Edge: A weekly wisdom post

The word that came together for me this week was EDGE. When I look up the definition, I found the outside limit of an object, area, or surface; a place or part farthest away from the center of something and move gradually, carefully, or furtively in a particular direction.

Starting at the edge of your fingertips

I heard this statement during a group meeting around a shared experience learning about trauma-informed leadership. We talked about that edge of making change where we have passion and influence.

In other words, we can’t make a change if we’re first not deeply passionate about it. That goes for internal and external change. If I’m not passionate, it will be easy to fall back on old behaviors and excuses for why change isn’t working.

The second part was that we must have some influence on others. They have to believe in and trust in what we are bringing to the table. Because change comes with resistance, the same people with whom we have influence may also need us to hold them in their discomfort.

Working at the edge can be so mentally and physically demanding. Therefore, it is important to have grounding and gratitude practices that what is here is enough. These practices must be in place to help our nervous systems calm and relax to expand our capacity for edge work. We gradually and carefully move in the direction we desire past the edge.

“Do your inner work so you can approach the edge with more ease.”

What is your edge – where passion and influence meet to make change? What practices will you use to help your nervous system settle after important edge work?

Crossroads in life

On Wednesday, I had the opportunity to participate in The Center for Purposeful Leadership’s Essential Conversations. This week’s topic was entitled “Confronting Our Freedom” with Peter Block and Peter Koestenbaum. One of the things Block said that struck me as an edge was “I can't be explained by my history or story – it’s just meaning I make of my life. There is another story and I’m up for it.”

My interpretation is that we have the freedom to define who we are. We don’t have to let past mistakes and painful events define who we are. We always have the possibility to broaden our story. We simply must make a choice to do so.

The idea of choice is me standing at the edge and looking two ways. I can either back up and operate where I am familiar. I can also move forward toward the unfamiliar but with the hope of something even more spectacular.

When we went into breakout groups, our question was; what is the crossroad you face at this stage of the game? I loved how another person in my triad re-framed this prompt as; what wants to find me? He further stated that after asking this question, we must remain quiet enough to recognize and hear the answer.

Being on the edge requires us to pause, to be still for a moment to listen to what is calling. The edge asks us to listen with all of our hearts, bodies, and minds to know where to take the best next step.

What is calling you from the edge? Are you quiet enough to hear what wants to find you?

Deliver truth with love

This week I also had the pleasure of attending the Women in Systems Thinking Speaker Series with Marta Ceroni, the Co-Director of the Academy for Systems Change. I can’t summarize the whole conversation, so I want to pick out what I felt was an “edge” piece.

Ceroni said that reflecting on Donella “Dana” Meadows, an early systems thinker,?she believed that Meadows was at crossroads "where she actually made different choices to respond to the reality that she was living through and seeing." Meadows embodied hope which is hard.

Ceroni went on to say that Meadows believed in the “importance of how to deliver truth with love so that it becomes inspiring and welcoming and inclusive.” To be hopeful we need the right tools, but we also need to engage our hearts to take the leap. We must “hold truth, with all its pain and complexity.” We also need to have spaces convened with heart, respect, and dignity for others who might have different beliefs and opinions.

The edge piece here is always having space for my truth but being open to the truth of others. We need to show up for each other, willing to take in thoughts and ideas that might be completely foreign. In that space, it's not necessarily that we have to completely give up our truth but we may find resonance with one another which is where that hope for change lies.

What edges between head and heart exist for you? How do you hold multiple truths with love?

I am an edge person

I realized in recent years that I am an edge person. That edge farthest from the center is where I find comfort. It’s a place where I don’t get bored sitting in the same old places, projects, and even behaviors. I can see where I want to head with excitement. My current internal work is to sit in stillness at the edge long enough to become clearer on the next step.

In the past, I think I’ve just taken the leap. Because I was leaping without really sorting this through, I know I’ve caused pain for myself and for others. I can keep living at the edge but am doing more reflection and mindfulness practices to help see the path more clearly.

Where is your self-leadership edge?

DM me if you want to know more about my Leadership of Self Series or Mindfulness and Compassion which can help you develop your leadership edge.

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