Don't Take it Personal - Really?

I’ve often been told not to take work personally, it’s just business after all. At face value, this feedback provides some mental relief. Truly, we are more than just our jobs. But rarely do I fund the circumstances we face each day less than personal. They are professional AND personal. Why do we believe in this mutual exclusion in the workplace? Let's be clear about this, because because clarity is kindness, unclear is unkind (h/t Brené Brown).

If you work in an office, field, or plant location, your work is deeply personal. You bring your best self to work every day, amidst the hazards, and fill that space with your unique personality, gifts, and talents. The people you interact with are like a family – perhaps dysfunctional, but you may spend more time with them on the day to day than with your actual family. Their actions and words leave an impression, and whether it is a good day or bad day, you bring that energy home with you. Whatever occurs is personal, because you are a human with emotions, not a machine. The pay you bring often sustains your family, wellbeing, and future. I cannot think of anything much more personal than that.

If you work from home, there is much less separation between professional and personal realm. Work is literally in your sanctuary. Your family can hear and sometimes see your interactions and work products, in real time. We’re not talking about blurred lines; there is no line.

As a management / exempt employee, our professional existence is basically a handshake agreement between professionals of different rank. We can be let go at any time, with or without cause. Changing business needs and markets reinforce that dynamic. We trust our leaders to be fair, and in return we are allowed a salary and benefits, maybe even other perks, to sustain ourselves. Federal and state labor laws, as well as HR policy are the only safeguards to keep situations from going awry, but the same leaders have the most direct impact on or livelihoods than anyone. Additionally, business demands dictate the need to work excessively beyond sustainable human limits, with no guarantee of extra compensation or job security.

Again, what is more personal than that?

I maintain that rude comments, undue criticism, and straight up snark in the workplace is deeply personal (see my essay on gossip and feedback) The additional environmental factors described here simply a reminder that it’s all part of a larger equation. It is personal. And professional. At the same time.

Be well, and cheers to a New Year.