E245:Beyond Desire: How to Discern What's Truly Good for You

As leaders, we're driven by ambition and the pursuit of achievement. But in the pursuit of success, how do we ensure our goals and aspirations serve our genuine well-being?

It's easy to confuse what we want with what we think we should want.

Societal expectations, competitive pressures, and past experiences can cloud our judgment. The flashy sports car or the corner-office title might seem enticing, but do they truly serve your needs beyond the surface?

Here's how to dig deeper:

• The Body Check-In: Desire often manifests as excitement or tension. Check in with your body's response when you envision attaining your goal. Does it spark a sense of relaxation and ease, or does it leave you feeling tight-chested with underlying unease? Your body often holds the wisdom your mind can't grasp.
• The Future Movie: Play the scenario out in your mind. Imagine yourself a few years down the road, having achieved your goal. What does your life look like? What emotions dominate? Does this vision spark genuine fulfillment or a lingering sense of something still missing?
• Align with Values: Your core values are your compass. Does this goal resonate with who you are at your best? Does it support the kind of person you want to be, both in your personal and professional life? Misalignment with your values leads to dissonance and burnout.
• The Joy Factor: True desires have a sense of playfulness and intrinsic motivation. Would you still pursue this path even without external rewards or recognition? The journey itself should be a meaningful part of the equation.

Discomfort is Part of It!

Growth often requires stepping outside your comfort zone.

Don't confuse the discomfort of healthy stretch with the discomfort of deep internal resistance.

Remember: Sometimes, what's best for you means letting go of goals that no longer serve your growth – even those you've invested in heavily. Sunk costs are a fallacy;

prioritize your future well-being over clinging to an expired ideal.

Ultimate rule: If it does not create deep fulfillment, and bring you and your loved ones inner peace and joy, then it is not good for you.

What goals are you currently pursuing? How do you discern if they're genuinely 'good' for you?

Michael - Get used to different!

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