The elephant in the room. Do coaches have their own shit together?

The idea from this blog came after a conversation with my brother. We do not discuss work, never really have which was fine when we both worked in the food industry. It was just easier as we knew the same people, we knew the same retailers, it all just felt too close to home. And when I left the food industry, we never really changed that habit. We still do not discuss work except this time of year when I hope he has a spare packet of pigs in blankets for his little sister! Anyway, he asked me how my course was going and we got chatting about coaching and the types of techniques I work with and he laughed and said a typical brother comment, then he paused and said “I guess it doesn’t matter what you’ve got going on, if you can help someone else then that’s the point isn’t it?” And yes, it is! That is the exact point, I can help others and I also have the techniques to help me.

If you are deciding whether to work with a coach, there is so much to consider. But the best advice I can give, is go with the person who you gel with. Take them up on their offer of a free 30 minute consultation and have a chat with them. Ask them about their background with their career, how they got into coaching, ask them if they work with a coach as a good coach should be and they should be proud of the fact that they do. Because how they can be passionate about what they do if they do not live and breathe their passion?

But remember one thing, COACHES ARE ONLY HUMAN THEMSELVES. The skills & techniques that they are helping you with, they have probably had coaching themselves on it and seen the great results of it, and they want to share that. I can only speak on behalf of me and the amazing coaches I have worked with, and alongside. There are days when my anxiety is not in check, when I am not “Happy Jo” and I can revert back to my nemesis, “Spiky Jo”. Where my confidence is not reflective of who I am and what I have achieved. Where I revert to the “child” in a conversation and then go into “parent” mode when the conversation should be adult to adult. Where I worry about something I have no influence over. I am only human. And thank god I am as who would want to work with a coach who is robotic in their manner? But what coaching has and continues to give me is the ability to spot the changes from “Happy Jo” and turn them around pretty instantly. It has given me the confidence to stop myself in my steps, breathe, think and review. 2020 has pushed us all to the limit in more ways than we could ever imagine. And we need to embrace these emotions and behaviours. There is only so long that we can put our head in the sand for before we feel that impact, either physically, mentally or emotionally.

So, when you are choosing which coach to work with, choose one that you resonate with. Choose someone who is like minded, who does not claim to be flawless because if they do, the chances are they are not being totally honest with themselves or with you. Coaching is a journey, constantly learning about yourself, always keeping your core values at the forefront of who you are and what you do. We all have deep rooted behaviours and beliefs in us. Some are amazing and we should embrace them. Some may need tweaking or refining. And some need binning and replacing with fabulous new ones. But nobody is the finished the article, we all just want to be the best version of ourselves. Change takes time and it takes tenacity. In however long we are on this earth, I do not ever want to be the finished article. I want to keep learning and keep evolving. And I would love the same for you.

https://www.winhurstcoaching.co.uk/worktogether