Effective Communication with Kindness

The above quote is one that I hold close to my heart and work to make sure I practice every day. As I see clients and as I interact with the community.?

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As this post is about communication of all sorts, I will add that in my career before going full time seeing clients I was also a regional trainer.

?I taught a course on communication and it was very impactful for all of the managers that I had the privilege of sharing the material with. I had gone through the course first as a participant and was beyond thrilled when I was able to share the importance of effective communication with others.?

I do want to start off by saying that since that time I was also certified as a Master Practitioner of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) and one of the presuppositions of NLP is that the meaning of any communication (you give) is the results you get.?

One more time…the meaning of any communication is the result you get. If you find that you are communicating some information or opinion to another person and they “don't get it” or maybe take offense, then you have to step back and adjust how you are communicating.?

We can sometimes get frustrated that they are not receiving the information as we feel we presented it or maybe we can not imagine it not making sense to them. That is the difference between a communicator and a great communicator.?

Being able to take responsibility for the conversation and not just looking at it from a 50/50 point of view. Knowing that if you want to get the results you want, you may have to adjust your message.?

I also want to add another view point on the quote from Jung. When you are talking with another human being, be just another human being.?

I will also add that in my career I worked as part of an HR team so I realize there are considerations and legalities around direct communication with others in the same company.?

Yet, you can always find a humanistic way to address people, even if that includes having to discipline someone or even let them go. The reality is that you have an even bigger investment in treating people with dignity and respect in those moments.?

To paraphrase; Be kind whenever it is possible. It is always possible.?

Stepping back into global communication, please do not confuse direct and specific (honest) communication for being rude. I work with clients that are confused when it comes to being your authentic self and saying what you want to say, being honest and being heard.?

That does not mean (saying it again because it is the most important takeaway) being less than kind or being “abrasive”. The greatest communicators are those that are the kindest and you can feel and tell they care about not only the message but also they care about you.?

Remember the saying, People don't care about how much you know until they know how much you care.?

As you look at your current situation ask yourself is there a place where you could get better results with how/what you are communicating??

If the answer is yes, please take a step back and ask yourself if you are being just another human when you are sharing your message.?

And for the record, I have managed teams of up to 200 people and I realize it may seem like a large hill to climb (you may even be thinking of a particular person or situation) but with the right mindset and tools you can become an amazing communicator and get the results you want and be seen as kind and compassionate.?