Ego Death

A Rambling Stream of Consciousness on Human Development

By, Toso

“If you don’t like someone’s story, write your own”

Chinua Achebe

Ever heard of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs?

Or maybe stumbled on Spiral Dynamics?

Maybe not.

Fortunately, my goal here isn’t to educate you about the intricacies of human developmental theorems. (Though, if you’re interested — here are a link to get you started.)

Really what I want to do is skip all that information and get right to the transformation.

You know…

Part where the lightbulb goes on –

When you can look back on your entire life as a comprehensive story, leading to your current state of being, instead of as a series of potholes that have derailed your plans and all but stripped your tires of willpower and personal discipline.

Because my guess, is that you’re tired. Of damn near everything.

The news cycle,

the orange man,

the impeachment proceedings,

the "almost" wars,

the forest fires,

the quarantining,

the civil unrest,

the global warming epidemic,

political games,

relational distrust,

governmental incompetence,

broken communities,

commercial exploitation.

ALL of it… and then some.

I feel you.

Because frankly, I’m tired too. And the worst part is — I think we’re headed in the wrong direction. Fast.

Skip the information. Get to the transformation.

“Good and evil both increase at compound interest. That is why the little decisions you and I make every day are of such infinite importance”

C.S. Lewis

Thus, I think we’re past due for a new framework for living.

About 2000 years past due, if we’re keeping it a buck.

Some may call it a revolution.

Cool.

But, it’s not your run of the mill, ‘let’s kill the tyrants and seize all factors of production’ type of revolution.

Sorry.

I’m talking more about a, ‘let’s fuel our collective growth as a species and move in a direction towards humanity’ type of revolution.

Yeah. That kind.

Because, what we have now is overextending us to the point of dis-ease and collective fear.

Hear me out.

This isn’t a call for socialism — which is just a euphemism for big government.

Nor is this a call for some type of new capitalism — which, again, is a nice way of saying “let’s do the same thing, but different.”

This is a call for something MUCH better.

A type of existence where each and every individual upgrades their thinking, and is allowed to become the master of their own destiny.

This is a call for growth.

First individually.

Then collectively.

The thing is, there are a lot of folks out here who don’t believe it’s possible.

Or, maybe they do — but they can’t really conceive of how it’s possible.

Or, maybe they can — but simply enjoy playing god with a bunch of socially underdeveloped fetuses posing as fully matured human beings.

So instead…

They plan, strategize, and organize.

Movements, governments, and flatulence.

Okay not the last one, but it rhymed so.

Point is, that in the absence of some uniting ethos to help us keep from plunging into anarchy — we tend to choose wickedness over kindness, and fear over love.

Therefore, our ‘benevolent’ masters likely feel the need to insist on keeping us from this evil, by creating a safe playground in which we can frolic about.

Call it whatever you want.

Because without that euphemistic sandbox; our incentives to murder, steal, rape, pillage and break stuff are just too high.

Enter doctors Abraham Maslow and Clare Graves.

Two men who managed to expose academia to a reality most every world religion has long accepted. (Human development doesn’t stop after 12th grade.)

But –

Why is it, that the state only requires us keep measure of our intellectual growth through high school? And, how come at NO point do we ever make it a priority to measure what is really important…

Our socio-emotional (or, spiritual) selves.

The fact is, that our inner worlds go largely untouched as we make our way through an industrially aged education system that only exacerbates the problem at hand.

But I get it.

I mean.

It’s really hard to measure a soul, or an emotion, or anything that cant be extracted with a scantron. Probably impossible if we’re being honest.

Even more so when you consider that our current systems tells us GDP is the only metric worth keeping tabs on.

A measure that claims dad driving his truck back and forth from some building and crunching numbers every day is of more value to society than mom taking care of the three future citizens at home.

Fact is. The powers at be don’t measure what’s important.

To be sure, they don’t even try…

Yet, they still have the audacity to wonder why we’re in the midst of a mental health crisis, only compounded by this corona mess.

(And guess what they tell us to do?)

MORE DRUGS**

I think it’s time we call out these philanthropic overlords for their utter lack of competence.

Because people are not widgets.

Which is why I’ve decided to make you my mission.

My job as a leader isn’t to perform. Or even to inform.

Because charismatic speeches and well-written essays only get one so far if goals aren’t aligned.

My role is more akin to that of an equipment manager.

I am here, simply to help you do what you do best.

That’s it.

I’m an equipper.

I (try to) equip souls with the tools they need to fight the good fight, and elevate themselves to a place where we can finally begin and reform society to the highest possible degree of human excellence.

Because most leaders, want one thing.

Power.

Or…

‘Influence’ (for the less malevolent.)

Me? I’ve gotta be honest, I’m super lazy.

Fact: I can barely lead myself out of bed on a daily basis.

So really, I don’t need all the extra stress. Besides - I would much rather live in a world where nobody needs to be influenced.

By me, or by anyone else.

Because at the end of the day… only you truly know what’s best for you.

Thus, my solution is a simple one.

Help YOU to discover who YOU are, and then push YOU to learn and live life on YOUR terms. Anything less, and you’ve effectively ceded YOUR sovereignty to someone less invested in your success... than YOU.

Back to the psych doctors. Maslow and Graves.

These guys effectively created a framework of consciousness that I believe could help people both visualize and map out their inner worlds in a way Jesus’ parables may not quite satisfy on an intellectual level.

