A Dozen Simple Ways to Improve Your Networking – Part 1

Networking is not something you do when you need to get a job or attract new customers. Networking is a lifestyle discipline that should be started by the time you graduate high school.

?Every skill required in networking you likely know and have used in past interactions.? Now it is a matter of applying some best practices to what you already know to become an effective networker. We’ll cover Tips One through Six in this post, and Tips Seven through Twelve in Part 2 of this article.

One: Relationship is the Ultimate Objective. In its simplest terms, networking is about starting out as strangers and ultimately winding up as casual friends.? Casual friends know just a little more about each other than acquaintances do, but not as much as good friends. A causal relationship means that each party is open to continuing the conversation and will help one another when the ask is reasonable.

Two: It’s Not About You. Dale Carnegie, one of the greatest networkers in American history, says it better than anyone: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” ??Self-assessment check: am I others-focused or am I self-focused? Based on your answer, what needs to change?

Three: Meet and Greet. One of the best icebreakers is a simple “Hi, I’m {name}...and you are?”? Smile, look them in the eye and offer a firm handshake long enough to notice their eye color. Repeat their name back to them. Dale Carnegie often remarked that a person’s name, correctly pronounced, is the sweetest sound on earth to them. If necessary, ask them to repeat it and/or spell it for you so that you can mentally record it.

Four: Ask Questions to Start the Conversation. The easiest way to get to know someone is to ask them questions about their favorite topic – themselves. Use simple, direct questions such as, “Tell me about yourself,” “Where did you grow up?” or “What did you do today?” Take mental notes during your conversation, so that once you conclude speaking you record your notes before you meet the next person.

Five: Leverage Your Surroundings. Whatever brought the two (or more) of you together is a good place to start a conversation. Ask open-ended questions (ones that cannot be answered with a yes, no, or short answer), such as, “What brought you here today?”, “What are you impressions so far?”, “What did you learn today that you didn’t know or were surprised to hear?”, and “What do you hope will happen during the rest of your time here?”?

The next time you are impatiently waiting in a checkout line, prove to yourself how simple it is to start a conversation with a stranger by discussing your shared experience. Try asking the person in front of you, in a lighthearted tone of voice, "Do you ever think this line will get moving again?" At the very least you'll draw a chuckle or two and lighten the load. This identical situation happened to me, and I learned that the woman in front of me worked in a realty office on the next block to where I worked, and chatted about what was happening in the local real estate market.

Six: Listen Well. People can tell whether or not you are really listening by your focus on them versus on your surroundings. Listening involves a pleasant level of eye contact, a warm expression with a slight smile, and periodic verbal and non-verbal cues that you were listening. Ask follow-up “tell me more” questions, which is a sure sign you were listening. When you hear something that really stands out, you can ask the person, “do you mind if I take a quick a note about what you just said so that I can remember it.”?

Bottom Line

Your mother was right…it’s not what you know but who you know. In today’s world of 24/7 connectivity, becoming a highly effective networker means greater career success.

In what specific areas of your career might you apply these six networking principles?

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This article is derived from Boyer Management Group’s highly acclaimed ?course, Leading Through People 16 – Networking for Leaders .

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About me: For the past 25 years I’ve worked with some of the world’s top employers by helping them get the most out of their talented people. Thanks to our clients, the company I founded in 1998, Boyer Management Group, was recognized by CEO Monthly Magazine for its “Most Influential CEO Award, 2023” in the executive coaching field. Our coaching programs produce remarkable results in compressed periods of time. Our extensive?leadership development course catalog provides effective skills-building for everyone in the organization, from the new and developing leader to the seasoned C-level executive.? BMG boasts one of the most extensive sales and sales management curriculums anywhere, with behavioral assessments to help develop talent. I also help job seekers, higher ed, and employment services connect people to better jobs faster.?To find out more, please visit us at?www.boyermanagement.com , email us at [email protected] , or call us at 215-942-0982.?