Eighteen Cues to Offer a Quick Sense of Belonging from "The Art of Insubordination" by Todd Kashdan

1. Treat people better than they expect.

2. Be an exceptional listener by interrupting with curious comments, such as: And what else? Why do you think that happened? What would you have done differently?

3. After asking a question, actually listen to the answer.

4. Bring enthusiastic energy to a conversation.

5. Instead of asking how you can help, just do it.

6. Err toward smiling or laughing when someone tries to be funny.

7. Make a big deal of putting a phone away before locking into a conversation.

8. Ignore incoming texts and phone calls when with someone.

9. When talking, keep your head from swiveling when other people pass by.

10. Invent a moment to be silly with them (even if it's just a sound effect).

11. Highlight things you like about the person you are with.

12. Detail things the other person did that you liked.

13. If you thought of someone when doing something enjoyable or meaningful, tell that same person afterward.

14. Share knowledge that you think they would be interested in.

15. Tell jokes at no one's expense.

16. Be open-minded when they share something that is weird or unusual about themselves.

17. Reveal compelling insights such as what you crave, envy, regret, mourn, or dream.

18. Express whatever positive sentiments they brought out now and later.