Consciousness — something we still don’t really understand.

Only, that it differentiates us from the rest of organic life in some way.

(I have a few ideas… but, that’s for another essay)

What I want to get across here, is that consciousness is NOT the same as knowledge.

Knowledge is what you know.

Consciousness is how you know.

What I’m talking about, is the intangible — yet very real — portion of being that animates one's life and gives each moment new meaning.

Because, honestly…

AI’s and machine learning tools will soon dominate the world of information

(see Moore’s Law)

So, the fact that you memorized when the Magna Carta was signed is going to be rendered absolutely useless within a few years.

Everything that can be learned from a book will be obsolete once computers are powerful enough to gobble up and spit out data at a rate that frankly, doesn’t even make sense.

And that date is quickly approaching.

So, knowledge as far as I know, will belong to the domain of super computers before long;

And really… it’d be silly for humans to try and compete. What we have over machines, is not speed. Or even knowledge in the way I’ve defined it.

What we have, is the potential for understanding.

Real understanding, which comes from compounded experiences and allows us to move beyond black and white fact finding to true wisdom.

In short — human beings can think creatively.

We can break the rules.

Meaning that inputs and outputs aren’t always clearly related. Or related at all. Yet, somehow… we’re still able to deduce meaning.

Even from things that seem random.

Where computers will soon be adept at recognizing old patterns, our human brains are geared more toward gleaning overarching principles that help to create new ones where they didn’t exist before.

The thing is –

We can’t do these things, if we continue existing in a paradigm of replication and reductionist thought, amounting to nothing more than a simplistic “monkey see, monkey do” type approach.

We need to level up to a new type of thinking, free thinking.

(A type distinct from any ‘authority’)

And, what happens when you begin to think for yourself?

You begin to become yourself.

“Freedom is being you without anyone’s permission”

Simon Sinek, a thinker and inspirational speaker, once said in a pretty legendary Ted Talk that people don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.

i.e. “The Golden Circle”

Again, “people dont buy what you do, they buy why you do it”

It’s the why that is important.

Though many of us have forgotten why we do anything these days.

Its as if we all simply defer to the common denominator… ‘money’.

But there is so much more to life.

So far, we’ve all been okay with just playing along.

Playing the ‘wait and see’ game.

Following the flow of whatever clique society has placed us in.

Never bothering to do the hard work of digging down to the core of self and discovering what it all really means.

Or, why we’re even here in the first place.

So — I’ll just tell you what I’ve learned so far, and let you be the judge.

Only thing is; you’ll have to keep reading…

Were only getting started.

The 10 Truths I’ve found so far

One… Everything is Connected.

Collectively Conscious

Everything you have ever thought, in fact everything that anyone has ever thought — is permanently etched into our communal human brain.

Don’t believe me?

Fine. Believe Tom.

Tom Chi is a guy way smarter than you or I could probably ever hope to be.

He’s worked on research at Harvard University since the age of 16, and has also helped develop ventures like Google Glass, all before his 21st birthday.

At his core, he's a researcher and a scientist, and so his theories aren’t rooted in any spiritual ‘mumbo jumbo’.

Here’s what he came to understand about our universe at a basic level;

Everything we perceive in this existence — is really and truly connected.

Not in an abstract manner, but in a directly observable way.

One such example of this is this concept of ‘laniakea’

A Hawaiian term meaning ‘wide horizons’ that was borrowed to name a supercluster that houses our very own Milky Way galaxy.

What is unique about this supercluster is that it extends over 250 million light years, and comprises of over 100,000 galaxies.

All of which, are connected by a singular point of gravity…

Essentially, all of these galaxies are ‘falling’ towards one another in a cosmic dance of epic proportions.

And folks have no idea why.

Another wild observation made by Tom, was one rooted in neuroscience.

Every time we think in novel ways, we form neural pathways that hadn’t existed before. Our brain is a wonderfully complex system that we still don’t fully understand, but what we can gather, is that when we begin building new skills — such as playing the piano — previously dormant areas of our brains begin to light up in new ways.

One example, the piano was invented around 1700.

So imagine, in the year 1600 — there was no such thing as a ‘thinking in piano’. Our human brains simply didn’t have those connections yet.

But, When humans got around to inventing and then playing this beautiful instrument, what started to happen was awe inspiring.

We began to quite literally re-form the collective brain. Our neuroevolutionary tree branched out to areas previously unknown, and we began to think in new ways.

Psychologists talk about this phenomenon on a more individual basis — and it’s called neuroplasticity, or brain elasticity.

But as a collective consciousness, this has never been fully understood.

Though, from what I can gather —

We did not have access to the neural connections or of a ‘piano player’ 400+ years ago, because there was nothing of the sort for these neurons to form around.

But then, as we continued to evolve and grow as a species, this new skill effectively transposed itself onto our brains in a way that molded how future generations could evolve.

We can actually gift our posterity with the latest in neural fashion — simply by thinking in new ways. Wild shit.

You're a star.

Another thing that isn’t all that new, yet still amazes me every time I think of it, is how we’re all “star stuff” — as Carl Sagan so eloquently stated.

And this has far greater implications to our state of existence than one may assume. For not only does this point to the fact that we all contain within our being the exact same building blocks as our celestial ancestors, but that in reality — we ARE those celestial beings.

Remember; laniakea.

We all know the rule, if not — grab your old science text book and flip to the chapter on Conservation of Mass.

