking, “Why didn’t I just do that ages ago?”

That’s the lesson: the hardest part is in your head. The actual conversation?

That’s just the clean-up crew.

The real mess is the avoidance.

So if you’ve got one of those lingering talks, trust me—just lean in.

The sooner, the better.

Because the other side? It’s a lot lighter.


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Here's some Inner Game wisdom to chew on this week

1 question from me

Are you playing a game worth winning?

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2 insights from me

  • Fancy presentations and polished appearances don’t equate to real value. It’s the raw, hard-earned insights and actionable ideas that truly move the needle—focus on delivering results over making things look good. (Click to Tweet )

  • Here’s a rule to live by: if you want to kill a big dream, tell it to someone with a small mind. Keep your vision close and share it with people who think big. (Click to Tweet )

3 quotes

“The right time was yesterday. The best time is now.” - Unknown

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“Too many people want to be something to everyone and end up being nothing to anyone. Universal appeal means universal indifference” - Seth Godin

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"Have almost too much self-belief" - Dhiren Harchandani

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Embrace the Suck

Here’s the thing no one told me about growth—there's what I thought was happening, and what was actually happening.

Take a look at this chart—it was my wake-up call.

I hit my 20s thinking it’s all about grinding, stacking wins, and hitting that elusive ‘made it’ moment. But what this chart is screaming is:

That’s just the pre-game you young Jedi

It’s like building a house of cards—looks stable until the first gust of wind hits.

Then, boom—my 30s roll in, and life hits me like a freight train. I enter what I’d call the ‘Dark Night of the Soul.’

All the hustle, the shortcuts, the success stories I was chasing? They hit a wall. I realized none of it has real staying power unless it’s built on something deeper.

And this is where the dips come in—the gut-wrenching, ‘What the hell am I even doing?’ moments.

But those dips?

They’re not the enemy.

They’re my greatest teachers.

The chart reflects that shift. It’s messy, unpredictable, but that’s where I discover the real tools—mindfulness, Ironman training, journaling, whatever my reset button is. I stopped chasing surface-level wins—TEDx talks, bestseller labels, the ‘next big deal’—and started operating from a place of purpose.

And the twist? The real success isn’t in the spike you see in my 40s.

It’s in what I learned from the chaos, the meltdowns, the hard resets.

That’s where the foundation gets built, brick by brick.

By the time I hit my 40s, success looks different. It’s no longer about the external trophies—it’s about balance.

In my work, my health, my relationships, my purpose. I’m not just climbing ladders; I’m learning how to build them. And every fall off that ladder? It wasn’t a failure—it was an upgrade in disguise.

So if I’m in the thick of it right now, stuck in the middle of the mess, I remind myself—that’s where the real magic is happening.

Lean into the dips.

The suck is where the growth is.


WHAT'S NEW WITH THE POD

How To Do Your Best And Most Meaningful Work

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Negative Feedback

The quicker the feedback, the greater the impact—and the lower the chances of lingering resentment.


Some of the things I read and listened to this week


I'm rooting for you to continue crushing it! ????

Dhiren

P.S. If you loved this edition, let me know (hit reply). I’m fueled by java ?? and compliments.


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