Don't You want to be the CEO?

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The great Western disease is, ‘I'll be happy when... When I get the money. When I get a BMW. When I get this job. When I get the relationship,’ Well, the reality is, you never get to when. The only way to find happiness is to understand that happiness is not out there. It's in here. And happiness is not next week. It's now.

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After living with their dysfunctional behaviour for so many years, people become invested in defending their dysfunctions rather than changing them.

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It is a whole lot easier to see our problems in others than it is to see them in ourselves.

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Anybody can change, but they have to want to change.

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Fate is the hand of cards we’ve been dealt. Choice is how we play the hand.

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Dr Marshall Goldsmith

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Marshall's What Got You Here Won't Get You There is at one level a do-it-yourself guide to How to Become a CEO and at another a handbook to leadership coaches. My well-thumbed copy of Marshall's book bears testimony to the number of times I have referred to his book to coach leaders.

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I wish I had known what Marshall wrote about when I was a corporate leader. I would have been a far better leader. I got to know about Marshall when I was doing my coach training. I read his book 'What got you here won't you there'. Having been a CEO, business builder, serial entrepreneur and investor before failing as a monk and then becoming a coach, every word rang true.

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I reached out to him on LinkedIn. He invited me home when I was in the USA next. I did visit him at his La Jolla ranch. Marshall is one of the most generous persons I have met, always ready to give, never speaking about it. He is a practising Buddhist, highly spiritual, and silent on his beliefs. He has always been there willing to help whenever needed never once expecting anything in return.

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This blog is about Marshall. There are very few human beings like him. I have been lucky to have some of these few in my life. One another friend I have in the same mould is Prof Peter Hawkins. Everything said about Marshall applies to Peter. Coacharya is honoured to have both on our Advisory Board.

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Marshall helped me resolve a dichotomy I was facing while coaching corporate leaders, one that all leadership coaches aspiring to coach CEOs face. Marshall said, 'No CEO is going to waste their time with you as a coach if you try to get them to gaze at their navel. Their time is worth far more than what they are likely to pay you. They don't want your solutions. They want you to challenge their thinking and have them be aware of other options.'

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Coaches are often faced with the dilemma of 'Do I advise? Is advice a solution? If I suggest, is it against coaching ethics?' Challenging the client to reframe their perceptions leading them to become aware and create their pathway is not the same as 'leading questions', and is essential to effective coaching. If the client needs mentoring, and the coach is willing to redraw the agreement as mentoring, mentoring too can be done in line with coaching ethics. Here's some advice from Marshall.

?The 21 bad to good habit shifts Marshal writes about in 'What Got You Here Won't Get You There' need to be printed and placed on every corporate leader's desk in letters of gold. I use this book of Marshall as a Bible in coaching, far more valued than the competencies. A few of these nuggets of wisdom that are imprinted in my brain and have changed the way I behave are

·????? Don't ever say yes, but; or start with No. it's demeaning.

·????? Praise in public, criticize in private

·????? Don't steal credit for what someone else did

·????? Say thanks and apologise if someone's hurt, always, profusely

·????? Don't speak when angry

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In his support to Stakeholder Centred Coaching, Marshall brings in both the systemic approach to coaching using stakeholder support and the critical use of feedback. These principles are invaluable in teamwork using a systemic approach, in which the stakeholders the team impacts, and who are impacted by the team, become a part of the circle of systemic engagement.

We have Dr Marshall Goldsmith joining us on 14th May 2024 at 730 PM IST at Coacharya's International Coaching Week series of great speakers. It will be a fireside chat on the topic of relating to the multiple facets of Marshall with Pranav S Ramanathan, CEO, Coacharya. Do read some of Marshall's books before you join, you'll love them. These are the other 5 great speakers. Do join us.

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