Dumb Startup Marketing Advice, Liquid Death, Distribution does not win, The Marketing Mistake (Most) GOP Candidates Made This Week, & more ?????
Friday Edition. Sponsored by Bad Tuna.

Dumb Startup Marketing Advice, Liquid Death, Distribution does not win, The Marketing Mistake (Most) GOP Candidates Made This Week, & more ????

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Thanks for reading.

Welcome to Different.?

The (experimental) LI newsletter for entrepreneurs, creators and marketing leaders with a Different mind.

Sponsored by Bad Tuna Industries.

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I love dropping newsletters on Fridays.

Because all the experts say not too ??

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This “advice” is now gospel for many in the startup marketing world.

And it’s insane.

bad idea.

The “Me Disease” has taken over an entire generation of marketers & founders.

Customers do not care about our “journey”.

They care about themselves.

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Legendary marketing leaders, creators and category designers put the customer, her problems, her journey at the center of their work.

(why do we still have to make this clear in 2023?)

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?Liquid Death.

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Most people say this beverage company succeeded because it did a great job at branding.

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Legendary category design + branding


Yes, that’s true.

But.

Liquid Death did not win the category because it had a “cool” logo and “vibe” (although it did).

?It won the category because of category design.?

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In 2023, Liquid Death was the most followed beverage brand in the U.S. on TikTok because it designed a new category: canned water.?

The company called bullshit on the “plastic bottled water category” and proclaimed that cans are recyclable in a way plastic is not, with a simple message,

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“Death to plastic.”

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Liquid Death did not compete with Evian water.

Everything about Liquid Death was different, not better—including the category.?

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Liquid Death won, because canned water is different.

(not better)

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I love the "distribution wins" argument, that is the new gospel in the tech world.

Distribution is necessary.

Not sufficient.


Not so much, eh?
If you understood category design, you'd know better ??


?Facebook Threads might have had the greatest distribution advantage of all time.

And Threads is dead.

-Not different

-No category design

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Not so mucb

-Meghan Markle had the greatest distribution advantage of any podcaster in history.

And her podcast is dead.

-Not different

-No category design

And....not to be overly immodest, but... I’m a no-name/nobody (in very small niches) in the top 0.5% of podcasters.

Category Design works.

Booger!

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(this is in NO WAY political commentary…

.....this is marketing insight)

GOP (Monster) Marketing Debate Mistake.

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There is a powerful axiom in marketing.

“You don't punch down”

Pence, Christie, Haley & DeSantis all took big shots at a no-name 38 year old dude with zero political experience named Vivek Ramaswamy.

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As a result they (inadvertently) told 12.8 million Americans they are afraid of this guy. What (subtle but) loud message does it send to the American people when a former Vice President, Governor or UN Ambassador feel the need to take direct shots at a nubie?


The “expert” politicians might as well vemo-ed their campaign funds to Ramaswamy directly.

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Vivek Ramaswamy's popularity surges; raises more than $450,000 in first hour post debate

If Ramaswamy gets the nomination (or VP slot, or any other high-level post) he can thank his competition for taking the bait.

Punching down.

And raising him up.

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Have a great weekend.

Michigan cat's 16-inch tail earns Guinness World Record

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Stay legendary my friend,

Christopher Lochhead

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Copyright?Category Pirates, LLC

Public notification.

This newsletter has been shown to disappoint many.

The left lane, is the passing lane.

For the love of God.

Drivers in the passing lane being radically anti-American

Get the F out of the passing lane.


Most of the ideas, research, frameworks (and even big chunks of the writing) are as a direct result of (or completely lifted from) my partnership with Eddie Yoon & Katrina Kirsch ???? (aka Category Pirates)

(The stuff that sounds like it was published without parental supervision are not Kat or Eddie's fault)

Subscribe to Category Pirates (our real newsletter) here.

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Legal Warning From The State of California.

The creator of this (experimental) LI newsletter:

-can’t find his watch

(real, swiss-made watch, not one of those wrist robots that people call "watches")

-does not possess a GED

-was likely consuming libations

-was thrown out of school at 18

-is considered radically incompetent (by many)

-possess multiple learning differences (aka superpowers)


There are random (strategically??) placed spelling, grammar and formatting mistakes in this newsletter.

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If you’re a Qanon person, consider these strategic mistakes part of a secret code that unlocks the Federal Government servers, in Bumsquat Youdaho to the files that prove Big Foots are thriving.

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If you’re not a Qanon person, the errors herein exist because Lochhead is lazy… and wants to write in an unfettered, real(ish) time way and an editor would F that up.

