Don't Say the "M" Word!
Whoever enters here honors me; whoever doesn’t- pleases me.
-Friedrich Nietzsche
Live Yet Pre-recorded- Episode XXII of:
Don’t Say the “M” Word!
A Silent Radio Hour: Live Yet Pre-Recorded
MJ: Hey cherished listeners! We’re back! I’m Jonathan and this’ my brother Drew!
D: Indeed! We’re Jonathan and Drew who are unlikely to ever aspire to become: the Property Brothers!
MJ: And you think that this possibly bothers us?
D: Hell no! Hey, we may not be the actual Property Brothers but we are the actual hosts of our ‘A Silent Radio Hour’ which’s live yet pre-recorded here in the very heart of downtown Seattle, Washington of the United States of falling down: America!
MJ: Hey! I saw that movie!
MWW: Me too! Great film!
D: Better know it!
MJ: So then Drew! Why not give our, once again, cherished listeners, a very brief rundown concerning the film.
D: Falling Down’s a 1993 film staring Michael Douglas in the lead role of William Foster, a divorced and unemployed former defense engineer. The film centers on Foster as he treks on foot across the city of Los Angeles, California trying to reach the home of his estranged ex-wife in time for his daughter’s birthday party. Along the way, a series of encounters, both trivial and provocative, cause him to react with increasing violence while making sarcastic, cynical observations concerning life, poverty, the economy, and commercialism.
MJ: Sounds like the United States of repeating itself: America to me!
D: That’s absolutely correct Jonathan! America’s falling down, and who knows, possibly not getting back up ever again!
MJ: Please explain!
D: Foster’s cynicism emerges from his inability to maintain employment as he watches his life’s work; his very existence, fade away!
MWW: Back on our meds are we?
MJ: To the QuickStep (?) or QS and beyond!
D: Whatever! Look! Foster, who’s kind of a symbol for Middle Class America or MCA, not only lost his income but much more; he’s lost he’s very identity, his dignity as a Productive Human Being or PHB!
MJ: And where does this lead our American Foster, Drew?
D: He’s Pissed Off to the Max or POM! He no longer has work! He’s like all the rest of us who have lost so much to the so few! We’re all like those bic-lighters! All like this William Foster character! Once the fuel’s gone, toss ‘em into the LandFill or LF! Over and done! Outta-sight! Outta-mind! If you can’t see it, it don’t exist!
MWW: And that’s why you guys started this stupid…
MJ: That’s Ass Scratchingly Stupid or TASS!
MWW: I stand corrected! This Stupid Ass Scratching Show or SASS and its Boring, Monotonous, Mind-Numbing Insipidness or BMMNI!
D: Oh we love to make speeches don’t we?
MJ: He’s got a point there Drew!
MSC: I give my consent on that one!
W: Some tea hons?
MJ&D&MWW&MSC: Yes please!
MWW: Drew! You said we! Have you guys been replaced elsewhere?
D: Life is always “elsewhere” here in: America! And everybody now knows that the United States of “nowhere” has become: America!
MJ: Kind of grim there aren’t we, brother?
D: Kind of the truth there, brother!
MWW: Someone gonna answer the question? Have you guys been replaced elsewhere?
MJ: For another time Warren! For another time!
MWW: Whatever!
D: Moving forward! This Foster character has had enough! And what does he do?
MJ: What does he do, Drew?
D: That’s rhetorical, Jonathan! I was going to say that he lashes out against those around him instead of those who’ve taken from him his Very Identity or VI! He’s uniqueness as a Free American Individual or FAI! He’s the Quintessential American Worker or QAW who’s no longer needed but only wanted for and up to the point of his ability to consume, and his ability to “pay” for that consumption!
MWW: And if this Quintessential American Worker or QAW who’s no longer needed but only wanted for and up to the point of his ability to consume, and his ability to “pay” for that consumption no longer has the ways and means to pay, what then?
D: Into the LandFill or ILF!
MJ: And who’s taken from him his Identity as a Valued Member of our Social Structure or IVMSS?
MWW: Been using some of Drew’s QuickStep (?) or DQS, Jonathan?