There, it should illustrate a law of the universe that we’ve been able to grasp for some time now. In fact, ancient Greek philosopher Parmenides argued long ago the concept of ‘ex nihilo nihil fit’, or that “nothing comes from nothing”.

Further proven by Russian scientist Mikhail Lomonosov in 1756, was the basic idea that matter can neither be created nor destroyed.

Meaning that since the very beginning of time, every single atom that was — still is.

Only, things have been moved around a bit.

All this is to say… you are in fact a star.

Realize that deeply seeded within your atomic makeup is a distinctive ability to shine bright. This is not just a cute Rihanna quote, it’s a profound truth.

And it is what we we’re all put here to do.

Energy and vibrations are the nature of reality

“Enlightenment is when a wave realized it is the ocean”

Thich Nhat Hanh

Even these ‘good vibes’ we often so casually reference are rooted in an objective reality that is universally connected.

Light waves, sound waves, water molecules, even ‘solid’ materials; all are oscillating back and forth with a relative strength and vigor that manifests as what we see, hear, and touch.

Beyond the basic 5 senses which we’ve all been drilled on since preschool — there are emerging others ‘senses’ that aren’t quite as popular, but that we really should start talking about at scale.

Here are just a few;

Synesthesia (the blending of senses)

Thermoception (ability to sense changes in temperature)

Proprioception (coordination as it relates to spatial reasoning)

Equilibrioception (coordination as it relates to balance)

Chronoception (ability to accurately gauge the passage of time)

(If you’d like to learn more about how the “big 5” of sight, smell, taste, touch, and hearing is old news — check out this video)

What I’m trying to get at here, is that our experiences are a lot more nuanced and complex than what we’ve previously thought.

Moreover, reality is far deeper than what our surface level senses can tell us.

One example, those ‘gut reactions’ we all experience from time to time, are actually a culmination of tens of thousands of years of evolution trying to manifest into a feeling which we can interpret as some nudge in a particular direction.

*There’s a documentary on Netflix about this phenomenon, called InnSaei, and it speaks to this incredible reality far better than I can do here. Here's a link to the trailer.

Reality is a beast, and to assume you have a grasp on it because your vision is 20/20, means you are ripe for being fooled by an illusory existence.

Recognize that everything you see is moving at a rate that’s not even perceptible to us, and in that, begin to gain a new sense of awe for everything.

Look closer, and be less sure of what your eyes tell you.

Listen deeply, and begin to appreciate the varying dimensions of this existence.

Approach nature with the admiration it deserves — and maybe, you can begin to unlock some of the secrets to reality for yourself.

Mathematical Constants

Fibonacci numbers I first came into contact with when trying to better understand the stock market, as this sequence is often used as a predictor of price action.

Basically, they are a sequence of integers such that each number is the sum of the two preceding ones (0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55, 89, 144…)

What I had yet to realize, was that these numbers are apparent in a ton other domains as well.

Strongly related to the golden ratio, this sequence of numbers was named after the Italian mathematician in 1202 but were thought to have been discovered as early as 200 BC by an Indian thinker named Pingala who used them to help pattern his poetry.

There’s a certain magic to these numbers, as they seem to continuously pop up in seemingly unrelated domains, like as poker and art. Algorithms and shapes. Technical analysis and data structures.

Not to mention, in nature as well.

Another seemingly incomprehensible feat we’re all now well aware of, is the principle of relativity.

Achieved by Einstein in 1905, the basic crux of this idea found in the equation we know as E=mc2

A connection between mass, energy and light that we have still yet to uncover all the implications of — as it upended the 200 year reign of Newton’s theory on mechanics and introduced the possibility of space-time as one unified entity.

An overly simplistic conclusion that can be taken from it, is the idea that all matter is, in a sense, relative.

What we see, isn’t necessarily all there is.

So numbers are cool. You knew this.

And I’m not even going to talk about Pi.

That conversation would (literally) take forever..

But what does it all mean?

To me, it seems clear that our existence is a lot more interconnected that we give it credit for. In fact, some may call it intentionally designed.

There’s an apparent thread of reality that runs through everything we see and experience

And to ignore the evidence for this, is to pretend that we inhabit a randomly derived system that has no meaning or purpose. Personally, I think that’s dead wrong.

Two… Growth is Never Automatic.

(told you we were just getting started)

Evolution: Darwin to Graves

“One general law, leading to the advancement of all organic beings is namely; multiply, vary, let the strongest live and the weakest die”

Charles Darwin

Not much has changed in our understanding of natural selection since the groundbreaking ideas of Charles Darwin hit the shores of Western culture over 160 years ago.

A lot of what we now know is still largely attributable to his intimate understanding of how the mechanisms of life forms work. As inspired by his five week visit to the Galapagos Islands in 1835.

What he understood then, and what we now grasp on a practical level, is that each step of the natural selection process includes two radical ideas — to transcend and to adapt.

This means, in order to surpass old modes of living that no longer serve the organism, it must ‘learn’ to adapt new tools & devices deemed necessary to deal with the continually changing environment.

All this, in a massive effort to maximize one’s chances for survival.

This is eerily similar to language used by Clare Graves and Don Beck (another contributor to the Spiral Dynamic framework) when talking about the development of the human psyche.

In the way they put it, human beings have a need to “transcend and include”.

