The Dream Job – and why you need to stop thinking that way
Time to remove the rose tinted specs?

The Dream Job – and why you need to stop thinking that way

After spending 14 years with the same company, it’s a funny thing to find myself starting my second new job in eight months. It’s a bit like being married for ages, then hurling yourself into a rebound fling with an inappropriate younger man (or woman, or whoever suits). And then wondering which way to jump next.

While I am very much in favour of the occasional ill-advised fling (she says despite being someone who hasn’t flung for well over 20 years), when it comes to accepting a job, a certain amount of clear-eyed thinking is wise. Here’s the question I think many people need to consider at some point in their career:

Is this ‘Dream Job’ too good to be true?

It might well seem like this is The One. The job that will propel your career into the stratosphere and bring you the fulfilment that your children don’t bring you, because all they do is bang on about Minecraft and demand snacks.

However, once you’ve set your mind (and let’s face it, a chunk of your heart) on it, your judgement may be shot. My experience is that it’s all too easy to overlook things in this state of anticipated bliss. Strategically you ignore the weirdness and warning signs. Getting carried away with the corporate equivalent of twinkly eyes and a lovely arse.

You might be right. Maybe it’s everything you dreamed of and more. In which case, enjoy a fabulous, fulfilling relationship with your new love.

Or, you might need to take off the rose-tinted specs and have a little word with yourself. I’m not suggesting you walk away – a fling might be just the thing you need to blow away the cobwebs. But, go into it knowing it’s a fling. Don’t announce the wedding and buy a frock that you have to shame-facedly stick on eBay a month later.

So, when a Dream Job rides over the horizon, here are a few things to ponder…

1)?????Don’t ignore the red flags: Everyone is going on about red flags in relationships at the moment and the same is true for jobs. Recruitment process a bit…ad-hoc? Ask why. Glassdoor reviews that look like a plot from EastEnders? Are you SURE it’s just disgruntled ex-employees having a moan? Has everyone you met worked there for about 20 minutes? Um…why? If you’re comfortable with the answers you find, go for it. But don’t stick your fingers in your ears, shut your eyes and hum the Wedding March.

2)?????Don’t mistake a swag box for an onboarding programme: We all enjoy a bit of swag (sustainable, non-tat swag, of course). A nice new water bottle, a t-shirt and a jar of organic honey make for great Insta content, but is that as sweet as it will get? It’s the onboarding equivalent of a bunch of roses – quick, easy, and requiring bugger all thought. Now, I’m not knocking them (recruitment and HR chums, don’t be cross). They’re a great way to make someone feel welcome, particularly when onboarding remotely. But if a box of…stuff... constitutes the most effort that a company has put into supporting your first step into a new corporate culture, the ‘care’ package probably needs a new name (suggestions welcome!).

3)??????Are they really that into YOU? You’ve fallen head over heels, which is lovely. But, do they feel the same way? Are they excited about your specific experience, skills and aspirations or do they just need the role filled by a warm body of roughly the right shape? I have a splendid career coach who advises successful candidates to ask for feedback after they’ve been offered a job. It makes sense – you’d always ask for feedback after a rejection, so why not find out what they valued in you so you can really bring that to the party when you start? If they can’t give a decent response, take a pause and ask why. If they’re not really that into you, being an expendable cog in the machine is not an unlikely future state.

I am truly not trying to pour cold water on the idea of a Dream Job. They’re out there. But it’s worth taking a moment to take off the rose tinted glasses and look at your future (working) life partner properly before you say ‘I do’.

Let me know if there are any dream job warning signs I’ve missed or keys to true love we should be looking out for!

Richard Emmett

Executive Management Consultant @ Capco | Banking, Operations, Regulatory Change, Programme Delivery Excellence, Portfolio Management

3 年

Wise words as ever Mrs H. I think in this day and age it pays to keep a critical eye on our own thinking, be that our own counsel, or a.n.other who's looking out for us from a not-too-far-away distance. When it comes to role changes and decisions on the next chapter, I was given some wisdom a few years back that I've worked to ever since... only change up to two of three things at any given time (1. the people you work with, 2. the domain you work in, 3. the customers/clients you work with). I only made the mistake of changing all three at the same time, once. Never again! ??

Sue Lappeman

Must keep reminding myself this is not Twitter. This is serious Mum.

3 年

Good indication you may not be as into it as you would like - asking when you can book some leave. A week into the job. ??

Izzy Capelin

B2B Marketing | Ex Airfinity, Streetbees, Elvie

3 年

Well written and couldn't agree more!

Andreia Corlade (Assoc. CIPD)

Fractional Talent Acquisition Leader | Private Equity | Talent Acquisition Process Improvement | Systems implementation | Europe, UK, US, APAC

3 年

I love this Carolyn - I always say my job is quite difficult because you actually have an impact on someone's life. I never talk about the "dream job", I would much rather focus on the reality of what a business is, opportunities and hurdles and why a candidate would be a great fit. I myself have accepted jobs that were sold and seemed the "dream job", just to then be brutally awaken by the harsh reality. Its not nice, doesn't do any favours to the company or the candidate and it can seriously impact someones' mental health if you step into a toxic environment. Love the blog ??

回复
Shani Mirwis

Senior Designer at nudge

3 年

"Glassdoor reviews that look like a plot from EastEnders" ????

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