MJ: I know a few words as well!
MWW: Right!
D: Those who have taken his very identity, his self-same work, that which makes him, him! His self-respect! They are the ones who pull and push the levers of society! Those who call the shots! What’s come to be known as the: 1%! Evil music in the background!
MWW: Silent radio Drew!
D: That’s why I said “Evil music in the Background,” Warren!
MJ: And that means?
D: We’re all of us fighting one another instead of the 1% which’s Laughing its Collective Asses Off or LCAO all the while playing the 99% against itself!
MJ: Therefore?
D: We constantly vote against our own Self-Interest or SI thus allowing the Omnipotent 1% to once again, Laugh their Collective Asses Off or LCAO!
MJ&MWW: Wow!
D: No guys! That’s Woe or W!
MSC: Now wait just a minute! You’re actually suggesting that there’s a conspiracy among the Ruling Elite or RE? You’ve ruthlessly maligned these poor, misfortunate: 1%! as being responsible for what America’s become? Mr. Drew or MD…
MD: I’m in bold! Finally in bold!
MSC: As I was saying…
MJ: We’re now all in bold! So what’s the point of using bold anymore?
W: I’m not! More tea hons?
MJ&D&MWW&MSC: Yes please!
MJ: Sorry about the lack of bold in your “W” but you’re not part of the “official” show!
W: Not a worry youngman! I know who and what I am! I know my place in the Universe! More tea hons?
MJ&D&MWW&MSC: Yes please!
MSC: So as I was saying! Mr. Drew or MD: Why do you constantly harass, criticize while damaging the good names of that 1% who watches over all of us with their tireless diligence? Their commitment to excellence? Their overall ability to produce on demand? Leaders and shakers all of them!
MJ&D&MWW: Whatever!
WW: And that leads us directly to our number one Corporate Donor or CD of our ‘A Silent Radio Hour!’ Drum roll please!
MJ&D&MSC: Silent radio Warren!
MWW: Whatever!
MSC: I’m not following this?
MD: We do it for the Money or M!
MJ&WW: Show Us the Money or SUM!
MSC: Gonna have to explain that one to me?
MJ: It’s quite simple!
MWW: And elementary my dear Watson! Drew?
MD: You see Ms. Show Censor or MSC, it’s all pretend! We feign foolishness while really making believe that we’re against Corporate Culture of CC! That we don’t like the Rich&Famous or RF while all the while we have our tongues so far up their asses we can barely breathe!
MSC: That makes on sense!
MJ&MD: Exactly! For you see! We’re Jonathan and Drew who forever remain “not” the Property Brothers!
MJ: And since we’ll never live up to such vaulted standards as portrayed by the before mentioned: Property Brothers, we whore ourselves out to The Big Corporations or TBCs while taking their Money or M Hand In Fist or HIF by making a show of being for the Common People or CP!
MD: Yeah! We’re just like all those politicians who pound their chests while proclaiming how much they love the common people all the while on TV, where I’m told, people can actually see you, they preach God&Country&CommonInterest or GCCI while holding their Grubby Little Hands or GLHs out to Big Business or BB!
MJ: Anyway! Just like those whores in office, we stand up for the Little Guy or Little Girl or LGLG but in reality…
MD: We’re taking it in the rear in backrooms and alleys for all the Money or M they’re worth!
MD: With or Without Vaseline or WWV! Whatever the occasion requires!
MSC: Oh people! That’s a FAKE NEWS ALERT! Really now! You expect anyone to believe that our treasured leaders in Congress! In the White House! In our Judicial System! That all of these people have become nothing but Common Prostitutes or CPs? That our very government, our vital institutes, the fabric of our culture and society, has become nothing but a RoadSide WhoreHouse or RSWH?
MJ&MD&MWW: Pretty much!
MJ: Best Little WhoreHouse in the United States of Taking it Up the Rear: America! Or BLWHUSTRA!
W: Some more tea hons?
MJ&MD&MWW&MSC: Yes please!
MJ: Perhaps we could also have a little shot of that Good Old Fashioned Kentucky Bourbon or GOFKB, please? Made In America or MIA!