Referring to our instincts for growth to newness, but also recognizing the inherent value gleaned from each previous stage of existence as we traverse the ladder of evolution.

One of Grave's ideas that I found remarkable, was in the description of a certain ‘chasm’ that needed to be crossed in order for humans to embark upon a new plane of understanding.

It was as if he was well aware of the teachings of the Buddha, in which the goal is to reach nirvana, or of Jesus Christ’s plea for His children to be born again.

According to spiral dynamic theory, there are eight levels to our development. Between the 6th and 7th lie the gulf of understanding.

If we are able to move past the ‘green’ values of people driven social networking, we can grow to possess a new type of ‘yellow’ value system based in process-oriented flow presenting newfound energies previously untapped.

Once we leap over this gap, our potential to better understand the maps of our own consciousness increases exponentially. We can begin to exhume new paradigms of thinking which allow us to work together in a way we have yet to achieve with any level of wide spread consistency.

Unfortunately, this doesn’t ‘just happen’ with time, both Darwin and Graves (as well as Beck, Maslow and others) have all noted that there needs to be a causal external force which enables us to move from one mode of being to another.

I believe that external cause is now presenting itself to humanity in the form of our broken political systems, archaic institutions, and ultimately in the destruction of our home planet — the only solution, is to evolve.

To transcend older ways of thinking.

But to do so without annihilating each another.

This takes a new type of human being, one that is driven by a desire for true community and not by an oversized ego craving for control.

This is the type of human that I’m interested in bringing about en masse.

“Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable… every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals”

Martin Luther King Jr.

History is never prescribed.

We have the responsibility of creating a future worth inhabiting.

One assumption people tend to make about my faith in Jesus is that I must espouse some sort of grand pie in the sky thinking that defies all logic.

I don’t.

My belief in God does not include misusing the brain that He gave me. Personally, I enjoy thinking. I think we should all do a bit more of it. To me, the idea of predestination is largely a cop out for people who don't want to put the work in

I’m no theologian, in fact many of them will disagree with me here, but what I believe in is the idea that we all have a ‘calling’. Not really a destiny, more so a potential to reach for.

Though, I would also be disingenuous if I claimed that we all reached that calling. Or even, if we found it. Most of us simply stagger about this plane, wondering what to do from moment to moment.

Never really choosing which direction to go, but rather allowing the 'current' of current culture to influence us, despite the cost to our souls.

The thing is, we have free will that's been granted to us.

Meaning, we can choose to not just ‘go with the flow’.

Which is why for the past year, I’ve been making the case for us to grow up and begin making those tough choices. Not for me... but for YOU.

You need to begin to choose what is actually best for you, based on a deep understanding of who you are — rejecting what others “think”.

Three… People are neither ‘good’ or ‘bad’; just different levels of broken

“Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”

William Shakespeare

What my boy Willie understood at a granular level, is a truth that many of us have yet to fully grasp.

That being — ‘good’ and ‘bad’ are both relative terms that have no roots in objectivity…

That is, outside of a standard.

That standard, often being our puny brains.

Here’s the thing (and, if you are an atheist this part may be for you) there is no such thing as “good” unless we can measure reality against something which we can all agree.

To be sure, same thing goes for “bad”, there’s simply no such thing.

Like… If a tiger kills a deer for lunch, is that ‘bad’?

No. It simply is.

The same rule goes for almost anything. You cannot make the claim that anything is good without also deciding you are now the new standard bearer. (i.e. God)

The Holocaust, something which we can all agree was pretty fucking terrible, is (according to an atheist) nothing more than the universe weeding out bad genes…

That doesn’t sound right.

In this case, we need a collective standard with which to measure objective reality.

Otherwise we’re just babbling on, trying to gain brownie points with the latest political movement. Boring, and dangerous.

In my experiences, the only answer which makes any sense, is if we all decide to place our existence under the umbrella of an Ultimate Judge; and there can only be one, but He would have to know everything for this whole system to work.

So…

If we want “goodness” to prevail, then it’s pretty important we all agree on what “goodness” is and that we dedicate ourselves to walking in lockstep with it.

Or at least acknowledging it.

The answer is simple really.

Just look at the word good and take out an “o”.

Psalms 82:6 says something that I think its pretty radical, “You are gods…”

…so in this case, we have the potential to be conduits of virtually unlimited levels of goodness in a world that is teetering on collective disillusionment.

Please, don’t misinterpret me, when I say we’re gods, I mean that we are derivatives of THE GOD; not the original - but we sure can sure become mini ones.

Not Big G, little g.

Still cool though.

And to me, this is essentially what it means to create.

To accept your role as child of The Creator, and to make dope shit in the process.

“This is your world.

You’re the creator

Find freedom on this canvas

Believe, that you can do it,

Cause you can do it.

You can do it.”

Bob Ross

We can tap into our natural God-given abilities and effectively shift reality to the degree in which our talents allow. The more we hone our skills, the greater the degree to which we can create something worth keeping around for a while.

According to scripture, we are His “hands and feet” — meaning we can inhabit a place of power and freedom when we decide to align our will with His.

Unfortunately –

We are also full of pride, and base desires.

This means we can decide instead to inhabit the realm of our ego and be opposed to Th-e Go-d in an attempt to establish our own will upon the world, instead of facilitating His.

Unfortunately, this never ends well.

Ask Satan. He’s been running this thing on earth for some time now, all the while trying to get any and everyone to buy in on the lie that they can be God (see Adam and Eve).

