Don't Tap on Life

By Captain Ron Aledo US Army (ret)

?(Originally published in 2002)

?Back in 1993 I saw my first UFC competition. My whole life changed that day. Two years later, in 1995 I?was for the first time at the Gracie Academy in Torrance California. In 1996 I was with the great Renzo Gracie at his Academy in New York. In 1997 I had the honor of competing at the Gracie Nationals in Los Angeles with the team of my great friend Pedro Valente from Miami.

In short, I discovered a true passion about submission grappling. Ever since, wherever I went I did Brazilian Jujitsu, from Ft Hood Texas, to Ft Benning Georgia, from Baghdad to Kabul, from Madrid to Miami, from Darmstadt Germany to Tonon, France, from New York to Kansas, from Bogota to Washington DC. Across continents for decades until today. And many times during the last 27 years people asked me why I have such a passion for grappling and submission, for the beautiful art and science of Brazilian Jujitsu.?My short answer is that it is a great sport and fun; nevertheless, there is a lot more to it.

?Let me explain: boxing is great. But if someone knocks me out with a punch, that person defeated me without any conscious "surrender" on my part. The knockout is just the physical reaction, not a matter of character or willpower. With submission, on the other hand, my opponent uses technique, position, and pain to force upon me a conscious surrender. I must do what I don't want to do: tap out. However, continuous training in the art of grappling teaches us to tap others out. Grappling trains us to endure and resist tapping out, both physically and mentally, and then when the time is right to tap out our opponent.

?Pain tolerance, a solid defense, adapting my strategy according to my opponent’s strengths, technique to avoid danger, a second wind, the will to not give up, determination to keep fighting, the will to continue, the ability of “find” -whatever it takes- a way out of trouble, and the never surrender attitude is what this art and science is all about.

?This “never quit” and “never surrender” attitude means more in submission grappling than in any other sport. So, what is the “lifestyle” lesson of this? Easy: learn to resist on the mat, learn to overcome defeat in the mat, learn not to tap in the mat, and most likely you will not tap on life. Translate your grappling skills into a practical lifestyle in order to?approach all problems in life!

?Whatever you do on the mat you can/might be translated into many other aspects of your life. You can learn, with patience and experience, to translate and move what you learned on the mat in to your life. The same discipline, will power, self-confidence, don’t quit attitude you earn on the mat, can be translated into an lifestyle in order to face your everyday problems and struggles.

?If you learn the art of submission well enough to resist giving up, if you endure the pain of the combat, if you can overcome the “bad position”,?if you learn to fight “from the bottom” and with your back pinned to the mat,?if you can try again and again, until you can get victory, then you can move that same approach to your everyday life. Basically,?if you can survive the fight without surrendering, then most likely you will have what it takes to make it through life without surrendering.?After more than 27 years practicing this addictive but beautiful art and science, I can tell you with complete confidence that no other sport inspires more the “never surrender” and “never give up” attitude. After all that is what submission is all about: surrender or be surrendered. It is the closest thing ever to what we can call a human “chess game”.

?Like in the mat, in life we all encounter problems and difficult situations, with relationships, our jobs, finances, the tragic loss of a family member or friend, etc., the list goes on. The key to success in life is the same as in submission grappling: keep fighting, don’t surrender, never ever quit.?That is the special element of this sport and the lifestyle it represents and teaches. Just as the Bible teaches us: “The life of man upon earth is a warfare…” (Job, Chapter 7). That is the lesson, that is the key.

?Is this lifestyle and philosophical approach what helped Rickson Gracie to overcome the tragic death of his 19 years old son? Is this lifestyle what will give us an extra hand when we think all is dark in our health, our finances, or our families? Very well this lifestyle might be a good “extra hand” to overcome trouble, depression and lack of inspiration or hope.

??Next time you find yourself in a hard situation and helpless, with a health or financial problems,?metaphorically pinned to the mat by the circumstances, and getting into depression and defeat...next time you feel like "tapping out", remember that in addition to the many factors than can give you hope (God and faith, support from family, friends and all that care and love you) you have a special kind of training that can give you an “extra hand” or extra “help”: You are a submission fighter! You are trained not to surrender! Every day you train to resist tapping in the mat. You are trained and ready to resist, with your back pinned at the mat, all that your opponent throws at you.?You then just have to resist whatever?life throws at you. Now go out and resist tapping on life, in the real world. Good luck and God bless!