Elon Said The Quiet Part Out Loud

We live in this weird universe where a video goes “viral” and all these people who have no connection to the content of the video feel the need to weigh in on it. I am also guilty of this, of course. About a month ago, what happened was some — OK, wait, I need to define some terms here first.

A “DINK” is “Double Income, No Kids.” It is a part of the culture wars now, because the right sees it as selfish, i.e. you are not advancing humanity. The discussion of “no kids = selfish” ignores a few big buckets, including infertility, PCOS, repeated miscarriages, and the general state of the service economy, where you can work an entire week of shifts at TopGolf and make $348. (I know, I tried it.) Sometimes the “no kids” part of “DINKs” is based on biology or financial logic.

So we get this DINK couple, and they make a video about being DINKs, right? You can find the video within this conservative losing his mind:

OK, so I am a “DINK.” I was a “DINK” with another woman too, from about 2010 to 2017. My “DINK-dom” is not by choice, but rather by infertility. It’s depressing, but it’s life.

Elon, who has 10 kids by various women and helped a subordinate of his do IVF and cracks jokes about “re-populating the planet,” felt the need to chime in on this one. It should be noted that at least two of Elon’s children do not speak to him. Just putting that out there.

Here is an article about Elon’s response.

Here is the crux of the Elon argument, apparently:

“There is an awful morality to those who deliberately have no kids: they are effectively demanding that other people’s kids take care of them in their old age,” he wrote. “That’s messed up.”

Awful morality. Nice.

The problem with this logic and argument is that it makes inherently no sense. So the primary reason for having kids is because you want someone to take care of you when you’re older? Oh sheesh. I think the “boy genius” said the quiet part out loud. That’s not supposed to be the reason you list publicly. It’s supposed to be purpose, love, greatest love I’ve ever known, what would I do without my kids, my kids are my world, etc. You’re not supposed to say out loud, “I am scared of dying alone and shitting myself and no one will be there to help,” even if that’s the actual reason.

I live in a neighborhood with a bunch of older people with adult children. Their adult children barely if ever come visit them. (Some families are better at this.) So I’m not sure this even holds as a day-to-day argument, really.

“Awful morality” is a tough term here, but I assume he realizes the limits of biology for some, so I’ll ignore that. (Personal growth.) He’s also using “awful morality” as a shot at “the libs” like AOC, who talk about not wanting to bring children into a drowning world, etc. I get that as well.

This article, which is from The New Yorker , caused a ton of grief and grievance with guys like Elon too.

A lot of what’s actually happening in this discussion is that far-right guys tend to want a 1954 suburban America, where they breed women, they go do deals and live how they want, the women handle the kids, and all the lines seem to be up and to the right, financially and reproduction-wise.

That’s not as much the reality these days for various reasons, including obesity, infertility, later age of first marriage, general “stagnation” around home ownership, micro-plastics, and more.

But to claim to want kids simply as something to take care of you in 35–45 years is the wrong argument, methinks.

What's your take?