The irony is, we can… but not in the way in which he presents it.

(i.e. “Big G”)

So yes, you can be infinitely good.

But in that, lies dormant the equivalent potential for us to be infinitely evil.

You can only be as awesome as you can be shitty.

Think about it.

A person with otherworldly intellect can either become a force of good for humanity and elevate the collective (like an Einstein)

…or, decide to use their abilities for furthering selfish agendas (like a Hitler).

Free will baby.

Can’t lie… sometimes I wonder why He even gave it to us.

Four… We are spiritual beings having a human experience, NOT the other way around.

Actually… I do know why He gave it to us.

Because true love can only be had on the basis of uncoerced selection.

If I’m forced into doing what is right, then that action has been naturally absolved of all its ‘goodness’. I’m no longer making a real decision to choose what is best, I’m simply acting from a place of compulsion.

This leads us back to the nature of reality.

Because since free will enables humanity to accept what they ‘see’ and dub it as real, some of us are in for a rude awakening.

Honestly, ask anyone who has tripped on DMT, or taken a strong dose of ‘shrooms…

This it ain’t everything boss.

Not even close.

There is definitely something else out here, and I can’t lie — I don’t claim to know exactly what (or who) it is…

I mean. I have an idea, but I can’t really know.

My experiences tell me that there is something else at play in our universe, only — I can't prove anything empirically to anyone but myself.

So, in this instance I’ll defer to others who may be more directly exposed and well versed in the spirit realm than I currently am.

Namely, witches.

(also my celestial fam — can’t lie, that astrology stuff is intriguing)

Because unless you’re living under a rock, you know that Wicca, or organized witchcraft, is making quite the comeback in our culture.

I believe this is due in part to a collective ignorance, and reluctant awareness to the real powers at be. Leaving a space for those willing and able to exploit that ignorance to materially increase their own dominion over people and things.

The political elites have been lying to us about the nature of reality for some time now, and if some “regular” folks are able to manipulate their world in a way that suits em…

why not?

Sounds appealing. Sure, maybe self-serving.

But, appealing nonetheless. Especially when you consider the fact that everyone is doing it

I’m not here to argue or cast aspersions — actually, wanted to give my witches some props.

Wicca and similar spiritual practices aren’t rooted in any one specific tradition, and thus, they have the unique ability to expose our dying western world to the reality of spiritual forces at play in our universe.

Let’s be real.

Christianity (bent on control, rigidity, and religious dogma) has succesfully alienated many of my generation. If truth has been what you're after, the American church in all its judgmental glory was likely not the place you were going find it.

For that, I’ve got to apologize on behalf of my fault-finding, grace-lacking Christian brothers and sisters… and for myself as well. Frankly I'm a terrible advocate.

So, I’m sorry we aren't better at showing you what Jesus was really like.

I think that instead of reforming ourselves into His image, we fell into the trap of reforming Him into our own — rejecting a generation of truth seekers in the process.

Here's the reality, there is far more to all 'this' than what meets the eye.

On this we can agree.

The Buddha understood as well, hence the infatuation with meditation.

I’m sure many fellow Yogis have come to understand this truth — we are not our bodies.

In fact, these bodies may be the least important part of our true identities, although the most apparent at this stage of our existence.

Where Buddha stopped in his journey, was at a place called nirvana.

For all intensive purposes - this is the eastern equivalent of what many today call ego death.

The idea seems simple enough. Primarily, to rid yourself of all desire by “blowing out” the candle of want, and existing apart from this (obviously) broken and sinful world.

It's compelling...

But it’s no fun.

Plus, it doesn’t answer the question of why we’re here.

Like, here. On Earth.

Where we have the ability to taste food, read books, and have sex –

is that all really just a big ruse? A tease that we’re somehow supposed to ignore for 70 years or so?

I’m not sure…

I think, if there’s a God and He put us here, that He intended for us to enjoy it.

I just also think that our world today is marred beyond recognition and no longer resembles the perfect environment in which we were originally placed to thrive and multiply.

Both can be true.

The correct answer?

Pray

But how?

It’s a lot like meditation, actually.

Except, instead of focusing on yourself — you focus on the source.

What I call ‘me focused me-ditation’ seems to be all the rage in our self-obsessed, self-absorbed, selfie induced culture of “me, me, me, me”.

But hey, at least it’s a start.

When you’re ready to graduate to something more meaningful, I suggest trying to talk to the being who created you. Just try it, one good time. It’s a trip in itself, and you don’t even need drugs.

Just humility, and honesty.

“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.”

Jesus

Only one thing… you’ve gotta actually seek.

None of that “repeat a couple words and see what happened” mess.

Though that might work the first few times… (did for me, at least*)

*and I think it’s because He wanted me to keep going. It’s like beginners’ luck, or a teacher letting the new kid be line leader.

In order to really grow and align with THE GOD of the universe, one needs to spend a bit more time talking to Him, and a bit less time listening to guided meditation apps that know absolutely nothing about your soul.

(I’m not knocking — if that’s where you are, keep going. I personally love the breathing bubble on that ‘Calm’ app. Just know, there’s another level to this.)

Five… Life is NOT a Series of Unfortunate Events, but of Intentional Clues.

Humor me for a second.

If God is real and Creation is God’s…

Then we are not accidents, and neither is this existence. Everything that happens “to” us, is actually meant to become part “of” us. If only we would let them run their course.

