THE DOWNSIDE OF GOOD IDEAS

Part of my beef with the advice industry is that we oversimplify.??I know I have once or twice.??It makes selling or explaining your idea easier, but at a cost.??Life isn’t always simple and clear.??Things are rarely black and white.??You have to be aware of the downside of otherwise good ideas (and vice versa).??

Consider these common examples:

Positivity is good… but you must be mindful of toxic positivity.??For some leaders and in certain work cultures, positivity can be taken too far.??It’s so highly prized.??Negativity is strongly shunned.??Thus, people feel compelled to show positivity whether or not it’s real and whether or not it’s appropriate.??People smell the insincerity.??This is an affront to honesty and authenticity.??Be positive, but not 100% of the time – that’s unnatural!

Authenticity is amazing… but too much can be a problem.??First, anyone who really stops filtering runs the risk of flouting prevailing norms and causing themselves problems in terms of strained relationships or lost opportunities.??Next, I think we can all admit that some people need to be managed towards containing themselves, not towards increased authenticity.??Yes, a select few need to be tamed instead of encouraged if we intend to maintain integrity and happiness at work!

Being selfish is bad… except when you realize that you are always your best advocate.??Do you seek achievement???Very often, your achievement excludes the possibility of someone else achieving (e.g., only one person can get the promotion).??Selfishness is normal, good, and healthy – when balanced and kept in check by being kind, helpful, ethical, and hard working.

There are many more examples:??kindness is good, but too much can lead to being taken advantage of; empathy is wonderful, but experiencing too much might lead to depression or hopelessness; and so on.?

What to do about this???Through training, coaching, and more candid workplace conversations we can become more self-aware and mindful in our application of deceptively black and white ideas.??This topic is great for team discussions, especially at an offsite or retreat since deeper conversations take a little more time.??Candid and humble leaders along with a good facilitator can help a lot.??

We have to stop being so simple!??Sometimes a good idea goes bad.??Sometimes a bad idea is revealed to be not so bad.??Good news – simple thinking can’t survive in the face of candid team dialogue.???

TODD’S TIPS

Collaborative decision-making can be about more than just building inclusion.??One very useful way to evaluate your employees’ abilities and aspirations is to create small spaces where they can safely tackle higher level managerial tasks.??So, think about a decision you normally would make yourself as a leader.??Then pull a team member aside, tell them you’re not sure about how you’re approaching this particular issue, and ask them for their perspective.??It shows them respect, gives them an opportunity to demonstrate competence at a new level, possibly gives you a new perspective, and provides you with insights that can impact how you develop and promote people.??It’s a win for all involved.

WHAT’S UP WITH DR. D?

Speaking:??I was chatting the other day with the person who hired me to speak to a senior leadership team at a large organization.??When the speech was over, she expressed how relieved she was that it was received so well.??It was a “Show Your Ink” talk and she informed me that the executive above her, who gave her permission to hire me, was worried that I might be too casual or unprofessional for their leadership team.??Can you believe people are still afraid of blue jeans and tattoos???She took a risk and convinced him otherwise.??It went very well.??She looked like a superstar that day!??Show some authenticity.??Show some guts.??Show Your Ink!

Courses:??A user called me on something last week that I’ve said in multiple courses.??I’ve asserted that we should not over-indulge excessively negative people in our lives.??They reminded me that most people are a mixed bag, not simply negative or positive all the time, and asked how to manager that reality.??The solution:??If they are mostly positive, find a way to value them!??If they are mostly negative, they must be avoided, managed, or removed depending on your circumstances.??If they are truly a mixed bag… 1) don’t enable the negativity, 2) coach them if possible to build their self-awareness on this issue, and 3) affirm and support the positivity you see.??Good luck!

Monsters:??One of the themes in Dancing with Monsters is empathy.??As the main characters strive to improve themselves, they begin to clearly feel empathy for each other.??That fact inspired me to write a post for LinkedIn on empathy called Empathy Needs Action (https://bit.ly/3PzT6Pu).??Thousands of people enjoyed the post, so I’m sharing it with you if you’re not seen it….and – I’m asking you to go live it this week!??Try to feel empathy and when you do – act on it.??Be measured.??Be reasonable.??Be kind.??But go try to see if there is a way you can be helpful when you sense someone struggling.??With a little luck, someone might do that for you too.???