Drama, Gossip, and Misinformation

I have always detested drama, gossiping, the passing of misinformation within the workplace.

This is a condensed, paraphrased version of an article everyone should read:

There are many ways to be a better chaplain and one that is often overlooked is to avoid, resist, and shut down drama, gossip, and misinformation in your workplace.

Drama, gossip, and spreading misinformation are incredibly toxic to teams and culture but are also unfortunately commonplace in many organizations. I found during my thirty years in the CF that drama, gossip, and misinformation was quite common. Yes, for some people drama, spreading gossip and misinformation is enticing and highly addictive. But like the plague, it’s in your best interest to avoid them for the sake of your peace of mind and career.

These things can have a huge negative impact on you personally and professionally. Here are three ways that you can escape being tangled up in them at work (and hopefully outside of work too).

Number one: Stop yourself.

Do not generate, pass along, or stir up drama, misinformation, or gossip. Resist it at all costs. Run from it like you would a charging bull.

Resist the urge to go to someone with a, “Guess what juicy gossip I just heard…” or engage in constant complaining, or be the one who cannot respect your fellow workers boundaries, especially if what you what you are sharing with them is negative and/or toxic. As you know many people thrive on such negative interactions. Whatever you do don’t be that kind of person.

Brené Brown talks about something she calls “common enemy intimacy.” In a nutshell, “common enemy intimacy” is the love of connecting and bonding with others over hateful things they hold in common. Relationships based on mutual negativity and disliking something, while they may be attractive perhaps even fun or entertaining to engage in with others, are neither healthy nor advisable.

You should not kid yourself, all forms of gossip and drama are toxic, unhealthy, and often incredibly damaging not only to workplaces, but to your professional relationships and other people. Putting an end to drama in the workplace starts with you — take ownership, become accountable, and commit yourself to intentionally stopping yourself from generating or engaging in drama, gossip, and misinformation.

Number two: Shut it down.

It takes two to tango and if you make it known that you are not open to engaging in workplace drama, gossiping, or spreading misinformation - it is at least a start to ending these highly toxic actions in your workplace. Saying no to these negative actions will mean one less lightning rod to receive or pass these toxins on.

For many people saying no to drama, gossiping, and passing on misinformation is hard to do. Especially if being a conductor of these things is something you’ve done a lot of up until now. It takes self control and making a better choices.

Here is simple test, if you wouldn’t be proud or if or you would be ashamed if ‘everyone’ heard what you are saying about another person then don’t do it behind their backs.

Show some backbone, be a better human, it’s not actually that hard at all. Shutting down drama, gossip, and misinformation is simply a matter of letting people know that you don’t have time for such negative narratives or interactions.

Number three: Mind your business.

What you spend your time and energy on is important.

Remember for your peace of mind that it’s a burden to harbour negative information and secrets about other people, and to get caught up in other people’s drama. Create some boundaries and accept that other people's ‘stuff’ is their business, not yours.

Keep your eye on the ball. Keep your mind on your own business Own what’s yours, let other people own what’s theirs.

Lastly, this all has a big impact on your career.

You will never know the opportunities that you miss out on in your career if you are known as, or are aligned with, the kind of people who are high drama, and create gossip and chaos. You will miss out on opportunities to advance because the Canadian Forces does not want to put toxic, high drama people into leadership positions. Those behaviours show low integrity, low self awareness, and it is common knowledge that leaders like that destroy team morale and create toxic cultures. They ruin organizations.

So those are the three things: Stop yourself, shut it down, and mind your business. Don’t just avoid it — be allergic to drama, gossip, and spreading misinformation at work.

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