Eccedentesiast (n.)

Someone who hides pain behind a smile. A person who fakes a smile.

[AKA Smiling Depression]

"I lied and I said I was busy. I was busy; But not in a way most people understand.?

I was busy taking deeper breaths... ??

I was busy silencing toxic thoughts... ??

I was busy calming a racing heart... ??

I was busy telling myself I’m okay… ??

I was suffering but no one knew that ??

because I hid my pain someplace deep inside me.

because the last thing I wanted was pity.

I’m not as STRONG as I look, and I’ve learned that it’s ok to not be ok... "

(Happy 30th Birthday)

This is what I wrote on my 30th birthday. This was right after I had gone through a mild depression. Believe me, it was not a 30-something life crisis.

If we look at our daily lives closely, we realize we're constantly explaining ourselves to others.

"Why did you leave your stable 9-to-5 job?"

"Why did you end that long-term relationship?"

"Why aren't you getting married?"

They want answers to why we’re not “NORMAL” like everybody else.

They want answers, yet they have no idea what we've experienced. ??

So we explain ourselves.... A LOT.

Sometimes, we try to make an honest attempt in the hope that someone understands WHY we did WHAT we did. ??

Other times, we’re just looking for APPROVAL. We’re scared that people will get mad at us, so we explain our way out. It’s a scary way to live, but it seems like the safest way to survive.

It’s a cycle of explanation and NEVER-ENDING pain. ??

But it’s time to set boundaries. It’s OUR life. It's OUR choice. It's OUR decision.

If they cannot accept it — that’s on them.

We are the ones steering the wheel of our lives and no outsider should have the power to influence our plans and decisions. Repeat it again: NO ONE!

Beautiful things happen when we listen to ourselves more often. When we stop looking outside for all the approval, we eventually start to SING more loudly and DANCE more freely... ???

If you've read this far, THANK YOU. ??

As a BURNOUT survivor and a BURNOUT coach, I'm here to support you. I don’t believe in cheerleading or promising you miracles. But I believe in the power of mindfulness and self-awareness and I'll be there to help you find BALANCE again.

You are NOT alone on this journey. DM me and let's talk.... ??

You are all amazing and we’re all trying our best - and that's what matters. ??

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(Repost this ?? if you think it'd help your friends)