Problem is, not everything that happens is necessarily ‘good’. In fact, most of it isn’t (at least, from our perspective)

This isn’t because God hates you — in fact it’s because He loves you so much, that He wants you to grow up.

He desires to expand your perspective, and you can only do that through experiencing pain.

Ever watch the movie Fight Club? The scene above illustrates perfectly the truth I’m trying to convey. Growth only comes via pain. ‘Tis life — we just have to learn to deal with it, and to struggle well.

Think; if we always got what we wanted and never had to push ourselves past any limit we deemed too 'uncomfortable', where would that leave us?

I think you know the answer.

So, begin to reframe. Like today.

Whatever comes your way — whether that be a tough situation, a difficult person, or a set of new choices. Understand that it is not random.

Then, understand that you have the power to either grow from it, or to fall back and stay the same.

Quit saying “why is this happening to me”

Start saying “what is this supposed to teach me”

“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there”

Anonymous

So — Yes.

There is a God.

And He set things up very particularly.

I can already hear the counterarguments to though;

“if everything is for a reason then why …blablabla…”

Okay, well to me the evidence is overwhelming. I think you just don’t want to look.

We’ve talked about the interconnectedness of life, and the order of our universe, but maybe that didn’t convince you.

How about this;

You’re a star. But you’re also a miracle.

Scientists estimate that the probability of your being born is about one in 400 trillion.

That 400 million billion’s

And what about our ability to survive on earth?

Because it just so happens…

…that in our extremely vast universe, we were plopped on the only planet we’ve found so far with liquid water on the surface, a medium sized sun, at a distance from which prevents us either burning up or freezing over, with an atmosphere that protects organic life from all the harmful rays while letting in the good ones, and possesses magnetic poles and a gravitational constant which keep us relatively upright existing on the particular timeline that has caused us to be right now…

(and if you go ask a cosmologist, this doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of crazy in terms of our position in the universe)

And that DNA in your body?

It’s LITERALLY a LANGUAGE.

Cells talking to cells, communicating with the whole, allowing you to read the words on your screen right now, imbueing your very being with the qualities and characteristics that make you, YOU.

Like, if you saw writing on the wall of a cave, or a message in a bottle — you would probably assume that intelligent beings were present at some point to construct that message.

But for some reason, we see writing of an infinitely more complex variety in the very building blocks of our bodies…

and assume it was the cause of random chance… ?

Intentionality is everywhere, all you have to do is look.

Six… Love and Truth are Inseparable

Love lasts forever, and truth is eternal.

Go read 1 Corinthians 13 and you’ll begin to see where I’m coming from.

Patience, kindness, temperance, etc… these are qualities that are not easily replicable.

In fact, once you put them all together — they’re impossible to replicate.

They simply become love.

When a thing becomes replaceable, it’s value plummets.

This is basic economics.

So, being able to replicate something is a good indication that the thing has no real staying power. On the other hand, the more unique a thing is, the higher its value.

It’s like a marriage proposal.

(in a perfect world)

The reason a man is supposed to buy a ring that costs three months salary is not because women want all men to go broke… (at least, I don’t think so.)

But rather, because it signals something that other men can’t, or won’t — replicate.

If all you needed to do was give her flowers, then every man could easily pretend that they also want to make a lifelong commitment — thus, the value of such a gesture would be rendered virtually meaningless.

How could Sally tell who really loved her if nothing that differentiates the guy with the daisies from the guy with the lilies?

The only way a woman can discern with some level of certainty how real mans level of commitment, is if that man gives her something of actual value that cannot be easily replicated.

You feel me?

Becasue true love is something that can’t be replaced

Therefore, it’s lasting.

And truth is just as eternally important.

Time has a way of revealing things. We know this innately because we see it every day.

A liar has to constantly change targets, because once they're found out — there is nothing left to gain from that ‘relationship’.

Essentially, a liar’s existence is a temporal one.

They have little to no staying power with any given person (depending on how effective the lie) but in time, even the best are found out.

Ask Bernie.

(Madoff, not Sanders.)

My argument here is that the only thing that could possibly last forever, is something that doesn’t mess with the eternal laws of existence, that fundamental law being — ultimate truth.

Truth is the only thing that is free and pure of any temporal constraints.

So, the closer to get to that truth, the more we are in lock step with a universe that tends to reward those who get it.

Think of it this way -

If the wind hitting your sails wants you to go due north, it becomes very difficult after awhile to go in any other direction.

Sure, you can steer the wheel — but in time — your arms will get tired.

And the ship will return to its original orientation.

Same goes for truth.

The further away we get from it, the more energy we need to expend in order to keep up appearances.

Why do you think we even call it that? An appearance?

The very name to me implies impermanence. A brief stay. Here today, gone tomorrow.

Is that what you want to spend your relatively short life on Earth pursuing?

I say — just let the ship go north.

In fact, encourage it to do so.

Then you’ll find a destination worth staying at a lot faster than if you try and have it your way… using outdated maps, exhausting your willpower, and ruining relationships along the way.

(Talking to myself here)

Seven… The only way to win, is to seek both truth and love recklessly

Truth

Remember, time reveals all, so in time whatever lie you’ve adopted will be exposed.

The solution here is not to lie more effectively, but to stop lying altogether.

First to yourself, then to others — but especially to God.

It’s not a good look.