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If you enjoy Different, please share this newsletter on LI now ??

(throw a brother a bone ?? mate)

(and as the French say it’s gratuitis)?

(share it ????)

Have you noticed how (sucking your will to live) boring most business newsletters (content) is.

And GPT has made it a f*k ton worse.

BTW, I know the LI algo

(the hip kids today call algorithms, algos...which is also Greek for pain? ??)

Doesn't seem to like me or swearing... so, share this thing & see if we humans can conquer the algo ??


Now, if you're not enjoying this (experimental) newsletter, you might get a little angry in your warrior if you consumed our?books,?paid/real newsletter,?and/or podcasts.

But if you like any of this, you might love the "real" stuff.

Ever see a naked dude blow dry his down belows at the gym?

(some things you can't unsee ??)


Have you ever seen a couple dozen rockstars play bass with Spinal Tap on their legendary heavy metal mega hit, “Big Bottom”.

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(Is this newsletter still going?)

(It's gotten highly unprofessional?)

Have your ever seen KD Lang perform Hallelujah at the Olympics?

Have you ever seen 1000 Italians play a Foo Fighters song?

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Ps. Check out our new #1 Bestseller (in Marketing & Startups)?“The 22 Laws of Category Design”

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You don't want to be the (only) person who did not read this book. This summer. Do ya? ??


Are you ready for a very different conversation about DEI, being out as a Queen person in business and the LGBTQ+ debate in America?

Check out this?podcast?with legendary author?James ( Jim ) Fielding?about his #1 bestselling book

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"All Pride, No Ego: A Queer Executive's Journey to Living and Leading Authentically"

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Debbie Harry was right.

Podcasts are the only media (left) for authentic (unedited) dialogue.

You might like this real dialogue podcast with my buddy Jon Bergoff on the power of questions.

Are you really still reading?....

(a lot of this is repetitive garbage... you'd never see any of this s*t in a McKinsey newsletter....

....but, imagine if you did ??... you'd think they'd been punked)

... this is the part of Different, that is like the very end of a movie...

….where some directors throw in crap-o-rama ...

(as we discussed earlier, everything -- pretty much --- is funnier with "o-rama" after it.....Apple-o-rama, Microsoft-o-rama, SAP-o-rama, In-n-Out-o-rama)


...for their own entertainment purposes, because they assume by this point, people have left the theater...

?...but for some reason you're still reading... and I'm still writing...

If you’re into Marketing here’s a podcast you might not like.

This newsletter really ties the room together.

Teach kids AI.

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Warning:

There will be repetitive content from time to to…because the creator of this newsletter will absolutely forget he already posted it…

….this is a feature, not a bug.

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Don’t crack eggs on your baby’s head.

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Hey, thanks for hanging out for the extra (silly) scooby snacks at the end...

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….let's hang out again soon ????????

Published by Category Pirates.

Sponsored By Bad Tuna Industries.

Makers of Bad Tuna Fragrances.

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Benjamin Moore

Major Account Executive at Datadog

1 年

Pure gold. Insights that are missed by the editors of Bloomberg, NYT, and WSJ. Love it, keep it up. Captain Mercury forever.

Dan Barry

Visionary Leader with Diversity of Experience across the Globe

1 年

Christopher Lochhead???? you are blunt, funny and fascinating w/ the Friday newsletters. I still read the CA disclaimer every week and laugh, basically b/c it it truthful and you “made it” by thinking #Differently. Appreciate learning from you.

Chuck Coxhead ????

My Life Is RF - Ready 48?? - RF Cables - Revenue Fuel - Speaker - Podcast Host - Author

1 年

Through a Category lens, Ramaswamy is an anomaly He is the one who is not wasting time attacking Trump On the contrary, he builds up Trump ...and we all know the Pepsi mistake when they spent millions constantly mentioning Coke So, what is the category for Vivek Ramaswamy? Is he the only one who is truly running for 2nd place? That would be a category choice.

Yasmin Cuesta

?? Helping businesses achieve digital growth through social media marketing. ??

1 年

Looking forward to reading the newsletter and learning from your unique perspective,

Drew Spencer Leahy ????

Brand marketing + Product Marketing for B2B | Marketing fundamentalist

1 年

Liquid death is a mediocre product in a hyper competitive market when you pull away the brand. They’ve not turned a profit yet and aren’t nearly close to the top market share holders. Ironically their distribution deal with live nation has been a solid source of sales ?????? how is liquid death pioneering a category? They sell water.

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