Echoes of Graduation Gratitude

We are inundated this time of year with the posts of anxious parents, like myself, feeling the bittersweet emotions of graduation. AppleMusic has even created playlists dedicated to ‘all the feels’ of this monumental day.??

At the same time, I’m also haunted by my own experiences as the wife (now widow) of a high school principal whose graduation day speech I would review each June. In his commencement address each year, my husband, Dr. Sean Hughes, would talk about how graduation is a multifaceted experience, rich with emotion and significance, marking the end of one journey and the beginning of another, and he always emphasized how one’s character is the most valuable asset to take with you on that journey.

This year, our oldest son graduates from high school. And, as I watch my son prepare to move forward into his next chapter, with the absence of my husband so present, I reflect back on Sean's words to thousands of students before, and I can't help but think that he was talking to Jack (and me) all along--preparing us for this day of transition.

The focus of Sean's last graduation address to the class of 2021 was simple. It was about moving into a new phase while being thankful. To thank those who helped you get to where you are today, and to thank those along the way of your new path.

In his last graduation speech, Sean said, "My message to you today is simple: Always say ‘thank you’ -- take the time to appreciate life and the people in it. Nice people say ‘thank you!’ Nice people listen to others and appreciate their opinions and feedback. Nice people stick around to make sure the job is done. Nice people are appreciated. Others are thankful for nice people. See how that works?"

He later continued, "And finally, in a world filled with questions – this is my favorite question to ask: ‘How can I help?’ I can only hope that you are interested in helping others.?If you ask ‘how’ you can help, you are asking, with humility, for direction. And you are recognizing that others are experts in their own lives or areas and that they will likely help you as much as you help them. In a time where so many people compromise their kindness in the rush to be first, they miss out on the real joys and rewards. Don’t miss out on the joy of being grateful and kind. These simple things can define your character. Come on – you knew I was going to say something about character!"

Sean concluded, "LM’s principal in the early part of the 20th century was a man named Professor Charles Pennypacker.?Ironically, he was a bald guy just like me. I read in one yearbook that he would tell students, 'Let your character serve as an example for others as you make your mark on the world. Let your character define your legacy!' That still goes for today!

I will conclude with the very same creed that Principal Charles Pennypacker closed his speech with in his address to the class of 1928:

‘I will be true, for there are those who trust me

I will be pure, for there are those who care.

I will be strong, for there is much to suffer,

I will be brave for there is much to bear.

I will be a friend to all – to foe and friendless,

I will be giving and forget the gift.

I will be humble, for I know my weakness.

I will look up and laugh and love and lift.’

Live by this creed and there is no doubt that you will live gratefully as a person with strong character. Finally, I wish you all the best of luck in the future. As I have said many times – it has been an honor to be your Principal and even though that role ends tonight – it will always be an honor to be a friend."

I am fortunate to have had an incredible husband, and leader of leaders as my children's father. A man with character and conviction, who walked the walk. His advice will echo in my mind this June as I watch our oldest son walk across the stage, and I will be grateful as I grieve his absence and my son’s childhood. His legacy will continue in not only my children, but in all the students who he inspired to have gratitude over the years. And, his kindness will be what people remember when think of him because it is feelings that impact people the most. Thank YOU, Sean.