Even if you don’t get found out soon, or maybe you make it a full lifetime, still - future generations will undoubtedly see you as a fraud.

This internet thing really changed the game.

Your footprint on humanity is a lot more permanent than you think. Also, internet anthropologists will definitely exist in the future. So no hiding.

Your best bet is to pursue truth and live accordingly.

Build your life upon a firm foundation, then you don’t have to worry about storms

(Matt 7:24).

Attach your will with that of ‘the universe’ and you literally CAN’T lose.

Love

As for pursuing love, I think it’s one of those things that you shouldn't really force.

In fact, what I’ve found is that the more you try and force it, the more you tend to build up secret resentment within your heart.

So really…

You should just stop trying.

Seriously. Quit trying to be nice, and instead, aim to be real.

Cuss the homie out (if that’s how you really feel).

Break up with ol’ girl.

Cut off the homie that's been sneak dissing.

Respectfully tell momma that you're not feeling her vibe right now.

The point is to stop holding on to toxic emotions in the name of ‘trying’.

Trying all the time is the most tiring thing ever.

Especially when everybody thinks you’re probably lying anyway — so, just tell the truth and roll with it.

Once you get past that, you become free from all the negative energy that was being stored inside you. It’s in this freedom, that you now have a choice.

You can choose love, but not from a place of compulsion.

Rather, because you want to.

Anything else, and you’re just resting on fake platitudes to console your sense of self, helping you to ‘feel’ like you’re a ‘good person’

(remember — you’re not.)

So really, all you’ve got to do is pursue truth in earnest.

Everything else will come.

Not saying it’ll be easy…

But, things tends to fall in place once you decide to stop buying into all the bullshit society is trying to sell you.

And nothing worth having is easy, anyway.

Salvador Dali “Geopoliticus Child Watching the Birth of the New Man”

Eight… The only reason we have to seek truth, is if we recognize it as ‘good’ over the long term

This eighth suggestion was a tough one for me to get to, can't lie.

As someone willing to visit hell in order to find what’s real, I had the (false) assumption that others would be willing to go with me.

Really I didn’t get it — why aren’t other people pursuing truth?

Worse… why are they clowning me for doing so?

But now, I think I understand.

Because, sometimes the lie seems better than the truth.

“Long is the way and hard,

that out of Hell leads up to light.”

John Milton, Paradise Lost

For this one, I found that the only real incentive humans have for bursting their own bubble of deceit is to recognize they’re in a long term game in which truth will ultimately come out on top anyway.

But, how do we choose to pursue truth when everything around us says to stay put? It’s a lot easier said than done — I can assure you.

But for me, it starts with believing that Jesus is who He said He was. (John 14:6)

Problem is, I don’t know your life.

So it’s hard to tell you with any real confidence that it will be better for you in the short term if you decide to believe Him. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’ll suck for awhile.

Remember Matt 7:24?

It’s a parable Jesus gave, talking about two men. One who built his home on the rock, and the other who built his on the sand.

I’m sure you’re intelligent enough to see where this is going…

You’ve built a skyscraper on a cracked foundation.

And, unfortunately there’s only one eventuality, and it ain't pretty — thing is, nobody wants to knock down the pretty building they’ve spent years slaving away at.

I get it. I really do.

I was married for three years, and was in that relationship for an entire decade. You really think I wanted to let everybody in on the fact that all that time spent together was largely fraudulent?

Hellllll no.

But — I needed truth.

And so, I had to begin that process.

To be fair, it was one hell of a blow to my ego, because I really thought I was a good person, or at least a decent one (lol).

You see, I didn’t have the right perspective.

But neither do you.

We can only see what is now… and even that is up for interpretation. You have to remember we are talking about eternity here.

And forever is a mighty long time. So really, what is three years?

Honestly — even a lifetime can’t match up to what is in store for us if we let go of the lies we’ve been holding on to.

The only thing is, YOU have to be the one to believe that.

Otherwise, you’ll continue on in your limited ideas of life — holding on to your hurt and disappointment because it’s all you have . in the meantime, you leak on to everyone around you, all because it’s “too hard” to shape up now.

Time to get over yourself boss.

“Later”

A lie we tell far too often.

And you know it’s a lie — because you’ll never ‘feel’ like taking a wrecking ball to your life. You’ve just gotta recognize it as necessary and do the damn thing already.

God can see what is. Across all of eternity.

So… his truth is much higher than yours or mine. In fact, it’s perfect.

Period.

Our timeline of evidence to work with is laughable when we take into account that the big bang occurred 14 billion years ago. That Homo Sapiens only burst on the scene about 300 thousand years ago, and that our direct ancestors who used tools and began manipulating their environment to a significant degree only arrived around 40,000 years back.

Not that long in terms of cosmic history.

In fact, if all of existence were compared to a marathon, or 26.2 miles.

Then, modern man has jogged for about 6.4 centimeters.

Not miles.

Not feet.

Not even inches.

And still, we who've been around for a few decades possess the audacity to feign lethargy.

You’re tired? After a millimeter?

Stop it.

There is only one truth.

(Sorry relativists, but the whole ‘everyone has their own truth’ argument doesn’t even make sense by your own standards. If you can categorically claim no truth is ultimate… then that very statement can be dispensed with.)

Oops.

Nine… The only way to know that God is Good, is to experience Him firsthand

I referenced this already, but it’s worth restating. Also, I don't want you to believe me, I just want you to look for yourself.

