Election + RTO + Work Stress + Holidays = Trigger Season
Joe Sunderman
Ex-JNJ | MBA | High-Impact Data Analyst | Strategic Insights | Open Source Intelligence | Project Management | Research Operations | Content Marketer & Activator | NextUp Cincinnati Member | Culture Thought Leader
"IS NOTHING SACRED!" was a resounding response from a colleague years ago when they received a season greetings card (accompanying image example) from their manager that had a "Go Blue!" on the envelope. She was infuriated.
I was dismayed by the reaction, as I had a front-row seat to a neurodivergent and overblown reaction to an innocuous sticker on a Christmas card. This "jab" from her manager (a former Wolverine player) was sent via a Christmas card after a long drought of University of Michigan who had finally defeated Ohio State in football. The rant of my colleague (who was a big Buckeye fan) that ensued went on for a lengthy period and lasted a couple of days.
This is not a neurotypical response. BE AWARE of such individuals at work or at family gatherings the next several weeks.
I learned a new term, which I wish I learned in 2016 - neurodivergent response.
Neurodivergent individuals can often find it more challenging to regulate their emotions and keep their ‘lid on’. Identifying, understanding and managing emotions can be more challenging, as well as experiencing higher levels of daily overwhelm and subsequent fatigue. This can lead to reactions which seem sudden and extreme compared to the original event or cause. It can also be more challenging for neurodivergent individuals to re-regulate themselves and calm down.
How this relates to Last Week's Elections
Unfortunately, our country is divided. The reactions of the political election results have been extreme. From the collective behavior riots of January 6th to the viral meltdown videos from last week's elections, there is a small fraction of Americans that have become overly passionate and fixated on an outcome that is out of everyone's uncontrol - election voting.? Like a football outcome, a missed field goal (CFP semifinal) in the waning seconds of game (or an election outcome) can result in some fans / co-workers letting those emotions spillover into the workplace.
Be Nice, Practice Kindness and Compassion
Given that many businesses are requiring a return to the office, there is stress around layoffs and holidays, and a contentious election, the environment is such that we all can be triggered by the smallest matters.
Unfortunately, a post this morning from Tiya LaCroix should remind us all that bad behavior needs to be called out and addressed in the workplace. This is not a small matter but a rather large one.
For World Kindness Day, please be respectful of each other. Not only today, but all days.
As such, be very cautious with your co-workers, friends, family and neighbors. I have seen co-workers who were friends completely fall apart over the smallest of matters from politics to promotions and misunderstandings. What Tiya LaCroix posted is simply unacceptable.
Be nice, practice kindness and be compassionate, as you have no idea what people are going through. If you find yourself nervous around colleagues or family members that exhibit excessive passionate responses, try to defuse or avoid them. Walk away. It is not you - it is all about them. Give them space, as they have a lot to work on for themselves to recover and to recalibrate after an outcome that does not go their way.
Last Note on Neurodivergent Response Example
Around the holidays, I always sent e-mails at JNJ to co-workers around Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter. I had been sending out these for years with my colleagues responding accordingly with a positive note.
This e-mail below around Easter got a neurodivergent response from the same aforementioned colleague (who received such e-mails for years with friendly responses). But in this case, she was so offended, she reported me to HR. This is not a neurotypical response that I had received all the years I have sent light-hearted holiday e-mails.
I am very creative, but this I cannot make this stuff up.
This is why I share my experience for others to learn.
Broken People are Among Us
Be careful who you associate and what comments you make. Be as sensitive as possible. The colleague who is very sarcastic and is overly critical about everything is a probably a sign of someone that they have underlying issues and crave attention. Likely, something in their development from child to teenager to adult caused stunted personal maturation.
If you feel like someone is "off", full of drama and catastrophizes, avoid them. Otherwise, it will cost your job trying to help a broken person with a very lengthy history of toxicity in the workplace. Lesson learned - zebras can't change their stripes.
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3 个月I am 100% behind World Kindness Day & need to share that both neurotypical & neurodiverse people can be cruel at work. While likely not your intent, the description of nuerodiverse people in this post is inaccurate from what we know based on research & amplifies stigma against an already marginalized group of workers. People living with disabilities, including people under the wide umbrella of "nerodiversity" are more likely to be abused than to abuse others. In toxic societies & workplaces, neurotypical people often have trouble regulating emotions, keeping their 'lid on' & their injurious behavior is excused as "business as usual" (see Dr. Gabor Mate's book "The Myth of Normal: Illness, Health and Healing in a Toxic Culture" and Jen Fraser, PhD's book "The Bullied Brain: Heal Your Scars and Restore Your Health"). We need to name cruel behavior as cruel behavior & avoid stigmatizing entire groups of people. I am sorry that you felt attacked at work. Your holiday greetings sent to spread joy may land differently for people who do not celebrate those holidays. I like to send non-religious seasonal greetings to express my friendliness in ways that avoid alienating people of different religions & cultures.
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3 个月It also goes beyond the workplace. There are those in personal relationships with broken people who will attempt to drain all the kindness and goodwill out of their partners.
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3 个月In honour of World Kindness Day Joe Sunderman I wrote about Kindness and its powerful impact on our health for my series with Psychology Today. Let's hope it leads to more kindness everywhere. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-bullied-brain/202411/bullying-hurts-your-health-kindness-boosts-it
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3 个月Where I come from (Toledo, OH), folks see anything U of M football related as triggering.