MWW: I could certainly use a shot about now!
W: Sorry! No Kentucky Bourbon or KB here! Only tea!
MJ&MD&MWW&MSC: Thank you!
MD: Does America make anything else beside Good Old Fashioned Kentucky Bourbon or GOFKB?
MWW: Lots of guns and ammo!
MJ: Military Hardware or MH!
MWW: Good Old Fashioned Cannabis or GOFC which most people call Marijuana or M!
MJ&MWW: ‘A little bit of this, a little bit of that. A pot, a pan, a broom, a hat. Someone should have set a match to this place years ago. A bench, a tree. So, what's a stove? Or a house? People who pass through Anatevka don't even know they've been here. A stick of wood. A piece of cloth. What do we leave? Nothing much. Only Anatevka. Anatevka, Anatevka. Underfed, overworked Anatevka. Where else could Sabbath be so sweet? Anatevka, Anatevka. Intimate, obstinate Anatevka, Where I know everyone I meet. Soon I'll be a stranger in a strange new place, Searching for an old familiar face From Anatevka. I belong in Anatevka, Tumble-down, work-a-day Anatevka. Dear little village, little town of mine!’
MD: Very funny! Let’s leave ‘Fiddler on the Roof’ and its music outta this, okay! Besides! Silent radio! No one can hear your off-key singing!
MJ: But it was certainly fun!
MWW: I concur!
MSC: Let me get this straight! You people are merely emulating our Nations Leadership or NL and our Vaulted Business Community or VBC? That that which motivates those in charge of our National Character or NC actually have “no” character at all? And that the only way to get ahead here in these United States of Truly Blessed: America! Or USTBA is to become one of them? Act like them? Or as you maintain: Take it up the rear like them?
MJ&MD&MWW: Yeah! Pretty much!
MSC: And that there’s really no hope whatsoever?
W: Some more tea hons?
MJ&MD&MWW&MSC: Yes please!
W: You see! There’s hope!
MJ: And hopefully we’ll see you next time here…
MWW: Silent Radio Jonathan! Not TV!
MJ&MD: Whatever!
MJ: Hopefully you, our cherished listeners…
MWW: Silent Radio Jonathan! They can’t hear us!
MJ&MD: Whatever!
MJ: Hopefully Warren will Shut-The-Hell-Up or STHU for a moment so I can say: Come back next time for more of this delightful banter which exists here on our ‘A Silent Radio Hour’ coming to you all live yet pre-recorded here at The Spank the Monkey Café right here in the heart of downtown Seattle, Washington in the United States of Mightily Impaired: America! Or USMIA!
MD: That’s right! Because! We’re Jonathan and Drew who aren’t worthy to become TheMightyPropertyBrothers!
MWW: Got that one!
MJ: Good night!
* * *
To our cherished audience out there hopefully still listening to our ‘A Live Silent Radio Hour’ which’s live yet pre-recorded; I’m still disappointingly so, the show’s producer Warren Williams and I wish to thank all of you for tuning in once more while once again leaving any semblance of rational thought at the door as for the sake of TheJefferys: How in the hell can you listen to silent radio? I’m still here live yet pre-recorded and I simply don’t understand any of this! ( Inspirational Pause!) And please cherished audience, come back next time to hopefully Find-Out-the-Facts or FOFs concerning the nature of our Collective Debauchery or CD and how we all seem to have gotten use to taking it up the rear! Forevermore! Good Night Irene or GNI! May you make it once more through the night here in the Darkness which has become the United States of Falling Down: America! or DUSFDA!
* * *
MD: Good show was that one!
MJ: Truly! Made In America or MIA!
MWW: God Bless Us Everyone or GBUE!
MD: Or as it’s been stated time and time again: May TheJefferys Watch Over Us Tonight or MTJWOUT!
MD: And that’s Not Fade Away or NFA! And please guys! No breaking into a Buddy Holly Song or BHS!
MJ&MWW: “I’m gonna tell you how it’s gonna be….’
MD: Too late! Good Night or GN!