Only no half assed searching, please.

Remember when you were a kid with some map showing where all the gold was hidden? If you really wanted to find that treasure, there was no way you were going to give up after scanning the living room.

No, you were ready to go outside and dig in places you’ve never been before. Yet, this is rarely how we go about looking for the only real treasure in this universe worth finding.

The treasure of true self.

Even me, I can admit, am not the best at finding things. Ask my ex-wife.

So, personally — I had to go back to basics in my walk with God, and only earlier this year despite being raised in the church my entire life, was I able to hear from God in any real way. Why? Because I began to look.

Everything else up to that point was just appearances and rule following.

No looking, just nonchalant scanning. (which, is how we tend to ‘look’ for God today.)

So is it really God whose gone missing?

Or is what's missing our collective will to try and find him?

In our intellectual indignance, we can’t allow ourselves to become like the “little children” who Jesus said would ultimately inherit the Kingdom of Heaven. The kids, not the adults.

It’s their honest curiosity and innate humility that allows them to find truths us grown folk are too busy scoffing at to even consider.

To be sure, I already know most of you won’t take any of this advice.

It’s almost as if, you assume you’re just too smart for all this.

Thing is, you're not.

Only some folks are so insolent, they don’t even know that yet — so they just meander around the subject of God, looking to poke holes and relying on a legalistic framework of reality, all to prove themselves right in the process.

I think your ego is in the way.

go and kill that motherf-

Ten… The only way we can free up God to do some rehabilitative work in our lives, is if we release the cynicism in our hearts.

As big as you may think your heart is, it’s not infinite.

There’s only so much space in it, and if you’re busy harboring deceit or malice…

Then there’s exactly a 0% chance that Jesus will come in and join you.

GOD personifies the ultimate GOOD.

Therefore, he simply won’t inhabit places that are fundamentally bad. It doesn’t mesh with His nature.

It’s like asking you to go and live in a volcano to hang out with a friend who’s unwilling to leave. I’m sure you could figure it out, technology is getting stupid these days.

But, would you even want to?

Or, would you rather invite your volcano dwelling buddy up out of that lava, into a space where life is much more beautiful and free?

Basically…

Our souls are dirty, and the solution most religions prescribe is “be good, then go to God”

Problem with this strategy, is that it only leads to more internal suffering.

Because none of us are good (remember).

Islam, Buddhism, Judaism, and others — all say virtually the same thing.

“Follow the rules, then God will transform you”

Christianity has a patently dissimilar response;

“Come as you are.”

Jesus has already cleaned you up my dude, all you have to do is trust Him.

It’s really simple. Just, it’s not easy. Trust me, I'm still struggling to let Him in fully.

If you want to level up in a real way, you need to stop trying. It seems utterly counterintuitive, I know.

But trying only leads to failure and frustration.

What you should do instead, is submit.

Submission to a will that is good and perfect, can only lead to freedom and peace of mind.

The word ‘submit’ may sound dirty in our 50 Shades of Gray induced culture. But really — it comes from the Latin verb submittere, meaning to let go.

What God wants, is for you to simply let go of whatever confusion you're holding on to, and allow Him to do the hard work of scrubbing your soul clean.

Fact is, we can’t do it.

Even high ranking Buddhist Monks and members of the Roman Catholic Priesthood mess up from time to time. (Ok, Catholics mess up a lot.)

And if they can’t remain perfect, you sure as hell can’t be expected to

Still, at the end of the day He’s not compromising on His goodness.

But He is willing to let us in the party if we’d only admit we need Him.

Jesus said, “Be perfect as your heavenly father is perfect”

…and this sounds like a crazy thing to ask of anyone, especially for fundamentally broken beings like us.

But that’s when it’s understood outside of it's proper context. His isn’t an invitation to strive harder. Rather, it's a request to recognize that what He is asking is utterly impossible without His assistance.

The bar is set ridiculously high, but for a reason — to expose our inability to achieve it.

“with GOD all things are possible”

(NOT… ‘with self-determination’)

Get it?

Rule following only leads to more religion.

And frankly I’m tired of religion.

Its old, and its unnecessary.

Mostly full of symbolic gestures to help folks see God and become better people.

but at the end of the day, it’s still a regular human being who creates and facilitates these processes. Meaning you are expected to rely on some sort of professional rule follower to gain proximity to God.

I’m just saying…

I’d rather the skip the line at the grocery store and go directly to the water fountain across the street.

When you love someone, you naturally want to do right by them.

To me, this is when the real party starts.

Because instead of just doing things with a particular angle or agenda in mind, you’re truly freed up to do good simply because you want to — that is your true self is beginning to show.

And, that’s all that God really wants.

For YOU to become YOU.

To do good from a place of response, and not responsibility.

Becasue it’s not an act anymore. It's become who you are.

A vessel of pure love and light, remember — you’re literally a star.

So, whatever you want to name it. Be it ego death, elevation of consciousness, or growth of the indwelling spirit –

Doesn’t really matter to me.

As long as you are earnestly searching for what is real and true, I believe strongly that we’ll all end up in the same place.

I’ll like to let the facts speak for themselves.

Though, if you want a head start… I personally suggest picking up a Bible reading through the Gospel of Mark. Don't worry, its a short one.

Last thing...

Dont follow me.

Follow truth instead.

Hope to see you in heaven.